Today, I went to a yard sale and found a cute plush duck. I sent a pic of it to my friend with the message "Jackpot!" I guess she didn't see the pic because she called me up all excited, thinking my boyfriend of 6 years finally proposed to me. "No, I said, I just found a big duck for $1." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I stopped at a park because a duck was following me. I assumed it wanted food, so I gave it a small piece of bread. It followed me to my car, waited beside the door, and then followed me across the parking lot. I may have accidentally adopted a duck. FML
Today, I took part in a raffle that was being organised in the small countryside village where I'm vacationing. I live in big city. I won a duck. A real, live duck. FML
Today, a client walked into my store with a duck in her hands. I had to explain to her that she couldn't bring the bird shopping with her. We got a 1-star review. FML
Today, I walked outside to see my boyfriend standing on my porch, looking confused. He explained to me that he had attached a prom proposal note to his pet rabbit, and let it inside my house to find me. We went looking for said rabbit, and found my dog halfway through eating it. FML
Today, after I'd spent two weeks planning the perfect proposal at the aquarium, right as I got down on one knee, a little kid pointed at me and yelled, "Mom! That man dropped something!" Half the people around us started looking around for whatever I'd "lost" instead of watching the proposal. FML
Today, I received the photos my friend took of me proposing to my girlfriend. I'd proposed at the place we'd first met: the local zoo. When I looked them over, I noticed there was an elephant taking a shit in the background. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house with his family. A kitten walked over to me with an engagement ring tied to its collar, along with a note that said "Marry Me?" I got super excited, only to find out that it was for his brother's girlfriend of 10 months, not me. We've been together 4 years. FML
Today, I found a ring box in the pocket of my boyfriend's pants while doing laundry. I eagerly walked up to him knowing that it was an engagement ring, hoping that he would propose on the spot. He tossed it back to me and said, "Well you found it, I don't actually have to ask now, right?" FML
Today, my boyfriend bought me a voice personalized Build-a-Bear. I thought he was going to propose to me through it, only to press the foot of the bear and hear, "We should break up" instead. FML
Today, my girlfriend texted me, telling me to come home quickly, because she had a "surprise" waiting for me. I convinced my boss to let me go home, and rushed out. Turns out the "surprise" was just that she'd bought herself a pet bunny. FML
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Top comments
iKaite 0
Well at least you will have the duck if your relationship doesnt work out. Duck me.
anniesaysbueno 0
actually OUR lives are ****** for having to read this pointless FML
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Comments (105)
anniesaysbueno 0
actually OUR lives are ****** for having to read this pointless FML
KO2 0
Lmao!! So true!
plexico 3
Who the hell says "Jackpot" if the bf proposes? A couple of gold-digging *****. By the way, you are never going to marry this guy. That may be for the best, but if you really want to get married, you're going to have to dump him and find someone else.
blue_elephante 0
IKR? You would say yay or something. JAckpot is what you say after you have sex with some one you like! Your friend is slow
regalarius 0
I dated the woman who is now my wife for five years...we were waiting to be done with school, and for finances to be where they should be so she could have her dream wedding.
L0veh8te 0
This must be a chick thing ........
paperfox_fml 0
I don't think so, because I'm just as confused as everyone else o.O
ddrluna 2
Me too. Why in the hell would she assume the OP got engaged because she said "Jackpot"? That's the last thing I would assume. Usually when someone gets proposed to, they would say something like "I got engaged!", or "OMG HE PROPOSED!" Or something. OP: Your friend is stupid.
DrAwesome 6
Uhh, no. It's a duck thing. It never even mentioned chicks.
thunderbrave 0
hahahah I love you #76
thunderbrave 0
#72** reply fail.
DrAwesome 6
It's all right, thunderbrave. I love you too. :D
manoverboard 0
Yes. Your life is ducked.
prb 0
I read big dick by accident
xHaniffax 0
wth how is this an FML??
manoverboard 0
But she never said he proposed...?
Schumy0724 4
I don't get it. this is not a FML.
miss_green_fml 0
It's not a strong FML, but it's fun to read. I would feel stupid if my friend thought I'd got engaged and the only reason for the excitement was a bargain duck! Duck Your Life indeed.
Uvula 0
Your life is ******, try suicide.