Creepypasta, Stalker and Miscellaneous: Creeped out

Creeped out

By emoney - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 650

You deserved it 3 776

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Same thing different taste

I hate myself

By trixanne - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Sydney

Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I left my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 732

You deserved it 3 964

Not a morning person at the best of times

By shouldhavestayedinbed - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my doorbell rang while I was still in bed. I leapt out and immediately got a severe cramp in one leg, then, staggering around trying to throw some clothes on, I scraped the other leg badly enough to draw blood. When I got to the door there was nobody there, just a parcel on the doorstep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 706

You deserved it 2 191

By Myriam - 18/06/2012 16:05 - Maldives - Male

Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 875

You deserved it 3 413

It's sus to us

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - New Orleans

Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 452

You deserved it 4 508

The ending of Lost explained

By Morgan - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I lost my dog. I looked around my neighborhood for hours, and found him under my bed asleep when I got home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 867

You deserved it 30 081

By paranoid neighborhood - 27/11/2013 17:51 - United States - Orlando

Today, I was walking back home from a party, when I received an email from our neighborhood watch. It said to beware, because a "thug-like" stranger with a white shirt and brown hair had entered the neighborhood. My hair is indeed brown and I was wearing a white shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 355

You deserved it 4 230

Red flag

By Kirby - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, as I was walking back to my dorm, I looked down and thought, "I wonder why the ground is wet in just this one spot?" Then I got hit with a water balloon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 216

You deserved it 4 518

WHO ARE YOU?

By Targeted - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Kirkland

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 209

You deserved it 2 902

BIKES?!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I rode my bike to work. Once there, I realized I'd forgotten my bike lock. For fear of it being stolen, I quickly rode home and took my car instead. When I later got home, I realized my bike was missing. Someone stole it from my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 725

You deserved it 6 319

By "ztodaro" - 30/06/2017 20:00

Today, while I was inside a store, I heard a crash. Of course I ignored it because my car was parked. I paid for my items and walked out to see this. Nobody else was around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 890

You deserved it 291

redbluegreen 40

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:52

Get a (big) dog. Change your locks. Buy a shotgun.

lyndis_fml 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 9:53

Well, you do. A golf ball at the door seemed less creepy than a note on your bedside table. Sorry if I scared you.

Comments

DangerousBabee 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 1:44

o.O Stalker much? That's Just Creepy... Oh ;D But Look On Thee Bright Side He Said Yuhr ' Hot

sillylung 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:04

How do we know the original poster is a girl, and not some dude being stalked? In either case, it's creepy!

sovereign_fml 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:40

I'd buy a driver, so you can tee off on his balls if he exists. FYL for sure, :)

SuperSpore 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:58

Follow these steps to stop him: 1. Buy a shotgun. 2. Close the blinds. 3. Change the locks. 4. Get more locks. 5. Get lessons in martial arts. 6. Get more locks. 7. Get a security camera. 8. Get more locks. 9. Board up the windows. 10.Get even MORE locks. 11.Buy an electric fence. 12.Get EVEN MORE locks. 13.Get another electric fence. 14.Call the authorities.

LittleGreenBean 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 3:24

SO Creepy!

FreedomFirst 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 3:51

Buy a handgun and keep it under your pillow. Or if you don't think you can shoot, maybe a brick in a pillowcase would work too. And to #132 - I disagree respectfully. Life isn't worth living if you have to do it like that. I prefer the risks.

TheECP 1

Wednesday 20 May 2009 3:55

Probably a joke, but pretty creepy...

dragonmystik3030 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 4:15

curtains.. close them..

56578 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 4:16

Well, you said between your mat and your steps... so I'm guessing that's outside of your actual apartment. Maybe you need to sleep with your blinds closed? Anyhow, I'd still be extra careful with locking all the windows and doors before you sleep.