Today, I confronted my daughter about the various drug-associated items I found in her room. She then confronted me about going in her room and invading her privacy, to the point where I forgot the main issue and apologised to her. I just got outsmarted by a teenage pothead. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, my mother has taken her drug paranoia to a new level. She threw away an open but nearly full bag of dried mint because she's sure I emptied and refilled the bag with marijuana to hide it from her. She then tried to ground me in my own house in front of my wife and daughter. FML
Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML
Today, I came from a 12-hour shift to find my clothes and stuff outside, and the locks changed. I called my mom to let me in and she told me, “Hell the fuck no, I’m not having a drug addicted junkie up in my house! You’re no longer my daughter!” and hung up. Apparently, she found my stash of weed. FML
Today, my thieving, layabout stepmom planted weed in my bedroom and showed my dad. Well, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but her smirk and telling me later that I shouldn't fuck with her again seems conclusive to me. Goodbye freedom. FML
Today, my grandma saw me putting some mints in my mouth when she walked by my room. Instead of confronting me, she told my dad I was doing drugs. FML
Today, I followed my daughter and found out she wasn’t with friends, she was on a date. I confronted her about the lie, but she takes after her mother, a lawyer, and steamrollered over me about invading her privacy, so even though she lied, she somehow has the moral high ground. FML
Today, I pooped in a drug store bathroom but forgot to flush. I left to go find my mom and found her in the toy section. I guess after I had walked away oblivious, a woman had walked into the bathroom behind me and found the kids I'd abandoned. She then came and found my mom and me, then yelled at me. FML
Today, my mother went through my bag and found what she thought was rolling papers. I was yelled at and called a stupid pothead with no future. They were facial blotting papers. FML
Today, like an idiot, I accidentally included stuff I learned from snooping in my daughter's secret diary during a conversation with her. She's not happy at me right now, so I may have to polish off my old grovelling skills from when I was still married to her mom. FML
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Top comments
thefallenqueen 5
parents these days..
1337Anonymous911 3
So you just let the drug abuse continue?
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Comments (303)
legitkitty 11
Parents have the right to go through their children's things if there's drugs involved, but otherwise it's a pain in the ass! Don't worry, OP, you can punish her even worse now >:)
LaughterofCorn 4
Well I hope you gathered your thoughts and assessed the issue again!
rcgirl2 11
So you're not going to get her any help or do anything about it? Apparently you are stupid.
Pentium_4 27
could have been the first time OP found out
trollolol95 4
They never said they wouldn't do anything about it. Once they realized their daughter outsmarted them, I'm sure some punishment was involved.
B4DR0M4NC333 0
Wow you just got manipulated...xD
redreynard 14
You've been had by smokey. Sucks.
Stardew 19
Unless she's paying rent for that particular room, you haven't done anything wrong. My mother would have knocked the shit out of me for accusing her of invading my privacy when I still lived with her.
dude1122332 9
And the student becomes the master.
IsAbElLiCiA20 6
If you had longer hair, you'd look like the real life captain hook.
grahambertus 11
Except it would be very easy to beat her daughter in an argument (not physical abuse, just outwit her). OP, it seems, is just somewhat of a pushover.
moonsxstars 6
Great parenting methods you have.