Ninjas are everywhere By Nancy - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I came home and noticed that sometime while I was at school, someone had cut off half of my ponytail. FML I agree, your life sucks 45 602 You deserved it 4 584 Share Tweet Share
Today, a big crab at the beach got hold of my headphones and wouldn’t let go. Rather than wait and try to tease them free, my husband just grabbed the crab and ripped the claw off its body. The man has no patience or respect for other living things at all. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 246 You deserved it 363
Today, I was informed by my next door neighbor that they heard me singing in the shower last night. I laughed and she told me that the family gathers in their upstairs room closest to my bathroom window to guess which song I'm singing. Every night. FML I agree, your life sucks 35 599 You deserved it 6 602
Today, I was stepping out of the shower while home alone. I heard voices coming from the living room. I grabbed a bat to defend myself and ran into the living room. I slipped on my tile floor and smashed my TV with the bat. No one was in my house, but I'd left the radio on. FML I agree, your life sucks 20 628 You deserved it 48 160
Today, I'm so broke that I hand-washed my socks with a bar of soap that I stole from work. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 446 You deserved it 3 110
Today, I went to get my underarms waxed. I'm usually not self-conscious because I figure they see worse stuff all the time. When I raised my arm for her to wax my armpit she looked at me, laughed and said, "Well I guess that's how I know it's winter in Wisconsin!" FML I agree, your life sucks 43 013 You deserved it 9 460
Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 169 You deserved it 6 170
Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML I agree, your life sucks 31 483 You deserved it 7 415
Today, my wife and I were out with another couple we're friends with. When we went back to their house we looked at old pictures. They showed us a great picture, and I said "It would've been a lot better if that fat chick didn't ruin it in the background." It was the woman from the couple. FML I agree, your life sucks 9 673 You deserved it 64 633
I find it funnier that no one else noticed or said something...friends much?
hahaha find out who that was and have retribution!