Today, I noticed a disgusting, cheesy smell and spent all day wondering what it was. I later found out that it wasn't coming from my feet, but from my belly button. My surgery wound got infected. I'm a germaphobe. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I learned how awful intertrigo smells. I spent a ton of money and years of my life to become a health care provider apparently to treat the yeast infection between an obese woman's fat folds. FML
Today, I learned that a innie belly button does not clean itself. I can't begin to describe the horrors I found, after using tweezers to get thirty years worth of "contents" out from inside me. FML
Today, while working at my new job at a surgery center, I noticed how odd it was that the room began to smell like fried chicken. I thought it smelt pretty good, until I learned it was actually the smell of someone getting their ear cauterized. I enjoyed the smell of someone's burning ear flesh. FML
Today, twelve days after stomach surgery, I birthed a left behind, forgotten blood-stained stinky surgical swab from my vagina. I have no idea why it was there in the first place. I feel violated. FML
Today, I walked in the bathroom and smelled a disgusting cheesy smell. I looked at the tub and my boyfriend was furiously scrubbing under his toenails with a nail brush. FML
Today, I found out I have an abscess in my bellybutton which causes me extreme pain and discomfort when I sit down. I am a receptionist. FML
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
Today, I had to finally come to terms with the fact that I am obese when the doctor told me that my weird smell was not an infection but mold growing between my fat rolls. FML
Today, I found out that I have a bacteria causing me to smell bad. For the last three years, strangers would say that I stink, I thought it was because I'm a smoker and they could smell cigarettes from my clothes, only to find out that people could smell my vagina through my pants. FML
Today, I have been home sick and depressed for so long that I just found Oreo crumbs in my belly button. FML
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Top comments
julfunky 29
You’d think a germaphobe would know how to properly care for a healing wound. While an infection doesn’t necessarily mean you didn’t take care of it the fact that you spent the entire day without once caring for your surgery wound does. Hell, I clean my new ear piercings more than you clean your wound.
Felice Godin 19
should have made sure to clean the wound so it wouldnt get infected
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Comments (2)
Felice Godin 19
should have made sure to clean the wound so it wouldnt get infected
julfunky 29
You’d think a germaphobe would know how to properly care for a healing wound. While an infection doesn’t necessarily mean you didn’t take care of it the fact that you spent the entire day without once caring for your surgery wound does. Hell, I clean my new ear piercings more than you clean your wound.