Today, I came home to find that my dog had taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He'd also taken a dump in my house shoe. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
Today, I was pet sitting for a friend. As soon as I walked in the door, I stepped in dog poop. I took off my shoes to clean them, then stepped in cat pee in my socks. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML
Today, I woke up and stepped out of bed right into a pile of dog crap. Acting quickly, I jumped on to my other foot, which would have been a great idea, except for this morning there were two piles. FML
Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML
Today, I woke up and got ready for class. I let the dogs outside while I got ready, then brought them back in. As I was putting my shoes on, I felt something warm and mushy. One of my dogs had pooped in my shoe right as I was leaving. I missed the city bus and was late. FML
Today, I came home after working overtime to find my dog whining and giving me her "I need to take a shit" face. After changing my shoes, I came back ready to let her out, only to find her giving me the "I just took a shit on your rug" face. My husband has been home all day. FML
Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML
Today, I found out that my dog is a pro at pooping directly into shoes. FML
Today, I got up at 5am, brushed my teeth, shaved and showered to get ready for work only to step barefoot in a huge pile of dog crap in the middle of my living room floor. I don't own a dog. FML
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Top comments
WeStayCrunk24x7 0
YDI for having house shoes
LilaBear 2
Shoulda trained your dog better.
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Comments (88)
JOD96 0
Lol house shoes...queer
sieht 0
smart dog
b_rad_fml 4
Keep animals outside - especially when you're not home - and they can shit anywhere they want to, but it won't be in your bedroom or house shoes!
bluegreenblue 4
Yeah and freeze to death or be stressed out from all the constant sounds and smells around it. That is a horrible thing to do to your dog and you should never get one. You just don't let your dog be alone all day when you are at work!
rebeccac3 5
Sounds to me like your dog doesn't like you at all:(
mkcherry 14
that dog would never be allowed in my room again. invest in a crate since your dog is a disrespectful mongrel.
Moep20 24
Sorry to say that but I think YDI. Teach your dog where he is allowed to take dumps and take him for walks to do so! He has needs and it looks to me that you just left him alone for a long time!
bluegreenblue 4
And that is why you don't leave your dog home alone for a long time! You deserved it.