Today, I was preparing to leave my campsite when I noticed that my neighbors were trying to put up a canopy. I walked over and said, "Do you need a hand?" Then I noticed the man had a prosthetic hook. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a co-worker and I walked out of our office at the same time. He got in his car, which was parked right out front. I asked him what I had to do to get a sweet parking spot like that. He rolled up his pant leg and show me his prosthesis. He was in the handicapped spot. FML
Today, I was getting out of my car, when my new neighbor asked if I'd help him unhitch a trailer. On my way over, he said, "Oh never mind, I thought you were a boy." I am a boy. FML
Today, I told a guy he should be ashamed of himself for parking in a handicapped space. He hit me with his prosthetic leg. FML
Today, I met my new neighbors. The first thing they did was build a fence. FML
Today, I spent hours decorating my front yard for Halloween. When I stepped back to admire my work, the wind blew all the decorations into my neighbor's yard. Of course, they're currently away on a long vacation and I can't get to my stuff, so… you're welcome, I guess! FML
Today, my boyfriend and best friend decided to "help" by assembling my new front porch while I was away. Ecstatic, they displayed their handiwork. It's charming how the porch is precariously balanced, it leans in such a way that it appears it will fall over if you walk through the front door. FML
Today, our company did a photo-session for the website. The photographer was limping, and I immediately asked what's wrong with him. Then I noticed he was on a prosthetic. FML
Today, I went to the beach. While I was enjoying the sun, an old man with prosthetic leg and no clothes on sat next to me. He took off his fake leg and put it behind his head. Then he opened his legs revealing his "stuff." I will never unsee this. Ever. FML
Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML
Today, I was working on a client's roof. Some neighborhood kids thought it would be hilarious if they knocked over my ladder. I was stuck on this roof in serious heat. I caught the attention of a pedestrian to come to my rescue. It was a little old lady. She gave me the finger and left. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Did he say "Yes?" In either case, it looks like you're... ...on the hook to help him put up the canopy.
BurnInDemonFire 39
He's missing a hand, and now you've put your foot in your mouth you're basically on equal terms. Just remember to chew before you swallow.
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Comments (2)
RichardPencil 32
Did he say "Yes?" In either case, it looks like you're... ...on the hook to help him put up the canopy.
BurnInDemonFire 39
He's missing a hand, and now you've put your foot in your mouth you're basically on equal terms. Just remember to chew before you swallow.