Kids: Inappropriate but funny

Inappropriate but funny

By um... maybe - 12/03/2013 22:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I was helping my father-in-law out at a family barbecue. Somehow, the topic turned to grand-children, at which point I confessed that my wife has been having trouble conceiving. His response was to boom: "Sure you've been putting it in the right hole, son?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 981

You deserved it 5 030

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Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Charming dude

By unzucht - 30/05/2012 16:45 - Romania - Bucharest

Today, my wife and I convened our families for a joint dinner, followed by me breaking the news that my wife is pregnant. My father visibly scoffed, and my grandfather spent the rest of the evening muttering to him about how "breeders should be shot". Wonderful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 722

You deserved it 2 490

By crazy mother in law - 17/12/2012 18:48

Today, my husband told my mother-in-law that we're trying to have a baby. She decided to call me and explain in extreme detail what positions to try, and when. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 108

You deserved it 5 020

Little shit

By Anonymous - 12/12/2021 16:58

Today, while at a family reunion, I jokingly asked my 18-year-old son, "When are you and your girlfriend going to give me a grandson?" He then retorted, "When are you going to die?" I was unable to answer at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 1 674

But my grandbabiiiiiiiies

By Anonymous - 23/01/2016 09:21 - Australia - Canberra

Today, after the topic of grandkids came up yet again, my fiancé confessed that we've been having trouble conceiving. Later, I overheard his mum telling him to take my engagement ring back to the store and get a refund, because apparently I'm not worth marrying if I can't give him kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 018

You deserved it 1 637

By Anonymous - 28/10/2012 16:44 - United States

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 050

You deserved it 6 139

Weird flex, but OK

By Anonymous - 16/02/2021 19:02 - Mexico - Mexico

Today, I learned that my mother-in-law gives better head than my wife. How? It wasn't from my experience, but thanks to a casual conversation with my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 417

You deserved it 161

By lababy - 15/11/2011 17:20 - United States

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 773

You deserved it 21 133

By Steve.mc - 01/05/2011 07:03 - Canada

Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 459

You deserved it 7 974

By Margo - 15/11/2011 15:16 - United States

Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 256

You deserved it 64 255

Misery loves company

By Anonymous - 03/10/2011 21:41 - United Kingdom

Today, my 20 year-old daughter started ranting to me about her latest boyfriend's erectile problems. Trying to be a good dad, I told her all I knew about how to get the boy fixed. My wife decided to stick her head in and say, "Listen to your dad, hun. He knows all about this kind of thing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 872

You deserved it 5 788

AlittleSanity 11

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:43

The left one, right?

tacojauns 45

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:45

Hey man any hole is a goal

Comments

Missy2612 11

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:51

It's a valid question!

JoeGrant 12

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:54

Look him straight in the eyes and say, "I am sure." Show him your confidence.

IamBunghole 9

Wednesday 13 March 2013 6:36

" Yes sir, I've porked your daughter enough to know which hole it is."

Devilpuppy0861 7

Wednesday 13 March 2013 7:59

Or look him in the eye and say "I do both just to make sure I cover my bases" then drop the mic and walk away like a pimp.

cb1002630 11

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:56

Hopefully he was just giving you a hard time.

ihaveasushicat 24

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:57

The sense of humour is great, but I'm sure it was embarrassing that he yelled that at the family BBQ...

SomeRandomUser 19

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:57

"Believe me, I covered them all."

DarkskyFML 5

Wednesday 13 March 2013 6:07

You should have replied "I think so, but it does smell awfully bad now that I think about it".

karlcolt45 19

Wednesday 13 March 2013 6:08

you can never be too careful there

mpsteve137 15

Wednesday 13 March 2013 6:11

Why the heck would he ask that about his own daughter

Shrike 23

Wednesday 13 March 2013 6:14

Yeah... because that was the what he was FMLing about...

chanellgymnast 17

Wednesday 13 March 2013 6:14

Well... This is awkward son.

Keywords

Relatable Students Work Mental health Parenting Kids Awkward Love Embarrassing Wanker Intimacy Family AITA First Dates Singing Cats Animals Weddings Public freakouts Bodyshaming Cops Transportation Cars Sex Sexism Growing old Health Periods Job interview Education

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I agree, your life sucks 241

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I agree, your life sucks 38 465

You deserved it 5 537

Today, my 7-year-old cousin has been having raging temper tantrums, added to an inability to tell the truth, and a disturbingly sociopathic nature. I'm pretty sure I'm seeing a psychopath in the making, and I'm stuck living here for 2 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 630

You deserved it 236

Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 821

You deserved it 76 613

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I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 985