Relatable

Betrayed

By Whaaaaaaa - 02/03/2023 12:00

Today, my mom had a fit and confessed that my grandfather is also my father. Apparently, I was the product of a rape and she further confessed that she was going to abort me but chose not to, and she regrets her decision. What caused this conversation? Me watching the season 4 of "You" without telling her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 598

You deserved it 179

Double whammy

By Anonymous - 28/02/2023 22:00 - Argentina

Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and walked out. This is two days after she informed me that she is unexpectedly pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 002

You deserved it 98

No thanks

By MrLonelyHertz - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Kingman

Today, I sat down for class. The second I sat down, the guy next to me stood up and moved all the way to the other side of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 190

You deserved it 1 407

Dating apps are hopeless

By Anonymous - 28/02/2023 04:00 - Norway

Today, after seeing that my Tinder profile has been stagnant for a VERY long time, I became desperate enough to purchase a 100x boost. The result? One of the girls unmatched me. Not that it matters. All my matches have yet to answer back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 641

You deserved it 307

Competitive

By Crazy mom - 27/02/2023 22:00 - India - Hyderabad

Today, I've been relentlessly refreshing my email. I'm anxious and expecting the results of a competition. It's my preschooler's playdough competition results. What has my life become? FML

I agree, your life sucks 289

You deserved it 811

Run for the hills

By Stuck - 26/02/2023 04:00 - Canada - Old Perlican

Today, I've been engaged for 2+ years to a man who asks every day who i've spoken to and accuses me of cheating when I talk to people outside of my family. When he's home, I have to watch him talk on the phone to every person who calls. This is considered our time together. Then he wants sex. I know I'm stupid for staying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 1 862

The pits

By speedstick - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I received an anonymous letter telling me that I smell bad, and suggesting that I wear more deodorant. Apparently my BO is so bad that someone feels the need to stalk me to point it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 150

You deserved it 34 929

Goober

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 02:00

Today, at a local mini mart, I tried several times to open a door that clearly said "PUSH" by pulling it, much to the amusement to the customers and staff inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 229

You deserved it 803

Lost in the sauce

By Anonymous - 24/02/2023 22:00 - United States - Spokane

Today, I found out that the mice infestations I've been fighting for the last two weeks was actually a recurring series of tactile/visual/auditory hallucinations, a side effect of a normal, prescribed, dosage of ADHD meds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 131

Been there, done that

By forever alone - 24/02/2023 16:00

Today, I came to the unhappy realization that I’m living such a cliche. I’m completely in love with a totally unavailable man. He’s funny, smart, and drop dead gorgeous. There’s no way I could ever tell him how I truly feel. He’s gay and I’m a woman. We’ll never be more than friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 830

You deserved it 355

Cashed out

By sorkin15 - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I went to Costco and the cashier asked me how I was doing so, to be nice, I asked her back. She said, "I'm fucking horrible, I'm working at Costco," nearly making me spit my drink out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 563

You deserved it 3 149

Healthy lifestyle influencer

By Anonymous - 23/02/2023 22:00 - Canada

Today, I went to the gym and got locked in the locker room. I had to call the gym's phone number to get them to come let me out, after being in there for half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 700

You deserved it 156

Red flag

By wow - 23/02/2023 16:00 - United States

Today, I was called a racist slur because I said I don’t like dogs. Funny how disliking dogs is a “red flag” but racism is OK. Yeah, uh huh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 213

Bad at maths

By Anonymous - 23/02/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I under-read the gas meter in an attempt to get a lower bill. Too bad it was the move-in read, meaning the starting point was way behind, causing a much higher bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 1 562

AAaaaaaah!

