Today, I finally mustered up the guts to ask this girl I like to dinner and a movie. She agreed on the terms that she could bring someone, and I'd said it wouldn't be a problem. When I met up with her a few hours later, I found out she'd brought her boyfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the girl I've had a crush on for a year finally said she'd go out with me. On the way over to pick her up, she called me and said she couldn't go because she was going out to dinner with her ex-boyfriend to talk things over. She asked if she could use the reservations I had made. FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask my crush to a movie. What I didn't realise is that she would bring a "friend" along, and that I would have to sit next to them making out for 2 hours. FML
Today, I got a text from a girl that I've had a crush on for a long time, asking me out to dinner. I agreed and went to the restaurant. Not long afterwards, I got text from her saying something had come up, so she couldn't make it. As I was walking back to my car, I saw her walk into the same restaurant with another guy. FML
Today, after finally getting a date with the girl I like, she invited her new boyfriend along as well. I ended up paying for their first date. FML
Today, I was on a date with a girl I've had feelings for since I was 14 (I'm 22). I took her out to dinner, then to a movie that we both liked and had a few drinks afterwards. I thought it was going really well until I was driving her home and she asked to be dropped off at her boyfriend's house. FML
Today, I asked the girl I like if she wanted to go to the movies, she said yes and I said I'd let her pick the movie. She picked the movie, "Just Friends". FML
Today, I went to the movies with a girl I like, then we went to grab a bite afterwards. She spent most of the time telling me how much she dislikes my best friend because he hooked up with a new girl. I then found out the two had been "talking" for a while. FML
Today, after what I thought was several weeks of flirting with a coworker, I asked her out on a date. She asked if it could be a double date, and I said yes. I brought a friend, she brought her husband. FML
Today, I asked out a girl I like to a movie. She said "I hate babysitting." FML
Today, I went on a date with the girl of my dreams. Her boyfriend, who she said she'd broken up with, was at the same restaurant with another girl. She screamed at him for ten minutes, then they started making out, and left together. The girl he was with looked at me and said "Eww", then went to hit on another guy. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
I hope you paid for both of them. That's the least you do when your Gaydar malfunctions, and you hit on a breeder.
nightlilies 0
Clearly the attraction was just superficial, otherwise you would have know that A) not only was she not a lesbian, but B) she had a boyfriend. Get to know someone before you make a move in the future.
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Comments (103)
Rynk95 11
Awww, too bad, man.
NiceGuyz 0
What's Gorramit? And OP you should of made sure you knew who she was bringing or stop her from bringing anyone. Although I am guessing you never had any chance with her. ^NiceGuyz^
tj79 3
good eye Kay. Shining
Draminicaus 0
I saw that one coming, Space Pirate Cowboy. lol I think you should take that as an "It'll never happen" sign.
LetsRollOut 2
Firefly references, ftw.
wtfurcrazy 0
I've seen this fml before...
Prolusive 5
OP is a girl, though.
parksejun 11
Let us have a moment of silence for our brother in the friendzone.
mr_mccarthy 0
haha BURN!
CoachLlama 5
Lesson here. Be a bit more specific about your intentions with "da" ladies. Unless you were looking for some kind of threesome.
roeallen 11
she is a playa
NiceGuyz 0
@4 No a girl cannot be a player only men are able to reach player status. The female equivalent of player is ****. ^NiceGuyz^
nycy 0
Double standards for the win! FLAME-SHIELD
marcranger 29
wrong. men are *****. or wannabe *****, which is even worse.
Justforlolz 14
Depends. You got to admit, no matter which side you are on, you will always be considered sexist.
dragead12 0
or we can, you know, get rid of social stigma for choosing to have casual sex?
McBurgar 0
No, they're filthy filthy ******!
hidingoutt7 0
akwarded
DocBastard 40
Dinner and a movie? What is this, 1967? I thought kids these days go out for PCP and a MMA fight.
dustandashes 0
man u must be one of those old ppl who sit on the porch and talk about the good ol days and how u would never be so rude as kids today. just shut up and yes I realize the irony
DocBastard 40
Damn kid! Get off my comment! And my lawn!
C6Racer 0
Doc never fails. Never. lmao
kayybby 1
I think doc needs to get off the computer every once in awhile.. every one of these I've read had a comment by him on it. I'm 18 and never sit around on the internet near as much as this person evidently does.
DocBastard 40
I think you need to mind your own goddamn business. Who the **** cares how old you are and how much time you spend here? The way my schedule works gives me a few minutes here and there through the day, and some days (like today), I pull a 24 hour shift. And I happen to have my iPhone with me constantly, so I pull it out and look on here. Contrary to what you may believe, I don't comment on every FML. Go back and check if you don't believe me. Wait, why the hell am I justifying myself to a ******* pissant like you? I have an idea- why don't you go place a plastic bag tightly over your head and test the hypothesis that humans are aerobic organisms. Do it now.
Draminicaus 0
That's gotta be the funniest insult I've ever heard. I applaud you, sir.
DocBastard 40
You're right, chaos. Absolutely right. I guess I felt the need to defend my honor or something. I'll try to keep it simple.
GTmustang07 0
dude, Doc does not even look old enough to know her multiplication table ;) please do not take that seriously. I know you fml'ers out there do that some times lol
C6Racer 0
I like chicken.
perdix 31
I hope you paid for both of them. That's the least you do when your Gaydar malfunctions, and you hit on a breeder.
Sholloway 0
It's truly a sad lesbian who lacks a gaydar. :(
Moe954 0
Well that was mean ...
breenntt 0
I sense a threesome.
iheartglasses 0
Thats pretty mean on her part. Why did she say a friend and not mention that it was her boyfriend. She should have picked up you were asking you out and, instead of embarrassing you, let you down easy
roobear 2
She said she was bringing someone, not a friend. OP definitely should have asked who. If you're asking someone on a date (especially when it's the same sex) you need to be a bit more clear than normal, I think.