Today, a friend of mine was talking about how he'd spent over 30 hours on Call of Duty. I piped up and said "Oh yeah! Well I've spent well over 300 hours on Morrowind! Beat that!" To which he replied, "I've had sex. Beat that!" I couldn't. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his buddies that the main reason he got into video game modding was so he could put a virtual version of me in his games and "shoot the fuck out of that bitch". FML
Today, I beat my old college friend at CoD and mocked him vigorously, to which he replied, “Don’t feel bad for me, I have a hot wife, a baby on the way, and a house I paid off by selling my business. How are you?” I… won a video game. FML
Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML
Today, while in bed with my game-obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML
Today, a friend wanted to show me a game he bragged he was the best at. I beat his score on the first try, and now I have a black eye to prove it. FML
Today, my boyfriend was talking about video games. Bored of the subject, I started kissing his neck and chest in hopes of him to stop talking and getting some action. He did stop, only for him to say about a minute later, "You're lucky my games can't do this." FML
Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML
Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied, "That's OK, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML
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Top comments
Dikkanen 0
Morrowind is AWESOME!
Nothingness1 3
Lol, just lie and say you have too, but it was hot. ;]
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Comments (277)
chexmixbmx 0
what the hell i morrowwind
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I hope that premarital sex comment wasn't directed at me. I've been married for 4 years and was a virgin on my wedding nite. So was my husband. And I've still had 300* hours of sex. Beat that. *approximated number
flinkpamingo 0
That's what you get when you get in a pissing match with someone who can piss higher. You get tinkled on.
andlifesuxagain 0
You are a Virgin because youre fat and no one likes fatties, get off the computer and go exercise. Shit I bet Quagmire wouldnt even do you.
Hermyoni 0
I laughed at this one because I can picture a conversation like this actually taking place. Sucks to be you not getting laid but don't feel bad for playing video games.
jessicax0 0
I would start playing Oblivion if you want sex.. YDI.
gclunax 0
LOLOLOLOL!!
adelaide_evening 0
Just go to the House of Earthly Delights in Balmora. Maybe it'll make up for your lack of a sex life?
Magic_and_Sword 0
The House of Earthly Delights is in Suran >_>
xorgasmicx 0
Not if you have the Balmora Expanded mod. Otherwise, yeah.
TonyHighwind 0
YDI, but I feel your pain my fellow gamer. Put some points in CHA, get some decent threads, and get the hell out there and chat up some chicks.
_THE_MASTER_ 0
300 hours? ive played 400 hours of halo and still get my hands on more bumper than a mechanic, so you got no excuse, man...just get out there and find yourself a nice girl. or dude...whatever your preference is, I'm not going to presume to know...point is, go find someone u like and then get busy....immediately...ok ok, so i probably havent played over 40 hours on halo...you caught me...just go get laid already...
_THE_MASTER_ 0
totally just realized something awesome. if you read this or just about any other comment and imagine Norm MacDonald saying it, it's almost automatically hilarious...try it