By Anonymous - 30/11/2009 02:06 - United States

Today, I spoke with my boyfriend's crazy ex-girlfriend. Actually, she isn't all that crazy. He really did cheat on her with half a dozen other girls. The same girls he's apparently cheating on me with. How do I know for sure? Thank you crazy ex for his email passwords. FML
I agree, your life sucks 49 739
You deserved it 5 246

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Your boyfriend sounds a lot like my ex. Who told all our mutual friends that I'm a monstrously perverted sexual deviant with "an extensive collection of horse cock dildos and my own personal dungeon". Why? Because I was "mean" to him when he tried to hook up with me after I broke up with him.

lol you do realize that you're going to soon be the crazy ex girlfriend right?


Your boyfriend sounds a lot like my ex. Who told all our mutual friends that I'm a monstrously perverted sexual deviant with "an extensive collection of horse cock dildos and my own personal dungeon". Why? Because I was "mean" to him when he tried to hook up with me after I broke up with him.

They make horse cock dildos? FML is a banquet of knowledge apon which i feast and regularly throw back up.

life_goes_onnn 0


I agree Peroxide.

They make whale cock dildos.

thanks crazy ex!

Peroxide, apparently you've never heard of Bad Dragon [shudders] Only masochists roam there, I'm sure!

Where'd you get your horsecock dildos? I want to get one for my girlfriend for when I go out of town.

Actually we were looking at that site for lols the other day and the small sizes were all under six inches. Weird, but not particularly pain-inducing.

Whales don't have cocks.

They do until the Whalecock Dildo Company gets to them.

monkeygrrlee 0

lol phatdaddy 

My ex calls me a crazy bitch because I didn't approve of his alcoholism and because I was the first girl to dump him. I guess I was silly to not want to be with someone who cheated on me with multiple people.

kryxen 14

Lol actually they make every kind of dildo, including dragon. Look up bad dragon dildo.

stalker! but still fyl

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She obviously cant trust him..?

#129 I bet you're just like OP's exboyfriend.

lol you do realize that you're going to soon be the crazy ex girlfriend right?

crzyry 6

I'm gonna guess he's an exboyfriend now? Maybe you and his other ex should date. :-)

lyndis_fml 0

Any guy who says his ex was "crazy" is to be avoided. He will say the same about you.

No. My ex faked being pregnant to test my dedication to her and see how I felt about abortion. That's crazy shit. My other ex's are all good people.

AndelleRae 9

That's not really a fair statement. My boyfriend's most recent ex IS crazy, to the point where she and her new boyfriend tried running him off the highway a couple of weeks ago. Bear in mind this was 6 months after they'd broken up, and they hadn't said one word to each other in that time period. As soon as he started dating me, she started trying to get him fired (they both worked at the same place) and she spread rumors that he beat her all the time. Some guys really do just have crazy exes. In this case, though, you are correct. It sucks for the OP that all of his friends will take her (now ex, I hope) boyfriend's word for it. OP, FYL for having a douchebag for a boyfriend.

sarcdude 3

not completely true. My ex girlfriend wanted to do phone sex in less than a week. It was a long distance relationship and I was only 17. I refer to her as "crazy." EDIT: The above beats this completely.

sarcdude 3

@Andelle because editing expired: wow, how does your boyfriend survive? yeesh. Goddamn.

Phone sex? In less then a week? At seventeen? SURELY YOU JEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sarcdude 3

No. No I do not.

sarcdude 3

wait just remembered.... I was SIXTEEN O_O

YOU WERE ONLY A CHILD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sarcdude 3

yes. Yes I was. O_O

AndelleRae 9

@ sarcdude, she ended up getting fired from the place they work because they caught her chasing him out of the parking lot on security cameras. He hasn't heard from her since, so hopefully she's done being psycho.

sarcdude 3

well serves her right.

I'm sure she's just plotting her comeback/revenge.

AndelleRae 9

I know it's not right, but I laughed at that, mangocherrypie. We're keeping an eye out for any strange goings on, though, just in case she decides she wants to try and kill him again.

sounds like It's Always Sunny, huh. xx

That is crazy!

