Health: Hygienic

Hygienic

By imfullthanks - 14/03/2009 23:06 - Norway

Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "How did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?" She yelled from the other room, "You know that little plate with the red stripe?" I was eating off it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 668

You deserved it 7 657

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Same thing different taste

By missy - 09/03/2009 22:54 - United States

Today, my mother told me she needed a urine sample to send in to the doctors to test for any allergies. I did what she had asked and went to my room. I came down stairs later and found her in the bathroom putting my pee on a pregnancy test stick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 418

You deserved it 8 666

I've known for ages

By Crap - 28/01/2010 05:01 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 077

You deserved it 7 179

Revenge is sweet

By Anonymous - 12/10/2013 22:03 - Iceland - Akranes

Today, my mom was acting really pissy, and I couldn't help but mutter that she must be on her period. Five hours later, I'm glued to the toilet with my phone, because she went all out for revenge and spiked my dinner with some hellishly potent kind of laxative. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 257

You deserved it 27 795

By Nick - 13/08/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 404

You deserved it 147 086

By RIP Turd (peacebeuponit) - 17/12/2014 18:47 - Lebanon - Beirut

Today, I took a crap. When I stood up to admire my handiwork and flush, I noticed blood-red everywhere in the toilet. I freaked out like a little girl, thinking I was bleeding out of my ass. Then I noticed the ketchup packets my roommate had slipped under the seat to prank me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 887

You deserved it 6 630

Well did you?

By Kagura - 02/06/2010 15:05 - Turkey

Today, I went shopping with my mother. I needed to use the toilet, so entered a restaurant. After I left the toilet, my mother, who was near the restaurant's entrance, called out and asked, "Did you flush it?" Everyone heard her. And I'm 22 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 337

You deserved it 3 810

Experimental

By AshleyP - 04/04/2014 14:17 - United Kingdom

Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark, only to discover it was poop. After further investigation, I found out my younger sister had been wearing them and "experimenting". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 444

You deserved it 4 538

Leave me alone

By emoflowers - 10/04/2012 02:51 - United States - Amarillo

Today, my mother made me see the doctor to see if I had irritable bowel syndrome, on the account of how often I go to the restroom. I then had to admit I only go in there to get away from my family. My doctor thought it was hilarious. My mom didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 518

You deserved it 3 340

By cjay2200 - 28/08/2011 21:25 - United Kingdom

Today, my son was eating a plum. I was busy in the kitchen, and he came running in saying "Mummy my plum is wet", I told him it was fine and bit a bit off to prove it. He looked at me and said "No Mummy! Can you wash it please, I dropped it in my potty". I feel ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 167

You deserved it 9 913

Poop

By Roma - 16/06/2017 14:00 - United States - Chevy Chase

Today I asked my mother-in-law to borrow a plunger, so she asked what I needed it for. "Poop," I replied. "I've told you this before," she huffed, "you have to poop a little and then flush, poop a little and flush. You can't go all at once." I can't even shit right for this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 389

You deserved it 543

commonsense 0

Sunday 15 March 2009 9:52

so how did the beef taco taste?

fingersforteeth 0

Sunday 15 March 2009 10:16

did someone order the poo poo platter? ha

Comments

knitbitch 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 2:13

Holy mother of merde, that is nasty!

Kurlzz 0

Monday 23 March 2009 4:50

Ewww, hahaha! Poor you.

Aish_fml 0

Monday 30 March 2009 6:46

Even if this is fake, you have to admit it's a pretty good effing story. HIlarious...

ignoramoose 0

Friday 3 April 2009 3:58

I vote it was sarcasm/payback for you even asking since even if she didn't know you were eating off of it right then, it sounds like it was said to deliberately disgust you. Also, why would you even ask that while eating in the first place?

rosemaryblack 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 4:19

nastttttyyyyyyyyyyyyy

meleecow 0

Friday 17 April 2009 20:47

Hmmm... you dont give stool samples from home, nor do you poop on a plate to give one fail

LoveToSmile101 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 16:39

LMFAO..that's disgusting. Poor you..FYL indeed!

R3nesmee 0

Wednesday 10 June 2009 23:06

WOW. I would have Killed my mom If it were me.

CodeMan16 0

Friday 26 June 2009 22:23

so many questions #42 the first that comes to mind is that i really didnt know that it was an extremely common thing for a mom to see her fully grown son/daughter naked to the extent that you could say "I'm not too fond of her seeing me naked"