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Ouch, I’m not going to do anything funny or sarcastic here... I’m really sorry for your situation OP. I hope you can find someone who deserves your love and dedication. Fuck this bitch...
How many lesbians actually never figure it out until they are in a heterosexual marriage? Are we going to pretend that it is some huge number? Most of the homosexuals/bisexuals that I know of figure it out long before they end up in a heterosexual relationship that ends up going on long enough to result in marriage. unless you believe that sexuality can suddenly change overnight, and she can truly go from loving men to not being interested in men at all overnight. Then is it not fair to think that maybe she knew she played for the other team but lead him on for some selfish reason? Like to appease others or because she couldn't accept the truth? In either of those circumstances, both of which seem likely, I think that it is not unfair to say that the husband is a victim. Why are you so determined to excuse the woman as though there was nothing that could have been done to prevent her from ending up in a heterosexual marriage?
Could you please just tell me how that works? I don't understand how someone could spend who knows how many years in a relationship only to suddenly realize that they were never in love in the first place. I can understand being surprised by the realization but I don't understand how she got this far before the big realization even happened. It is one of the most absurd things I have ever heard. Once again, my mind immediately jumps to the idea that they knew but pretended to be something they aren't for a list of selfish reasons.
So, theoretically, your wife could give birth to your brother or sister?
Thanks for the bio lesson, chief! Sometimes, lesbian couples get a male sperm donor to have one of their eggs fertilized (sometimes in vitro), and they consider the child theirs. The mom's baby would therefore be the sibling of the OP.
13 years of marriage for me before her realization. Be classy and wish her well then move on with your life. You've done everything you can to fulfill your vows but it didn't work out. No shame or blame. And single live isn't so bad.
That's not how this works. Lots of gay people first have straight relationships or realize only later in life that they are actually gay. And it's also not active denial to hurt people. It's people thinking that it's normal to be straight so they just go through with it and don't think about it until they finally realize. It's not that every gay person gets a raging boner about someone from their own sex in their teens.
From what I've read, there are gay people who will try to pretend they're straight for fear of what will happen if they come out. Yeah, even in the 21st century, that happens because there are a lot of awful people who will do horrible things if their kids show signs of not conforming to their gender and/or if they act stereotypically gay. So maybe OP's soon-to-be-ex was afraid to come out and wanted to pretend to be straight, but she just couldn't do it anymore. OP, I've read of a straight spouses support network of folks who discover they're married to a gay person. They may be able to help you. I also hope you can move back to your original home.
I'm not gay but I'm bisexual so it's a little different. I'm a woman. So I always knew I liked guys and never really questioned that. However I knew I liked girls but I didn't want to admit that I also had feelings for girls the same way I had feelings for guys. It took me until about the age of 16 to finally accept that I'm bi and that I like girls as well as guys. It wasn't until 19 when I started coming out to people. I'm pretty sure gay or lesbian people have a similar coming out story.