By Anonymous - 23/02/2023 04:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I finally got to see my girlfriend's mouth open with pleasure… while she was scratching a bug bite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 752

Don't knock it til you try it

By confusedmofo - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Indonesia

Today, I went out and met somebody. We got talking and we both realized we are each the ideal romantic partner for the other. The only problem is we are both straight men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 338

You deserved it 8 324

Not helping

By Anonymous - 22/02/2023 04:00 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I came home from work early due to a massive headache. A half hour later, the jackhammering started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 747

You deserved it 82

Lovely day

By Anonymous - 21/02/2023 12:00 - Germany - Ebersbach

Today, it’s this year’s first spring-like day, with warm sunshine, birdsong, and the first tiny flowers! So of course I'm taking full advantage of this delightful weather by… being sick and staying indoors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 756

You deserved it 135

Gagging for it

By Anonymous - 20/02/2023 20:00 - United States - Cleveland

Today, my roommate spends so much time in our dorm room that I got a boner when I heard him leaving for class, because it was my first chance in days to jack off in peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 945

You deserved it 275

Acceptance

By tokenTrans - 20/02/2023 17:00 - United States - Thurmont

Today, like many other days, I'm too scared to correct people calling me "ma'am" at work because I live in a small, ignorant town where I've already been harassed and threatened for daring to be trans. I've already had a friend tell me I look nothing like a chick, so what's the deal with customers? FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 793

No introductions needed

By Anonymous - 18/02/2023 10:00 - United Kingdom - Bangor

Today, my younger half-sister discovered my existence. She then went to our grandparents' house, smashed my picture off their wall, and ransacked their house looking for other pictures of me to destroy. She's in her mid-twenties, behaving like a child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 143

You deserved it 108

In New York, concrete jungle wet dream tomato

By Anonymous - 18/02/2023 02:00

Today, my brain seemingly went on vacation and I forgot the lyrics to a song I was performing in front of a live audience, so I ended up ad-libbing a bunch of garbage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 715

You deserved it 305

Mystery

By earth to lissa - 17/02/2023 04:00

Today, I had an endoscopy and nothing wrong was found. So why have I been vomiting up everything, including water, for the past 10 days? FML

I agree, your life sucks 815

You deserved it 82

My feefees

By Anonymous - 17/02/2023 00:00

Today, I beat my boyfriend at chess, whilst also doing my homework and cooking dinner, and he got upset about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 790

You deserved it 137

Oh what a night…

By Charlotte - 16/02/2023 10:00

Today, I went to a Red Hot Chilli Peppers concert with my best friend. We've been looking forward to this for over six months. She spent the entire pre-drinks, pre-party, and concert glued to her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 126

Vicious circle

By Anonymous - 16/02/2023 02:00

Today, after months of therapy, it turns out my erectile dysfunction is basically caused by fear of my wife’s temper. I'm mentally too afraid of my wife to want sex with her, so my penis says “NO”. Also, due to my wife’s temper, I’m too afraid to tell her that I’m too scared to have sex with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 335

You deserved it 316

Fatherhood

By Anonymous - 15/02/2023 18:00

Today, and in the month since our son was born, my husband has lost interest in fatherhood entirely. This morning, our son had naptime in the kitchen, while he was also in the kitchen on a 2-hour work call, and according to him that was father-son bonding time just because they were in the same room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 219

Seek help

By Anonymous - 15/02/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom - Aberystwyth

Today, I’ve been depressed and lonely for almost half my life now, and no longer have any friends or family. I realised I often started hallucinating, most of it making me able to see my childhood and me playing when we were kids. This is getting too painful to bear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 918

You deserved it 151

Need photos please

By Not Jeff Goldblum - 14/02/2023 04:00 - United States

Today, I went out in public for the first time since getting new glasses. I was mistaken for Jeff Goldblum at least a dozen times. The first few times it was amusing, but now I can see why being famous is such a headache sometimes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 150

Genetics

By merr - 13/02/2023 16:00

Today, despite being skinny everywhere else on my body, I have a double chin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 761

You deserved it 152

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of almost 4 months. He was always worried I would cheat on him, so he cheated on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 507

You deserved it 1 074

Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 644

You deserved it 5 857

Today, as a going away present after five years of military service and one combat tour, the hospital scheduled me for a prostate exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 062

You deserved it 4 010

Today, while sitting at my desk at work, a co-worker asked for my help. It was only after I had walked over to his desk, bent over, answered his question, and walked back to my stall, that I felt a breeze. My tube top had slid down across my breasts, revealing my bra to the entire office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 878

You deserved it 43 644

Today, I realized that all my teammates have bigger tits than I do. I'm the only girl on the team. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 593

You deserved it 326

Today, my dog won’t eat the premium $30 per kilo food I buy him, but he will eat other dog’s shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 233