The Top

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Where are you?

By Anonymous - 14/04/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, it's been three weeks since my parents went on holiday and not only have they not called me, they don’t answer when I call them… until today, when my mom finally called me, whilst I was having sex. She then sent me a text outlining how rude it was I ignored her call and grounded me. I’m 24 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 492

You deserved it 133

Notification sound

By Anonymous - 09/06/2020 02:00

Today, I farted during a Zoom call in front of our client. I thought mic was muted. My Team Lead had lot of things to say to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 166

You deserved it 801

Keeping up

By guy - 18/04/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, lots of guys my age are confident and in the best shape of their life. I've been working out since high-school. However, since I turned 20, my body has become increasingly injury prone on my joints and tendons from wear and tear. I feel like I'm slowly breaking down and I'm only 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 96

Tay-Tay rules

By Not a swiftie - 21/04/2024 06:00 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I realised my girlfriend likes to play Taylor Swift whenever she wants me to leave her alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 174

I'm an empath

By Anonymous - 01/11/2025 03:00

Today, my dad straight up told me I’m not allowed to be depressed because it reflects badly on him as a single parent. This was followed by a threat to confiscate my car keys if I told anyone I’m depressed, even my friends and girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 80

Commitment

By OnTheReceivingEnd - 30/04/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, while feeling really ill, I pumped myself full of caffeine so that I'd be ready to run an online gaming session. I managed to maintain until I realized one of the players hadn't responded for two hours. She went AFK without telling anyone, holding up progress, for the 4th time. I don't know why I bother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 417

Help is needed

By Anonymous - 24/11/2025 03:00

Today, was just another exhausting day in which I cater to the needs of my kids, my cat, and my boss. I work opposite hours from my wife, we barely have energy to catch up and plan chores. I sleep 5 hours a day tops and have to work out daily so my back doesn't hurt. I'm burned out. I don't know what I need but I need it now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 90

Am I being Punk'd?

By Anonymous - 16/05/2024 19:00

Today, my boyfriend and I introduced our parents to each other, and they seemed to have already met somewhere, so I asked them about it. At first they seemed shifty, then guilty, then admitted everything. They’ve actually known each other for decades as part of the same swingers group. FML

I agree, your life sucks 647

You deserved it 154

Seasons gatherings

By What - 29/12/2022 00:00

Today, an old friend of my mom's yelled at me for "ignoring" her. I wasn't responding because she was getting my name wrong, so I assumed she was referring to someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 030

You deserved it 118

LET ME IN

By Zxry123 - 31/12/2022 16:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I work the night shift as a security officer. I packed my uniform and my stuff into one large bag and left for work. When I arrived, I realized that I'd left something important at home, so guess what it was? My security pass and it was almost 5 minutes before my shift started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 714

You deserved it 280

Rollercoaster ride of emotions

By He's ok, nobody died, all is good - 20/05/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I went to my dad's workplace because my sister was there and I wanted to see my newborn niece. I was overjoyed until my dad came up to me. It had apparently been pretty hectic for the past week, because he was on the verge of another stress-induced heart attack. Yes, another. We had to help him outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 88

Keeping up appearances

By JaneSimple - 02/12/2025 22:00

Today, just like every other celebratory day (like my anniversary or birthday) I ordered my own Christmas present. My husband doesn't get it. I tried to explain. He openly admits he has no idea what I like and has no interest in learning, but wants me to have something to open so he won't look bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 116

Fake it til you break it

By Anonymous - 13/01/2023 09:00 - United States

Today, my dad has been faking social anxiety to make me feel like there's something wrong with me. How do I know? Because I actually have social anxiety, and he not only shows no symptoms of it, but he also has a lot of misconceptions about it that he would know are false if he actually did have it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 830

You deserved it 189

Just say no

By Dan - 20/10/2021 02:01 - United States

Today, my boyfriend came out as a polyamorous, and then immediately asked me if he could date another guy I thought was my friend. I’m such a pushover, I said yes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 1 449

Don't harsh our buzz, filthy human

By Ubehage - 06/01/2023 03:00 - Denmark

Today, I bought a huge 1kg bag of catnip and told the delivery driver to just leave the package inside the door. They then left me a soft plastic bag full of catnip. Guess who came home to two stoned cats and a messed up house… FML

I agree, your life sucks 339

You deserved it 1 117

Farrah Faucet

By Anonymous - 24/05/2024 22:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I set about fixing the leaky, loose water tap in my kitchen. After hours of struggling with tools and rubber washers, I'd apparently finally managed to stop the leak. Proud of my handiwork, I turned on the main water to test it. The tap handle shot off, spraying water everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 428

