Animals, Relatable, Awkward and Intimacy: I LOVED THAT LITTLE GUY - FML

I LOVED THAT LITTLE GUY

By Anonymous - 30/05/2012 05:46 - United States - San Diego

Spicy

Today, after a surprise candlelit dinner and a two bottles of wine for my birthday, my boyfriend and I decided to take a sexy shower together. It ended with us both drunk, naked, and crying, wedged into a small tub together, talking about our dead pets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 176

You deserved it 8 486

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Same thing different taste

By cfaul001 - 29/02/2012 17:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got extremely wasted and decided to take a shower with my boyfriend. What seemed like a good and sexy idea turned into us falling and getting wedged in the bathtub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 211

You deserved it 27 757

Partied out

By kp. - 31/08/2010 12:46 - Australia

Today, it was my boyfriend's birthday. After spending a reasonable amount of cash to get us a nice hotel room to celebrate, he decides he would rather spend the night drinking with his friends. They all threw up in the bath tub before passing out on our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 166

You deserved it 4 497

By Anonymous - 08/01/2011 20:15 - Netherlands

Today, I called my boyfriend for a romantic night at home. I put on my hottest little dress, dimmed the lights, and put music on. My boyfriend stumbled in much later, drunk, and took one look at me before throwing up on my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 807

You deserved it 4 151

Mood ruined

By InterestingReaction - 10/04/2022 04:00

Spicy

Today, it was mine and my girlfriend's two-year anniversary. Back in my room, I decided to get sexy for her by opening the bathroom door, dropping my bath towel, and slowly approaching the bed in the buff. I tripped over my feet and fell flat on my face twice while doing so, which she hysterically laughed at. FML

I agree, your life sucks 930

You deserved it 498

By TheMissMuffly - 31/07/2012 15:53 - United States - Monmouth

Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 828

You deserved it 53 129

Come together, right now

By Anonymous - 15/04/2023 13:00 - Canada - Stratford

Spicy

Today, it's my birthday, and I had one to many and my best friend and my boyfriend had to take me home. We went back to my apartment and all squeezed together in my bed. During the night I got sick and spent the rest of the night on the bathroom floor. Later I found out that they'd fucked in my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 422

You deserved it 366

Date grape

By Anonymous - 05/09/2019 08:02 - United States - Staten Island

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were drinking wine naked after sex. He went to get another glass, but on the way back tripped and fell flat on his face. His roommate unexpectedly came home, saw him face-down on the floor, thought I'd drugged him and tackled me before I could explain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 100

You deserved it 242

By mybad7 - 15/09/2009 08:13 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I finally decided to sleep with my boyfriend. It was my first time and I was really nervous so when he was being all romantic with candles and wine I went a bit overboard and drank too much. I passed out. I woke up a few hours later, still a virgin and in a puddle of my own wee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 945

You deserved it 34 584

By sadinmass - 13/11/2010 13:24 - United States

Today, it was my 21st birthday. I had a simple party with my boyfriend, with just a cake and a bottle of red wine. My boyfriend managed to get so drunk that he danced naked for 10 minutes, then told me I'm hideously obese but that he loves me anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 574

You deserved it 5 767

By anon - 20/08/2012 05:00 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my boyfriend got a hotel room with a jacuzzi, drinks, and tickets to Six Flags for my birthday. He is currently passed out drunk on the other side of the bed, cursing me out in his sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 682

You deserved it 2 662

Next

Top comments

rotflqtms_ 21

Wednesday 30 May 2012 12:05

Wow, how romantic... Dead pets and crying...

KBeatz 5

Wednesday 30 May 2012 12:08

OP: "Now that I see you naked, it reminds me of my dead dog!" T_T

Comments

bagelpie 6

Wednesday 6 June 2012 3:15

How romantic O_o

lottie333 0

Saturday 9 June 2012 1:00

aw :(

hqbrat 8

Tuesday 12 June 2012 4:41

Well at Keats your closer than ever now ;)

listofrandom 13

Tuesday 12 June 2012 20:02

Oh god, I don't know why this made me laugh so hard. I feel so bad, but it's just too funny.

PreciousJewel13 3

Sunday 17 June 2012 7:45

now that is funny! :) best thing i heard all day.

savvy711 1

Saturday 14 July 2012 6:49

This made me laugh so hard.

JessicaaBaril 0

Friday 27 July 2012 5:50

This really cracked me up hahahaha

Fellsnows 5

Sunday 5 August 2012 18:21

Love is in the air

DinosaursAreCute 0

Thursday 9 August 2012 1:23

Lmfao XD Omg

Noonespeciall 1

Friday 17 August 2012 10:11

That's the funniest thing I've read. Not to mention adorable.

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Keywords

Dreams Jealousy Love Geek Gamers Video games Kids AITA Parents Family Gun control Animals Relatable Money Amazon Annoying Birthday Cute Weird Awkward Health Abuse Scams Social Media Mysterious Miscellaneous Friends School Education Anger issues

The Top

Today, I was driving to visit my parents for the first time in two years. After spending about $4000 to make sure my car wouldn't break down on the journey, around the halfway point, the front tire popped and the engine blew out. I'm about 5 states away from both my parents and my home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 732

You deserved it 490

Today, I got stuck in an elevator. The help-line told me, "Don't touch the door. We'll be there soon". Two hours later, I had a headache, my legs were stiff, and my date must've thought I stood her up. The tech finally arrived, pries the door open, then rudely asked, "Why didn't you do that yourself?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 453

You deserved it 3 567

The Top

Today, I was cutting the grass when I saw a man staring at me from my neighbor's garage. This went on for 5 minutes until I finally yelled, "Hello?" There was no response, and I was creeped out, so I called my neighbor. It was a life-sized Paul McCartney cutout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 966

You deserved it 36 388

Today, my supposed "best friend" started going out with the girl I'd just split up with, immediately after she said she wanted to see other people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 946

You deserved it 90

Today, I was offered to attend a Buddhist ceremony by one of my regular customers. Not wanting to offend the couple, I made an excuse about have a project for oceanography. Surprise, the husband is an oceanographer and wants to help me with my imaginary project. Karma much? FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 438

You deserved it 51 071

Today, I was walking down my road in the hill-country of Texas, when I spotted something shiny buried in the dirt. Thinking it could be something interesting, I picked it up, and, after turning it over numerous times in my hand, realized that it was, in fact, an old silver bullet vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 096

You deserved it 1 057

Today, my boss asked me to pick up some supplies for a presentation. I entered the store in the middle of an armed robbery, was knocked to the floor, and had my cash, phone and credit cards stolen. When I told my boss the story, she said, "So were you able to get the binder clips?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 444

You deserved it 3 388

Today, I had my first job interview in months. The guy chuckled mockingly at my master's degree in philosophy and wound up admitting that he had no idea why I'd even been selected to be interviewed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 256

You deserved it 3 733