Today, I shaved for the first time. My mum gave me a razor and I spent about 20 minutes trying to use it. I gave up, yelling, "FUCK IT!" and put it back on the shelf. It fell, and as it hit the floor, a lid fell off. I'd tried to shave with a sheathed razor for 20 minutes. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I decided to conquer my fear of blades, and tried shaving my legs with a razor. I sat on the side of my bathtub and wet my legs, but some of the water splashed. I slipped on it and fell back, hitting my head on the tile wall and slicing my leg open at the same time. FML
Today, I shaved my legs for the first time in three weeks. It took half an hour, three disposable razors, and I cut my legs up so badly they look worse then they did when they were hairy. FML
Today, I bought a new electric razor. I tried it, and washed it. I started to shake it in order to get rid of the water. It was pretty slippery, and it exploded onto the floor of my bathroom. The warranty doesn't cover this, I guess. FML
Today, it turned out the razor I used for manscaping wasn't as new and sharp as I'd thought. My entire crotch is now overcome with an unfathomable amount of razor burn. FML
Today, my electric razor fell flat right after I had finished with my first cheek. And of course I don't have a manual one. FML
Today, I shaved my legs. It's been so long since I've shaved that my razor broke. FML
Today, I got an electric shaver hoping that it would reduce the risk of cutting myself than shaving with a manual one. However, I cut myself opening the plastic package with the shaver inside. FML
Today, I tried shaving my bikini area for the first time. I ended up cutting myself several times. I now have impressive razor burn, and it's incredibly painful to even wear pants. FML
Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML
Today, I was shaving my underarms, when I heard a noise. I quickly turned my head to see what it was and got the razor caught in my hair. I'm now sporting a very attractive bald patch. FML
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Top comments
wvcheesehead 13
Ask your mother for birth control also please, for the sake of the planet.
mmazzaa 16
The times that you wasted ..... Could of went to your garden and grow so much potato and carrots
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Comments (54)
militarybrat 21
FYL because your mom should have helped if it was your first time.
buttnut 1
growing up is hard
seriouslygrowup 11
it's a sign that you're not supposed to have the ability to shave yet ;)
sammii_kna 18
Haha this is something i would do.. I'm honestly surprised it has not.
RageWolf16 31
The Venn diagrams of "old enough to say ****" and "young enough to shave for the first time" are two circles that don't even touch
limabeans101029 21
Not necessarily. Not everyone starts shaving when they're very young. I have a friend who didn't start until she was about 16 or 17 because her body hair was so thin and blonde that you couldn't really see it anyway. I started when I was 13 and, even though it might not seem appropriate for 13 year olds to be swearing, most of them do
swoldier04 6
I call bullshit, no one is that stupid
Omak 10
Do NOT reproduce! I repeat, do NOT reproduce!
mykeenblade 7
Chill dudes, maybe it was early in the morning and the poor dude wasn't awake. Then again, maybe not, but still.
sarah2453 17
What kind of parent hands their child a razor and let's them go wild all on their own? And OP seems too young to be shaving if you don't understand that you should be able to see the blades and that the cover slides off.... You also seem too young to be swearing. Another bad judgement by your mother to be letting you scream out a swear word if you're just starting to shave which is usually younger, she should be teaching you better.
MatthewWelch15 3
What were u shaving?