The Top

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Sir, this IS the internet

By greg - 03/04/2024 22:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I’m 24 and apparently going back to school and working a minimum wage job is still considered less than the bare minimum. It sounds like something off the internet. However, people’s actions speak even louder than their words. Sorry I wasn’t given everything or blessed with good looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 155

Face your fears

By Anonymous - 08/10/2025 15:00

Today, I was standing in line at a burger joint, facing my social anxiety and practicing my order in my head so I wouldn’t mess it up. When it was finally my turn, I panicked and said, “One large confidence, please.” The cashier just handed me a straw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 142

School sucks

By I didn't let them down - 04/04/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, my PE teacher was yelling at me because I got exhausted too quickly. As we neared the end of the exercise, he declared, "I will let y'all go early if [my name] doesn't give up halfway through this part." With all of the pressure on me, I forced myself to keep going. Then I promptly collapsed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 143

Are you OK?

By Anonymous - 10/10/2025 22:00

Today, I was leaving a café. I pushed confidently on the glass door… which didn’t move. I pulled. Nothing. I pushed again, harder. Still nothing. A barista finally yelled, “Other side!” as I realized I’d been wrestling with a decorative wall mirror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 358

Brutal

By femmr - 03/09/2021 23:01 - Netherlands - Leusden

Today, I really wanted Anne Hathaway bangs, and let my mom cut my hair. I now look like Patty Farrell from "Diary of a Wimpy Kid". FML

I agree, your life sucks 593

You deserved it 460

Grow up

By Anonymous - 08/04/2024 09:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I cleaned my 21 year-old son's bedroom from top to bottom. When he got home from work all he could do was complain that the clothes that were on his "floordrobe"’ were "only worn once." This was my only day off, so why do I bother? FML

I agree, your life sucks 224

You deserved it 714

Freeloader

By Anonymous - 15/10/2025 12:00

Today, I overheard my coworkers talking about how someone has been stealing lunches from the office fridge. Feeling guilty, I admitted that I took a sandwich yesterday, thinking it was free. Turns out, they were joking to see who’d confess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86

You deserved it 554

Lovely, just lovely

By subhuman inbred - 08/04/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, my mom called me a “subhuman inbred.” All because I was fidgeting during church without realizing I was doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 517

You deserved it 131

One in hole

By Anonymous - 17/10/2025 03:00

Today, I had to sneak a ladder into a cemetery at midnight because my husband got drunk with his buddies, decided to visit his mother's grave, and in the dark he fell into a fresh grave and couldn’t climb out. Not many women can say they’ve seen their husbands climb out of the grave I suppose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 116

By FML - 05/01/2012 15:56 - United States

Today, I received a ticket for not having my headlights on. The cop who pulled me over had a broken headlight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 852

You deserved it 4 968

Family ain't all it's cracked up to be

By Fitz - 09/09/2021 22:59

Today, I finally read an email I'd been avoiding. I thought it would be from my dad whom I haven't spoken to in years, and that he was checking on me during the pandemic. It turned out to be spam. The last contact I had with anyone related to my dad was one of his ex's friends, saying she was in jail and needed help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 841

You deserved it 115

Here you go

By Anonymous - 20/10/2025 15:00

Today, my husband served me divorce papers and an order to grant him temporary custody of our kids. Tomorrow is my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 141

Fingered

By Anonymous - 14/04/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I got questioned by the police. Last night I was at a party when a bully of a kid who happened to be an aspiring MMA coach and local fighter was picking on me, stole my alcohol and threw me out of the party. I heard he got stabbed by someone else he was picking on after I left. The police insist it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 540

You deserved it 117

Why though?

By Anonymous - 23/10/2025 03:00

Today, my best friend of over 16 years is getting married. I was supposed to be her Maid of Honor. Instead I was uninvited a few weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 100

Pissed off

By Anonymous - 16/04/2024 22:00 - France - Laval

Today, I'd thought I was somewhat friends with a girl, the only person I actually talked to outside of school, but after overhearing a discussion I think she may actually have restricted me on Instagram, because I've "always pissed me off anyway." FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 107

Heavy metal

By Anonymous - 25/10/2025 09:00

Today, I was out having a nice dinner to celebrate being hired for a job I was really excited for after two places didn't work out in a year. In the middle of dinner, I got an email from the director informing me that the school has to close due to lead levels in the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 73

Kinda abusive, you know?

