Today, a customer came in to the Walmart I cashier at, trying to set me up with her daughter. This isn't the first time she's tried. As she so graciously put it, her daughter "has a thing for the wimpy nerdy types". FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, in a bustling store, a woman waved at me. I didn’t recognize her but waved back enthusiastically and approached her. She frowned and said, “I was waving at my daughter.” Her daughter was behind me. A store clerk saw the whole thing and said, “Happens a lot to lonely people.” FML
Today, I was shopping at Walmart when I ran into this stalker chick. She introduced me to her baby. He's named after me. FML
Today, at Walmart, a lady came up to me and informed me that I "look like the kinda skank that'd give it up on the first date". FML
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML
Today, I was sitting in Walmart when I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with, "You know I'm a guy, right?" FML
Today, while I was shopping, I spotted a lady who had the last of an item I wanted in her cart. She went off to the dressing room, so seeing my opportunity, I went and grabbed it from her cart, and put it in mine. I hadn't noticed her bratty-ass daughter next to the cart, who then yelled, “I saw that! Mommy! Some lady's stealing from your cart!” FML
Today, I was in Walmart with my mom. I was looking for some CDs I wanted and saw a cute guy. Then he nodded at me and as he started to walk towards me, I hear my name being called over the intercom. Apparently, according to my mom, it was time to go. FML
Today, I tried to get a job at Walmart. My mom was the hiring manager. She turned me down due to lack of work experience. FML
Today, I was at work handling the cash register. It wasn't working correctly, so I apologized to the woman I was waiting on for the delay and explained, "The cash register's being a little retarded today." Then I noticed her clearly "special" adult son standing behind her. FML
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Top comments
Ms_ValS 27
Well what are you waiting for OP? If what she's saying is true, this is your chance.
onlychildFTW 34
If she's your type why not? Worst that can happen is you never want to see her again. Although with the mother coming in often that could be awkward.
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Comments (50)
smoothies14 32
Maybe her daughter isn't so bad. After all, not many people care for their in-laws. Don't turn down a potentially great girl just because you met her crazy family first.
JKPwnage 27
"the Walmart I cashier at" I'm so sorry. FYL, OP
wheelchairchick 11
That's rude and crazy
Toab 5
say something like "Well I don't"
EyRaB 17
Her mom sees your demeanor as non-threatening and less likely to hurt her daughter. That's a compliment imo
subzero22 8
Rule #1 of dating don't let any parents set up a date. Or was that rule #2??
RealSuperSand 21
Rule 1: No blind dates Rule 2: No dates setup by parents or siblings, depending on your friends this may also extend over to them. Rule 3: No online dating. Rule 4: Don't be a fool, wrap your tool, For women don't let him drill without your pill. Rule 5: Dress up not down.
band13geek 16
I hit FYL as soon as I read that you worked at Walmart. Sorry, OP! I'm sure the mother will find some other whimpier, nerdier guys for her daugher.
mr_dour 16
OP that's when you say "your daughter looks nice and all, but I'm not into girls with cuntbag mothers."
DLBL 23
Oh no! Doesn't she know you're already married? (wink wink) ?
Wadlaen 24
If you're actually a wimpy nerdy type, this might be your best chance of getting a girl - I'd say you should go for it!