Today, my sister brought a guy home while our parents were out. They had sex in her bedroom. I heard everything. The worst part wasn't her stupidly excessive moaning; it was that the moans sounded eerily similar to a cow mooing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML
Today, I was woken up by my sister and her husband pretending to make moaning sounds in the room next to mine. I began to make moaning sounds as well to fight back. It turns out the "moaning" was actually their dogs snoring down stairs. Breakfast was awkward. FML
Today, I heard my mother and father having sexual intercourse, and I found out that my mother moans the same way as my girlfriend. Guess who I now think about every time my girlfriend moans? FML
Today, my sister's boyfriend called while she was out. The second I answered he tried to have phone sex with me. When I explained to him that I wasn't my sister and that we just sound the same on the phone, he replied, "Don't care, let's keep going." FML
Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML
Today, I listened to my best friend describe having sex with her boyfriend in explicit detail. This would have been fine, but her boyfriend is my little brother. FML
Today, I was having passionate sex with my girlfriend of nine months. She was making a lot of noise, so I told her to keep it down, and reminded her that my parents and sister downstairs. A few minutes later, I got a text from my sister, saying my parents wanted to make sure I was wearing a condom. FML
Today, I heard my mom moan in the other room. FML
Today, I can hear my parents having sex in the next room. FML
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Top comments
Nyx_fml 23
Seems like her boyfriend wasn't the only one getting milked.
Nederlander95 14
I guess he was just a real BULL in bed
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Comments (90)
joea21 21
Welcome to the barnyard.
JoseIsAdork 31
milk me like one of your french cows!
NessaMae 19
I just ******* lost it reading your comment. That was amazing, it's officially my favorite thing now.
ZY1431 24
barn time brawl y'all
hitemup789 4
She took the bull by the horn...
jaycee1209 5
I see how the milkshake song started now.. ugh (shivers)
TheCerealKiller 24
At least they closed the door-implying she wasn't born in a barn.
ThatNutellaTho 6
I Soo Loved That Cx
timss4 19
Somehow I feel retaliation is way too easy with this one. But I guess that's just the evil mind of an older brother talkin haha
MilitaryPegasus 18
Omfg, that's great XD. I'm sorry op
olpally 33
He was just milking her, no worries. Hahaha.
carelessxdanger 9
could of been worse. at least she wasnt quacking (:
magickitten 26
Or she could have been baa-ing!