Intimacy, Sex, Awkward and Cute: Funny guy

Funny guy

By Anonymous - 09/09/2022 02:00 - United States - Lima

Today, my boyfriend and I were finishing in the bedroom; he pulled out and finished on my stomach. Then he figured that was the time to quote Shrek, saying, "Better out than in I always say." FML

agreeclassic 1 085

vote type 1 375

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

Gamers rise up

By jokersgirl - 21/05/2019 04:00

Today, my boyfriend and I had the wildest sex we'd ever had. I was on top of him and started going at it like crazy. I was close to finishing when the Mortal Kombat phrase "FINISH HIM!" popped into my head. It wasn't until I saw a weird look on his face that I realized I'd said it out loud. FML

agreeclassic 2 356

vote type 1 907

Repetition

By Fuck - 25/02/2015 21:39 - United States - Fowler

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

agreeclassic 36 811

vote type 1 4 453

You're welcome

By Anonymous - 04/06/2025 13:00 - United States - Lincoln

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he pulled up his pants and said, "There you go." FML

agreeclassic 330

vote type 1 125

By zamwow - 20/12/2013 23:36 - United States - Ridgefield Park

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML

agreeclassic 60 876

vote type 1 8 879

By nah - 04/02/2009 14:35 - United States

Today, my inebriated boyfriend and I were having sex. He rolled off of me without finishing, and said, "I'm bored." FML

agreeclassic 47 013

vote type 1 7 585

Superfuzz Big Muff

By miiiiilk - 05/12/2010 11:12 - United States

Today, as my boyfriend was about to go down on me, he held his breath and said, "I'm going in!" FML

agreeclassic 31 671

vote type 1 9 540

Romance is dead

By Anonymous - 15/02/2010 13:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to have sex with with my boyfriend. After we had finished, I jokingly said, "Who's going to sleep in the wet patch?" He got up and said, "You're optimistic, I'm not staying. Oh, and I'm dumping you, that performance was disappointing." It was my first time. FML

agreeclassic 37 621

vote type 1 4 543

By Anonymous - 23/01/2010 16:09 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML

agreeclassic 27 398

vote type 1 3 466

By Anonymous - 31/12/2010 19:03 - United States

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and badly needed to pee. Just as I was about to say I had to go to the bathroom, my boyfriend suddenly put his hands around my stomach and picked me up. He hit just the right spot, causing me to empty my bladder then and there. FML

agreeclassic 36 374

vote type 1 4 503

Dirty talk

By Anonymous - 14/03/2010 07:54 - United States

Today, I was in bed with my boyfriend, in the middle of foreplay, and somehow out of my mouth came, "I want to be inside you." I'm a woman. FML

agreeclassic 26 833

vote type 1 10 215

Marcella1016 31

Friday 9 September 2022 9:08

Well, he’s right. Otherwise it’s coming out 9 months later.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 9 September 2022 14:07

What made him think of Shrek at that moment? Were you doing it Donkey-style?

Comments

Marcella1016 31

Friday 9 September 2022 9:08

Well, he’s right. Otherwise it’s coming out 9 months later.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 9 September 2022 14:07

What made him think of Shrek at that moment? Were you doing it Donkey-style?

Marcella1016 31

Friday 9 September 2022 22:01

Careful. ...I hear coming from behind can get you kicked.

mattiagardin 15

Friday 9 September 2022 14:18

Incredible dude, really funny

Wadlaen 23

Saturday 10 September 2022 0:01

He's a keeper!😅

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I was sitting in my room while my mom was talking to my uncle. I had my door open. She said, "Yeah my son doesn't know I have his phone password. Girls nowadays are real sluts." FML

agreeclassic 32 645

vote type 1 8 864

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. His mother, seconds upon meeting me, gave me a hug, smiled at me, and said: "It's so nice to finally meet you! All I ever hear is 'Emma this', and 'Emma that', 'I love Emma!'. He never stops talking about you!" My name's not Emma. FML

agreeclassic 48 252

vote type 1 2 715

Today, after getting home from work late last night and feeling lazy, I'd put my leftover dinner in the microwave, spoon and all. I wake up to find one of the kids started the microwave and it blew up because of the metal spoon. FML

agreeclassic 711

vote type 1 2 699

Today, I walked into work, only to be greeted by the office asshole saying, “Whoa! You’re still here?! I thought for sure when Trump ended that DEI crap they wouldn’t let you keep your job. Welcome back I guess.” Can we say HR MEETING?! FML

agreeclassic 646

vote type 1 198

Today, my girlfriend came over to stay the night. Before she arrived, I popped a Viagra to spice things up. She then informed me that she was on her period and didn't feel comfortable doing it. I had a headache and a massive boner all night. FML

agreeclassic 15 225

vote type 1 47 410

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

agreeclassic 63 127

vote type 1 9 627

Funny guy

Similar FMLs

Gamers rise up

Repetition

You're welcome

Superfuzz Big Muff

Romance is dead

Dirty talk

TOP COMMENTS

Comments