Today, I got a knock on my door at 3 a.m. Turns out, if I ignore my mother long enough, she will assume I have died and will call the cops. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother took a bunch of sleeping pills, then went driving. I followed her and dialed 911. Now she thinks that I was "trying to get her arrested," and she refuses to talk to me ever again. FML
Today, someone knocked at my door. I saw it was my Mom, so I flattened myself against the door and tried to be as quiet as possible. I pulled my phone out and almost had silenced it before she called and heard the ringtone through the door. I had to invite her in and hear the usual "get married and have kids." FML
Today, my mom is in the hospital and I'm sitting by the phone in case anyone calls with news. Each time the phone rings, I bolt upright to answer it. So far I've been woken up by two telemarketers, three robo-calls, and some old lady asking for Doris, who doesn't live here. I can't turn my phone off. FML
Today, I stopped by my elderly mother’s house to drop off some groceries. I decided to clean the place while I was there, just to be nice. In true Three Bears fashion, I fell asleep on the couch. I was awoken by a police officer pointing his gun at me. My mom woke up and thought I was a burglar. FML
Today, my mom barged into my room at three in the morning, demanding to know where I'd been. I'd been in my room sleeping since ten o'clock. In that time she had called the police, all of my friends, and my ex-boyfriend, asking if I was with them. FML
Today, I was so exhausted that I slept through my phone ringing, and later my doorbell ringing. My psycho mom freaked out, and thinking I was in trouble, broke a window to get inside. This all happened before 7 a.m. FML
Today, after getting home from a twelve-hour shift at work, I got into bed and passed out. My mother soon woke me up, screaming that she could tell I was "fake sleeping" and ignoring her lecture on how I need to stop being so "lazy". FML
Today, my phone rang for the first time in four days. It was my mom. She dialed the wrong number. FML
Today, my mother woke me up by loudly vacuuming the house. I had to work the next morning, so I asked her what she was thinking. She told me that if I was really tired and needed sleep, I wouldn't have woken up. It was 3 AM. FML
Today, I got home from work to find the door locked and dead bolted, so I used my cell to call the home phone while banging on the door. My stepmom came out of her room, looked right at me, laughed, and went back to bed. This is the fifth time she's done this. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
When did she call the cops? Why would they show up at 3am? I mean, if you were really dead, you'd still be dead, at lets say... Nine. In the afternoon. (;
Ashleyxphobia 0
At least she cares.
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Comments (103)
Mister_Kitty 0
That's what you get for breast feeding until the age of 17.
I_iz_epic 0
"she will assume I have died and call the cops" LMAO!! Funny how that's the only thing she thinks of.
lukeecharms90 0
sounds like boyfriends crazy russian mom, all i have to say, make her stop before it puts stress on a relationship
Miss_Makay 0
at least she cares because some people who dont have a mom who would call. let along call the cops to make sure their child is ohkay, i mean u cant blame her shes the one who brought you into this world. its bettter that shes over protecting then not caring at all.
Violet_Grace 0
Since I moved away, my mother has done that same thing twice.
jeniilouise 0
why didn't the OP's mum just go to his/her house and check for herself?!
Hurt16 0
your mom is sooo funny my mom can't wait to get me up n out to college lol
haribo158 0
feel your pain mate- we love em bt stop calling the cops!
kitxxkat1408 0
9 months for nothing... way to go
NekoHakase 0
Ugh, cut the cord already, Woman. I can't stand over-protective mothers.