Today, I horribly lost a game of basketball against my dad. It wouldn't have been so humiliating if he hadn't been piss drunk at the time. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I caught my dad sneaking a drink of whiskey outside, shortly before my wedding. I asked if he was seriously getting drunk at a time like this. He looked at me and scoffed, "It's the only way I'm gonna get through this stupid shit." FML
Today, my older brother said that if he beat me in a game of NBA 2k17, he would get to keep my PS4. I beat him so badly that he got angry and destroyed my PlayStation. FML
Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML
Today, I realized that my 3 year-old son, who is being potty trained, has better aim standing up to pee than his 30 year-old father. FML
Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML
Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML
Today, I was arguing with my dad. I called him a geriatric fool. He replied with, "Well at least I know who my biological father is." I have no idea if he's joking. FML
Today, my dad has decided to that as a New Year's resolution, he's going to strive to wear pants less often. It's only been an hour and I can already tell it's going to be a long year. FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML
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Top comments
xlord 27
Well hopefully he was too drunk to remember kicking your ass.
ladytigerhunts 20
#3: The most wtf reply I've ever seen.
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Comments (40)
Okamichu 21
That really sucks DX
vikky538 29
may be the reason you lose because you are sober..go drink some beer and play again...
mchmelev1993 10
He should of offered a beer for your misery pshh shame on him! Sharing is caring
worldclassrager 41
Is he also good at the piano? (Family guy) Literal comment- Well it's sometimes interesting how some people do better drunk at things than others
fmlrulesBolt 14
Get drunk yourself
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Big deal. It's a stupid pointless game anyway, and your life is hardly ruined for losing a meaningless game to your drunk dad. Unless it's your career, it shouldn't matter. You were playing for fun, not money (I hope). If this is how you react to losing a stupid game, how are you going to handle a real problem?
Morokei 10
All he did was post this on FML. It never said that he was completely broken up by this, he just wanted to share this story on this site.
KatyLarae 13
At least he won't remember schooling you....
Manosapo 18
Some drunk people become super humans