I'm so sorry for you loss. When I was 20, I thought 30 was old. Then when I was 30, I thought 40 was old. Once I got to 40, I thought 50 was old. But at 50, I actually started to feel old, and one of the reasons was because I had buried enough friends and acquaintances-- not of old age, but the cumulative odds of dying of *something* over the course of several decades is non-trivial, and it happened to one of my friends when I was in my 30s, and three more when I was in my 40s. The years go by faster and faster, and it would take me the rest of my life just to read all the books and play all the games I've accumulated so far, never mind all the traveling my wife and I want to do. I feel you. Take good care of your body, and we may have a few more good decades in us yet.

Down the memory hole.