Relatable

Nervous Nelly

By Nervous wreck - 01/07/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, my social anxiety is so bad that the mere thought of talking to anyone, even someone who isn't even real, makes me feel ill and uneasy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 646

You deserved it 204

What the actual…?

By Anonymous - 28/06/2023 22:00

Today, my friend bit me. The first time I said "Ow!" and pushed her away. The third time really hurt, and I got mad and said, "Don't fucking bite me!" and walked away angrily. She chased after me and told me I couldn't be mad at her, then got mad when I wouldn't talk to her. She didn't say sorry once and it started bleeding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 958

You deserved it 130

Playa

By Loner - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Paramus

Today, my buddy congratulated me on getting a girl's phone number written on my arm. I was too embarrassed to tell him it was the number I needed to find my furniture at IKEA. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 405

You deserved it 628

Too awkward to function

By Anonymous - 28/06/2023 06:00 - United States - Stillwater

Today, my sister told me she doesn't think her mom died the way she was told. Uncomfortable, I declined to give my 2 cents on the matter, saying, "I'm sorry" and, "Oh sh!t, sorry." She started gaslighting me about how I wasn't listening, and I told her I was sorry for being a piece of shit, so she then gaslit me about that too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 712

Time to retire

By Should Have Gotten It In Writing - 27/06/2023 15:00 - United States - Morgan Hill

Today, my boss accused me of pursuing a project without his permission that he "wouldn't have approved." I DID get his permission, but he has early Alzheimer's and doesn't remember. He gets upset when anyone suggests that he's misremembering, so all I could do was apologize for not doing something I definitely did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 116

White lie

By Anonymous - 27/06/2023 06:00 - Sweden - Varberg

Today, I went to prom with my two friends. I was ditched by my prom date because he had “other plans.” The weird thing is that when we got to the prom location, I saw him with another date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 104

Take it easy

By Endrit Begolli - 27/06/2023 00:02 - Albania

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months. I was so out of shape that I couldn't even finish my warm-up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 628

You deserved it 260

Monday Monday, so good to me…

By Anonymous - 26/06/2023 18:00 - Australia

Today, my 73 year-old coworker has made a mountain of work for me to plough through due to her incompetence. I had to work through over 400 emails, since she thought unplugging the router would help, and in doing so, I have picked up on hundreds of mistakes she has made with clients, and had to apologise to each one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 128

Hope that's in Fahrenheit

By Cooked alive - 26/06/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, for the first time in at least two years, the temperature exceeded 100 degrees in my area. Except this time, it nearly hit 110. Even with my fan and air conditioner on the highest setting, my room was still burning hot. It's currently 11pm and the temperature has gone down… to 81 degrees. FML

I agree, your life sucks 683

You deserved it 160

Time to tap out

By Staying single - 25/06/2023 22:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, my girlfriend asked why we weren't married yet. I guess I don't find her alcoholism, lack of income, constant insults, references to cheating, and general entitlement behaviour very wifey material. FML

I agree, your life sucks 350

You deserved it 1 188

Technology hate humans

By Helpppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp - 25/06/2023 15:00 - United States

Today, I have a keyboard that randomly jams. If it happens while I'm typing, it will spam said letter for an extended period of time, and nothing I can do makes it stop. It can happen to any key, even the spacebar. It also happens often enough that it goes from mildly convenient to really fucking annoying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 487

You deserved it 329

Thanks for nothing

By BrittanyP - 25/06/2023 12:00

Today, after being so jaded by failed relationships, I'd given a guy who slid into my Facebook Messenger a chance. We'd entered the talking stage, only to be told four months later that he’s found a girlfriend, and no longer wants to continue this interaction and blocked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 291

Dominance

By Anonymous - 24/06/2023 00:02

Today, I have accepted that if I try to spend time with my girlfriend, she will come up with any excuse to avoid me, but when I want to do something by myself, she will be at my elbow every ten seconds, loudly whining that she wants to spend time together and that I'm mean. Talking has yet to fix anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 892

You deserved it 217

America, **** yeah!

By Anonymous - 23/06/2023 10:00

Today, I realized it became my duty as an American to check in on nearby friends and family every time another mass shooting happens. My government refuses to do anything about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 692

You deserved it 384

Move your ass

By Anonymous - 23/06/2023 06:00 - Germany

Today, my boyfriend sits in an empty apartment, complaining about it being a rat hole. HE picked the place, HE refuses my help to decorate, as well as my offer to get his stuff from the old place, and yes, he could totally afford something better. But sure, his life is shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 697

You deserved it 195

East side story

By Anonymous - 23/06/2023 00:02 - India - Prayagraj

Today, I found out that the girl I love loves me back. The two of us are madly in love with each other but we can't do anything about it because our religions and our castes are different. FML

I agree, your life sucks 895

You deserved it 343

Assumptions

By Anonymous - 22/06/2023 15:00

Today, I left my husband in charge of the house for a day. When I returned, I saw him gaming through the window, so I stormed in and yelled at him. Then, my eyes adjusted, and I saw the neatly folded laundry, clean kitchen, vacuumed rugs, and my son, who was asleep until I woke him. Whoops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 2 896

