Today, I realized I have two guys interested in me. One is a boring lump who has a good job and takes me to nice places, and the other is a hilarious hot sexy goofball who can't hold down a job and shamelessly mooches off me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a date with the hottest guy I've ever met. He is also rich and successful, and would probably be perfect for me, if only he could stop bragging about it. FML
Today, I asked out the man of my dreams. He's smart, attractive, and has a steady job. Imagine my surprise when he accepted. Then imagine my surprise when he followed up with, "Hah, just kidding. You're fucking BORING!" FML
Today, it seems that my four previous girlfriends all left me because they found better, more attractive, more wealthy, more interesting men. My entire love life feels like I’m the warm up act for the main event of other dudes getting laid. FML
Today, I met my ex from the college, and he invited me to dinner. Back then, he was rude and a bit abusive, but I agreed anyway. The man I saw today is loving, caring and fun, with a good job, and I really liked his wife. On the other hand, I'm between jobs, and my relationship's turned into the utter bore. FML
Today, I had lunch with a couple of my friends and a guy I like. Another guy I have a crush on came and ate with us too. After lunch, one of the guys I have a crush on told me the other guy I like is sexy. FML
Today, I realized I have to choose between being unemployed or putting up with my perverted boss who desperately wants me. I'm a guy and so is he. FML
Today, I woke up beside a disgusting guy I didn't know. He told me he was the best friend of the handsome guy I was hitting on yesterday evening. I can't remember at which point I got mislead into bringing the wrong one home. FML
Today, I'm dating the perfect guy. He's smart, considerate, charming, funny, good looking and we have a ton of interests in common. He also can't get it up. At all. FML
Today, after months of hardcore flirting with this incredibly attractive guy, he invited me to hang out. At which point he introduced me to his boyfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend of over a year and I were discussing how neither of us is the other's usual "type". I explained that I usually go for insular asshole types and then asked him what made me different from his usual choices. He said "Oh, well, I usually go for the attractive ones." FML
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Top comments
Hangryko 32
You ... seriously can't decide? F the successful guy's life for choosing you. Grow up.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
So you shamelessly mooch off the first guy when he "takes me to nice places" even though you clearly have little interest in him, and then complain about someone doing it to you? You don't deserve either of them.
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Comments (8)
Hangryko 32
You ... seriously can't decide? F the successful guy's life for choosing you. Grow up.
eellik 12
Since you seem to see relationship as transactional only, the 2nd guy is perfect for you. On the other hand, maybe try to find someone you actually love instead, because it seems like you've never experienced that. What you describe certainly isn't love.
DLBL 23
Please use lots of birth control if you sleep with Mr. Sexy Goofball. Also, there are more fish in the sea.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
So you shamelessly mooch off the first guy when he "takes me to nice places" even though you clearly have little interest in him, and then complain about someone doing it to you? You don't deserve either of them.
JackWood 21
And you must be Goldilocks. Sounds like you shouldn't date either one
idragosani 17
I'd go with the boring lump. He has prospects and may be more interesting than you think, and sounds like he treats you well. The second option... he's an adult child and you will be stuck "babysitting" him for the rest of his life.
sirrubberduckie 37
Find one guy you like instead of two you clearly don't respect.
JasonThorn 23
Well, at least she's correctly identified her F Buddy and her Backup Plan.