My boyfriend's ex is actually insane. That's me saying it, not him. First off, after two months, she told him she was in love with him and that she wanted to marry him and have children. She called him an "asshole" when he disagreed. She used to bring knives and razors to school and say she was gonna cut him with them. She tied him to her bed and punched him in the face when he said he didn't want to sleep with her. She told him that she had fallen in love with some other dude while she was still dating him, and he said that that was fine with him because he'd started getting feelings for me, and if she didn't want him, then they might as well break up. She then started going crazy because he wanted to leave her, even though SHE said it first. Not crazy enough yet? A couple weeks after they broke up, she lied and told him she'd tried to commit suicide, then asked for him back and didn't understand when he said no. She got another boyfriend and used to moan my boyfriend's name during sex with him (I'll point out that her and my boyfriend never did anything while together.) She made a whole YouTube video about how she still loves him (after about a year of them breaking up and me being with him) Even now, after three years, she still gets all emotional and annoying when she's around him, and ESPECIALLY when I'm there. So yeah she's actually crazy

Thatk1ddd 0

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it's an FML because of the cheating ex. that was the point.

tHEkAYjAy 0

This comment makes no sense

AntiChrist7 0

Girls only love assholes. YDI

sarcdude 3

Well damn. On the other hand you lose credibility for looking through his password. If I had a woman, then if she's cheating on me she's cheating on me. I won't lower myself to her level by looking through her private stuff.

sarcdude 3

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Yes yes, never invade someone's privacy. Just wait it out while he invades someone else's privates, even if you have people telling you he is cheating. You will eventually find out by him when he gets you both pregnant. Because, really, it is the only right thing to do!

theblazian 0

Sarcdude beleves the only good way to find out if someone is cheating on you is either A) after catching a VD, B) after a pregnancy you had no part in, C) being broken up with, or D) finding them tied up on your bed with a member of the opposite sex. Mind you he also considers D) to be snooping if you don't knock 5 times and give them a 10 minute leeway.

Polionixon 2

i'd rather find out earlier into the relationship though rather then later... feelings do grow over time.. could you imagine how it would make her feel if she found out like 6months or a year down the road or even more. That would be horrible :(

sarcdude 3

well I agreed with C and D... the snooping accusation might be a teensy bit of a stretch though. just saying it's not cool to have to look through someone's texts, emails, whatever. honestly if they're cheating on you, you deserve better anyway.

athame1983 0 would u know if she was cheating on u? telepathy?

sarcdude 3

something like that, actually. "Are you cheating on me?" *takes a minute or a while to respond, or other various "I'm totally lying" signals* you know, body language. just saying I don't think it's right to look through people's stuff.

theblazian 0

And if they are a good liar or you can't pick up on said body signals than you are thoroughly fucked. Good plan.

MiseryAlice 0

In this case, I think she had probable cause to go through his email. His ex girlfriend told her that he was cheating, and he had probably been acting suspicious. Normally you shouldn't invade someones privacy, but if you have a really good reason to theres not much else you can do.

sarcdude 3

gah, now I'm not sure. some IRL agree with me that it's never ok but then again if he had been acting suspicious that she would have clear reason to believe he had been cheating... I'm just against going through people's stuff but I guess in that case I'll let up a little-in the case that she'd have probable cause to suspect it. =/ Then there's that still small voice that tells me to stick to my position XD

"it's not cool to HAVE TO look through..." No, you're right, it's not. It would be nice if we could trust our partners not to cheat on us, eh?

hotcaligirl 10

Yeah........ So more time could have gone by and she could have wasted more time and money and risk of her own HEALTH and WELL-BEING bc of her dirt bag ex?? I mean, he could have given her HIV, AIDS, Chlamydia, etc.. The scenario probably went something like this.... Crazy Ex GF: Please believe me, I'm not crazy, I just don't want the same thing happen to you. Here are his passwords, look for yourself. The evidence is right there. Curiosity got the best of her and she looked. Fuck that, that's how men get away with shit like that. There comes a time in every relationship that if you truly trust someone and are faithful, you give all your passwords and share all of your info. There is no hiding shit. I'm all for privacy, but there's no need to HIDE anything from the person you are planning on SHARING your life with. Otherwise, there is no trust and in my opinion the relationship needs to end. He is the one that deceived her and then spread lies about his ex-gf, who was probably just a girl that fell for his horse-shit, yet you're the one saying it's wrong to go through his media that he used to lie to her? Please- he knew the consequences- there are good and bad ones to EVERY action. Personally, I'm glad she looked.. if I were her, I'd rather look like a crazy ex gf than a possible STD-filled fool.

#135 you know that you can't get AIDS right away? And you know that HIV is the virus and it's called AIDS as soon as you suffer from AIDS-related diseases? In your comment it sounds like they are two cometely different diseases.

The safety word while in the sex dungeon is banana.

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