That's not a real thing

By Anonymous - 22/06/2023 12:00 - United Kingdom - Flitwick

Today, after talking to a girl for a little over a month, and both of us saying we liked each other and FaceTiming each other for multiple hours each day, she told me I’m “too easy to talk to” and friendzoned me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 831

You deserved it 158

Poor doggo

By not doing it - 21/06/2023 12:00 - United States

Today, my partner is still pouting because I refused to adopt a “special needs” dog. Never mind that we don’t have the training, experience, equipment, nor financial means to care for an animal with such extensive medical needs, oh no, he just wanted it because it "looked sad.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 949

You deserved it 136

Student life is rough

By Anonymous - 21/06/2023 00:02

Today, I've been feeling like my efforts are never enough. I had 4 exams in one goddamn week, didn't sleep at all for 3 days studying, only to get completely demolished. The teachers put the most complicated problems as if they WANT us to fail. If I fail one class, I'm getting kicked out of my program. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 317

Wire fraud

By Anonymous - 20/06/2023 22:00 - United States - Carson City

Today, with the swipe of a button, my credit union decided that I've moved across the country to an entirely different state. They politely sent me a letter notifying me that 'I' had changed my address, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 110

The One

By NotTheSoulMate - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, even though I don't necessarily believe in soul mates, I found out my wife does. She met hers a few weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 195

You deserved it 3 879

Miscommunication

By Anonymous - 19/06/2023 12:00 - Australia

Today, an actual doctor told me I’ve been “passed around like a bong at a party”, referring to how many doctors have treated my MS condition. Worse yet, I responded with, “Don’t worry, I’m used to it”, without realising how that would sound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 780

You deserved it 130

The Bridges of Madison County 2: Electric Boogaloo

By mistreated mistress - 19/06/2023 10:00

Today, despite the fact that we love each other and are perfect together, my boyfriend still refuses to leave his wife. Apparently it will "mess his kids up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 2 905

Where am I?

By Blinded - 19/06/2023 06:00 - United States

Today, I participated in the "Color Run," an event where you walk across town while people douse you with colored powder. They have yet to implement a rule saying you can't hit people in the face. My ears are pink and blue, my hair's orange, my lips and beard are purple, and I can see better WITHOUT my glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 839

Entitled

By Anonymous - 18/06/2023 15:00

Today, I know my ex has spoiled our daughter. How do I know this? Because I got her a low level job at the same company as me, got her first paycheck and legit asked me, “Is that it? Where’s the rest of my money?” What rest of her money? That’s her wages for a months work. Curse my rich ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 796

You deserved it 227

Fantasy

By Anonymous - 18/06/2023 06:00

Today, I came across an online profile of one girl I had really liked. Since she moved, I've been thinking about her constantly. It seems as if her boyfriend broke up with her and she's moved on from him, so we're both currently single. I still like her and would love to get in touch with her, but have no way to message her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 537

You deserved it 341

The old switcheroo

By Anonymous - 17/06/2023 06:00 - United States - Fairfax

Today, I saw my crush for the first time since she rejected me and said she was a lesbian. The man she was passionately making out with in the dining hall would state quite the opposite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 708

You deserved it 195

Practise makes perfect

By Anonymous - 16/06/2023 16:00

Today, I've practised a particular fast passage at least hundreds of times, it was perfect… then came the competition. I sat down on the chair and played it, but halfway through, my instrument chose to just fall off my hand, not even the bow or something, the entire instrument. It was recorded too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 678

You deserved it 137

Freudian

By Anonymous - 16/06/2023 00:02 - Netherlands - Amsterdam

Today, I was having sex with my FWB buddy. Right when I was about to cum, he stopped, didn’t even pull out, and said, “Wait, I have to text my mom.” The guy is 23 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 936

You deserved it 295

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, it's been almost two months that I've been taking hair, skin and nails vitamins. The only thing growing noticeably longer, faster, stronger, and healthier are my pubes. I've never sheared a sheep before, but I imagine the maintenance I just did was comparable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 787

You deserved it 3 320

Today, my boyfriend started his first day of work. After saying our goodbyes, I went into our bedroom to get changed, picked up one of my blouses and found a camera, still recording. I guess someone has major trust issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 549

You deserved it 4 112

Today, at 19 years-old, I found out that kiwi birds aren’t actually extinct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 1 302

Today, I went into the bathroom only to discover my dad on the pot. “Oh, sorry”, I say and turn to leave. His reply, “Oh I don’t mind. Just having a shit here.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 203

Today, I confronted my husband about yet again going out “with the boys” and not coming home. I told him that as long as he has that ring on his finger, he’s gonna respect me, the kids, and our home. He responded by taking off his wedding band and throwing it to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 060

You deserved it 567

Today, I got the biopsy results from a weird mole I had removed. It's completely harmless, and I have nothing to worry about. My first reaction was disappointment, because I'll have to keep going to work instead of starting cancer treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 290