Today, my baby mama got her septum pierced. It's funny that if I called her a cow, she’d likely break up with me. But she gets the same ring in her nose as a cow, and NO ONE is supposed to notice that. I can only think of cows when I see it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. I also found out from her husband that she has her nipples and nether regions pierced. FML
Today, I got a nipple piercing. My girlfriend thought I was pranking her with a fake piercing, because I wouldn’t be "daft enough" to get a real one, and she yanked it off, or rather through, my nipple. Yes, it cut my poor nip in half, and I now have two nipples where once I had only one. FML
Today, I was working customer service at a large grocery store. I recently got a small, tasteful septum piercing that is barely visible. As I greeted a customer, she began to gag, held out her hand as though she was fending me off, and said, "I can't. Your nose ring makes me sick." FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend got some new piercings and decided to show me. They are the exact same piercings that the girl I'm currently seeing has. I'm starting to think she's still keeping tabs on me. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed. He gave me a really unique ring that I absolutely loved… at first. When I showed it off to my friends, one of them laughed so hard that she started crying, and said it looks just like a vagina. She's right, and now I can't unsee it. FML
Today, I was adjusting my nose piercing from the inside. My mother saw and thought I was picking my nose, so she slapped my hand away, tearing my nose ring out in the process. FML
Today, I flew home to visit my parents. We haven't seen each other in two years, I've gotten a few tattoos done since, and I knew they wouldn't approve, so I bought whole new outfits that covered everything and looked professional. When I got there, the first thing my mom says to me is, "Is that a nose ring!?" FML
Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
Today, my mother accused me of getting another lip piercing done on the sly to spite her. She finally realised I have more than one and won't believe I've always had two. Thanks for noticing, mom. FML
Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Chazzster 32
My grandparents were farmers. Even worse than the cow image, is the fact that pigs commonly get a ring put in their nose to keep them from rooting in the ground with their snouts and getting out of their pen by digging under the fence. And that’s the image that comes to my mind… A little advice - Never share these thoughts with your girlfriend. Think of something else if possible. Beauty has many standards, what some people like is not what everyone likes.
RichardPencil 32
Don't have a cow, man!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (6)
RichardPencil 32
Don't have a cow, man!
Blobby McGee 5
that is one of the most unattractive piercings. Probably THE most unattractive one. I don't know why people feel the need to do that.
mike3775 39
I feel you man. Every time I see anyone with that type of nose piercing, that’s the first thing I think as well.
Chazzster 32
My grandparents were farmers. Even worse than the cow image, is the fact that pigs commonly get a ring put in their nose to keep them from rooting in the ground with their snouts and getting out of their pen by digging under the fence. And that’s the image that comes to my mind… A little advice - Never share these thoughts with your girlfriend. Think of something else if possible. Beauty has many standards, what some people like is not what everyone likes.
Yudith 28
I hope she doesn't get her ears tagged as well.