By Anonymous - 18/04/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I have spheksophobia, a fear of wasps and hornets. Instead of being supportive, my parents have decided that threatening to beat the dog shit out of me whenever I react to a wasp in the house is the best way to "cure" me. They also won't spray against wasps because dad claims it irritates his allergies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 111

Dazed and confused

By Anonymous - 27/10/2025 03:00

Today, after my workout, I opened my locker to find… nothing. No phone, no keys, no wallet. I panicked and reported it to the front desk. Turns out I’d used locker 37, but my stuff was in 73. The staff found it immediately. I thanked them like they’d saved my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 378

Quack detector

By Anonymous - 06/12/2022 12:00

Today, my sister-in-law told me that I might have to start drinking more herbal teas to calm my mind, but not the antidepressants that the psychiatrist prescribed for my PTSD. I already drink more tea than most people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 719

You deserved it 134

Shit list

By L…… - 20/04/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, after getting ghosted by a company for a job I really wanted, I posted on LinkedIn, venting my frustration with companies not having the decency to send rejection letters. My current boss, who didn't know I was job hunting, saw it, and let me know I'm now on the shit list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 1 042

Overrun

By Anonymous - 30/10/2025 03:00

Today, after I warned my wife that keeping chickens wouldn’t be easy but no, she insisted on having 20 roaming around and at some point a wild cockerel got in, plus she clearly wasn’t finding all the eggs so a bunch of hidden eggs have started hatching. What once was 20 is now 67 and rising. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 104

Assumptions

By Anonymous - 13/06/2020 08:08

Today, a salesman came to the door and I assumed the guy was peddling solar stuff. Before the poor guy had a chance to say anything, I blurted out, "We don't need any, we only spend $80 on electricity in the summer." He pointed to his shirt and replied, "I'm an exterminator." I then tried to awkwardly apologize. FML

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 1 721

Kitchen nightmares

By Anonymous - 18/09/2021 17:00 - Australia - Mypolonga

Today, I dropped my phone in the frying pan whilst cooking my steak. I had to rinse off the oil immediately and clean the phone, then had to eat a cold steak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 296

You deserved it 1 069

Just go for it!

By :( - 31/10/2025 09:00

Today, I've never celebrated Halloween or Christmas because my super-duper religious parents forbade me from doing so. Now I'm an adult and really want to make up for the childhood memories I was brutally robbed of, but I know people will laugh at me and say I'm too old if I try. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 99

Brained

By Qwizzyk - 24/04/2024 16:00 - Russia - Tula

Today, I was riding my scooter at a skate park. I was wearing a helmet, but I got hot, so I took it off. Within the next minute, I fell off my scooter and cut my head open. I had to get four stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94

You deserved it 724

I'm a wreck

By Anonymous - 03/11/2025 22:00

Today, I didn't know how to stop while rollerblading and unfortunately, had an accident that broke my wrist. Then, because I have soft bones, I developed moderate scoliosis. It's been about 10 years of scoliosis. I can no longer rollerblade, downhill ski, cross country ski, or snowboard, even if I wanted to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 333

You deserved it 101

By Princeton - 22/01/2009 20:34 - United States

Today, a girl invited me over to her dorm room at 3 AM. For some reason, I thought it would be a good idea to respond to e-mails just before. She said she was tired and then went to bed. I'm a fucking idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 771

You deserved it 48 009

Friends for life

By Esther - 25/04/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, my best friend’s girlfriend took his phone and blocked me on Facebook, all because I wrote him a heartfelt Happy Birthday message on his wall. I found out because he messaged me from another account explaining what happened. She refuses to understand that we’re strictly platonic friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 552

You deserved it 175

Why not both?

By Christine - 05/11/2025 09:00

Today, my 6 year-old daughter saw me putting on makeup and asked, “Mommy, are you trying to look less tired or more alive?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 121

That's capitalism, baby!

By Anonymous - 13/09/2021 04:59

Today, I went to see three houses to buy. For the past year I've been trying, but investors swoop in and buy the house cash to turn around and rent it. I just want my first actual home for my family, but one of the houses I was going to put an offer on already has a cash offer on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 175

You deserved it 113

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The Top

Today, I was talking to myself in the bathroom to remind myself of what chores I need to do. My husband overheard me and is now convinced that I was on the phone with someone. No amount of proof, logic or reasoning can convince him that I'm not cheating on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 892

You deserved it 2 299

Today, my crazy bitch of a boss fired me for inappropriate conduct. Apparently my "fake Nazi accent" is "offensive to our Jewish coworkers." I'm German. I have no way to change the way I speak, or to pay this month's bills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 104

You deserved it 2 035

Today, after trying to find the perfect picture for the guy I have a huge crush on, I finally found one and sent it to him. His return picture? Himself in a Batman mask and sombrero. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 847

You deserved it 10 906

Today, I had a dream in which I was eating vast quantities of pizza, cookies, and pastries. I became so anxious about all the calories that I woke up. Even in my dreams I'm self conscious about my diet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 557

You deserved it 260

Today, my mother continues to copy everything I do. So far, she's switched to seeing my doctor, my therapist, my hairdresser, and even shopping at my preferred supermarket. I've lived independently for ten years, but I'm starting to fear for my safety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 001

You deserved it 118

Today, I began my first solo holiday at my family's' lakeside cabin. After an hour of tanning in my fave bikini on the lake beach, I saw that I was alone, got brave enough to take a risk, and took off my bikini so my body could get a full tan. Guess when a family from a nearby cabin chose to also come to the lake for fun… FML

I agree, your life sucks 144

You deserved it 456