Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I just landed in Washington, DC. Unfortunately, I also took off from Washington, DC an hour ago. FML
Today, my car broke down in the middle of nowhere. I walked about 3 miles to the nearest house to call a tow truck. When I got back to where I left my car, it was gone. FML
Today, for the first time in about 3 years, I decided to clean my car. It was going really well until I looked down at what I was about to pick up. On the back seat floor lay a dead snake, which at one point, for God knows how long, was living in my car while I unknowingly drove it around. FML
Today, I was going to a Harry Potter convention since I love the books so much. On my drive there I got lost, and it only got worse when my car broke down. Since I'd forgotten my phone, I tried to hitch a ride. I stood on the side of a road for two hours dressed like Ron Weasley. FML
Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, thanks to my new anti-anxiety meds, I am finally no longer agoraphobic. Today also marks 5 weeks of constant diarrhea due to the same meds. Guess who's not leaving the house anytime soon. FML
Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML
Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML
Today, I was on a flight coming back home. On my right was a fat monk who was snoring very loudly, and on my left there were two old women who were talking about their teenage love lives in detail. The flight was 17 hours long. FML
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Top comments
FuckYouScience12 8
I can't even imagine the smells going on in your car.
ladystate 22
At least it's just farts.
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Comments (166)
ladystate 22
At least it's just farts.
ShakenNotStirred 6
So far.
awkwardloveannie 28
if the car sick cat gets worse it will be farts and barf
SarcasticShade 16
That's just purrfect.
Adree 15
Download the "ride" app. You get points for traveling, and all that adds up pretty quickly and you can redeem for gift cards and stuff, all you have to do is get moving.
killuhand 12
#57 I deliver pizzas and I just searched everywhere for that app and it doesn't exist, at least not on android.:(
meepmerp 20
Lol advertising on fml
dingleberrysteve 6
the great thing about dogs, they love car rides
awkwardloveannie 28
not all my labrador panics
1217jonathan 15
It's FML
ShyAnn29 15
80, not all dogs love car rides, one of my dogs get car sick, and she whines while in the car.
xxrogerthatxx 19
Ydi for owning cats
jujubean0531 5
She's like Bella !
The_Big_Boss 20
You don't have to bring them if it is that bad
Lacist 19
He's moving.
The_Big_Boss 20
.... And?
Retrokitty 9
And you don't just leave your pets behind.
tigerisabelle 31
That's kind of like "my baby cries a lot, so I'm going to leave her at home while I move away! La da da!"
horneyhic 15
I agree who wants cats anyway
The_Big_Boss 20
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
#14 why not? They're replaceable
Welshite 40
#26: Stop trolling.
LonerTheWolf35 8
One does not simply replace their pets.
Ecudaniel 16
I think #3 was abandoned by his parents when they were moving...
Rainhawk94 27
#29. I go for the latter. All in favor say here
HelloooooNurse 20
#26, trolling or not, it's assholes like you that are the reason that shelters are so overcrowded with pets. Your mom should have swallowed you instead!
eddeeezzyy 19
#26 you've clearly have not had a pet before. But then again if you ever had, I'm sure they've all ran away from YOU instead.
mdcdeve 10
I think the FML staffer is somewhat biased in this case as they also own two cats. :p
FuckYouScience12 8
I can't even imagine the smells going on in your car.
Trivision 10
Well hey, at least OP knows exactly how many more miles to go!
yawateverok 10
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
you're are not funny and I'm am serious about that
WompWompWomp123 7
Well, I think " you're are" funny and "I'm am" serious about that.
tobias_four 5
#69 Ohh sweetie check your grammar I'm sorry but that's just...
gmian 34
Meow, that sounds like quite the catastrophe
abitabanana 8
I think even I am feline sick thinking about it..
The_Big_Boss 20
You tried
aimeegoldberg 22
Oh meow you didnt!
SimplyBird 9
Perfectly good thread going until #60 ruined everything...
the_real_dvd 21
I know I'll get hate, but this is why I believe the only useful animals are the ones that work, or the ones you can eat. If I need companionship, I look to human friends.
DragonDude 24
What if you have no friends? Then you're kinda screwed.
horneyhic 15
Cats are particularly useless you feed them and they treat u like there better then you atleast a dog is loyal and acts as a decent burglar alarm
Edumcg 24
The ones that work? so.... every animal on the planet?
the_real_dvd 21
36, when's the last time a cat did any useful work for you? A dog will at least bark if there's unwelcome company.
JustKittyKat 24
My cat kills rats, spiders, and frightening bugs. She alerts me when I'm home alone and someone is near the house, she cuddles me when I cry, keeps me warm at night, gives me companionship, checks on me, and studies are showing evidence that a cat's purr (which they use to increase their own bone density) can also have the same affect on their humans. You may not be an animal person, but that gives you no right to impose your "superior" beliefs on everyone else.
the_real_dvd 21
Geez. Get a grip #44. I never stated my opinion was superior. I just stated my preference. You're the one having trouble handling it. You know what else kills bugs? Other bugs. But I'm not a big fan of moving cane spiders into my house to handle the mosquito problem. I've no problem with other people owning animals. I just don't want them. If you need to understand why, look back at all the posts that say, "Today...my cat... FML".
iAlissa 34
52, if you think you should only have animals for the sole purpose of doing your work or eating them, that's rather shallow in my opinion.
jkmartinjk 16
^Hold up gurl, you on the wrong thread!
OscarDV 8
am I the only one seeing 93's comment between 42 and 60?
ShyAnn29 15
110, nope I see it too.
ApollosMyth 22
Maybe farther into the trip, the cat will start feline better and stop stress farting.
tigerisabelle 31
My dog also hates car rides, and I know that cats and dogs are different, but giving Misty a few drops of Benadryl calms her down a lot. I've talked to multiple vets who all say its okay. So maybe that would help? Sorry though OP! Maybe bringing the cats along was a meow-stake.
AnthonyWheeler15 24
Windows are going to be your best friends on this trip.
ViktoriaaKills 13
unless the cats aren't in carriers. personally, my cat loves to free roam a moving vehicle but she stresses in a carrier.
itskaybytheway 10
At least now you may be able yo have your windows rolled down a little. Once you get to WA you'll need to have your windows rolled up and the heater on.
pickleOnABun 10
nice profile picture...
ItalianChaos 14
That wasn't creepy at all, #121.
joea21 21
More of a reason to be a dog person
Retrokitty 9
My dog gets carsick. He puked on my sister a few times on long car rides.
tukies 28
Dogs get car sick too.
joea21 21
That's not the point I'm trying to make. People get car sick too... I'm saying dogs are better.
HelloooooNurse 20
They really aren't much better, dogs are the equivalent to 3 year old child, they need constant.
cyttex 13
They need constant what 53? You're killing me here is it constant air? Constant food? Constant children? I need an answer dammit man.
joea21 21
What 56 said. Plus cats are like that a$$hole uncle no one likes. They ignore you till you're doing something important than they mess with you till you get annoyed and wanna play with them and they ignore you again. Dogs are way better
HelloooooNurse 20
Oops, damn phone. They need constant Supervision.