You deserved it 161

The iron is hot

By Anonymous - 22/10/2021 17:00 - United States - West Lafayette

Today, my supposed "best friend" started going out with the girl I'd just split up with, immediately after she said she wanted to see other people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 018

You deserved it 120

Alexa, play "Guess I'm Dumb" by Glen Campbell

By t…… - 23/10/2021 11:00

Today, my coworkers were trying to teach me how to play a card game. There was one rule that I just couldn’t wrap my head around, even with three of my coworkers explaining it in different ways. It just didn’t make any sense whatsoever to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 704

You deserved it 249

Sir, this is a Wendy's

By Anonymous - 11/12/2025 09:00

Today, I've been waiting nearly three days for my Amazon delivery order. I knew that Christmas orders were going to swamp Amazon, so I bought two gift cards and a CD that my mom specifically wanted ahead of time. I purchased them on the 4th to be safe. It's now the 10th, I've been charged, but no sign of my order. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151

You deserved it 243

The Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation Prank

By Anonymous - 12/01/2023 19:00 - United States - Coronado

Today, somebody parked an old truck with "FDIC" stickers on the sides in front of the bank I work at. I've been dealing with panicked customers all day, my manager says that the whole bank is at risk, and we can't find who parked the truck there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 123

On hold no more

By Ghosted - 01/06/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, a guy I was seeing’s father passed away. He’d told me he “needed time to grieve” and he’d reach out when he’s ready to talk again. This was a month ago and haven’t heard from him. I just saw my Instagram feed containing a picture of him and his new girlfriend kissing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 111

Cancel culture strikes again

By Disneydont - 27/10/2021 14:00 - United States - New York

Today, I was supposed to leave for Disney. Our trip was cancelled last year because of the pandemic. This morning, we found out my sister’s boyfriend, who was a last-minute add-on to the trip, has COVID. Cancelled again. Maybe next year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 122

You deserved it 162

That one John Cage track

By dtmm - 22/01/2023 20:00

Today, I was listening to my music on my phone through my Bluetooth wireless headphones. While listening, I turned my music and the power on my headphones off for a bit. I thought I'd lost them when I got home. They were so loosely fit over my ears that I felt like an idiot when I realized they were still on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 225

You deserved it 656

Carry that weight

By Anonymous - 09/11/2021 18:00 - Australia - Moorebank

Today, I was getting up from sitting on the floor. I lent on the coffee table to help support my weight and heard a pop. I'd bruised the tendons in my wrist and now have to wear a wrist guard for 6 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 878

You deserved it 173

What up EWU Crew?

By mario - 30/12/2025 09:00

Today, the cops were called on our apartment because they heard angry yelling and loud screams. I was having a Mario Kart party with some friends over and we got too into the game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 235

You deserved it 178

Animal union

By Anonymous - 01/02/2023 10:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I went to the zoo to see all of my favorite animals. When I got there, I realized they must've all been on strike or something, and refused to come out of their enclosures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 600

You deserved it 288

Wipe out

By Anonymous - 25/11/2021 02:00

Today, I was walking up the stairs with my lunch in hand. I slipped and I dropped my plate, the rice and curry down fell down the stairs, while also spilling the water in my other hand. The wallpaper and carpet stairs are now stained. FML

I agree, your life sucks 823

You deserved it 275

Romcom trope

By Anonymous - 27/06/2024 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, a waiter fucked up by bringing a dessert with engagement ring to our table. My girlfriend started crying and saying, "Yes Yes Yes!" The look on her face when she had to take the ring off and give it back to the other woman… She’s now giving me the silent treatment, even though I did nothing wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 900

You deserved it 114

Gamba streams ruin lives

By Anonymous - 08/02/2023 11:00 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, I found out my mother-in-law sold a precious family heirloom and gambled away the money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 999

You deserved it 109

Pull the wool

By Anonymous - 28/06/2024 23:30 - India - Pune

Today, my girlfriend is fucking somebody else and she thinks I don't know. I'm too afraid to lose her, so I haven't told her that I know. I'm not sure why I'm not ready to let her go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 259

You deserved it 746

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The Top

Today, after weeks of everyone at work avoiding me, I finally asked my coworker what was up. She informed me, “You’re 350lbs and try to dress like an office siren, it’s pathetic to look at.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 480

Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 294

You deserved it 44 141

Today, I was in my bed masturbating when I felt something on my chest. I looked down to see a spider running around. I'm super scared of spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 247

Today, I came home after doing some Black Friday shopping for Christmas presents. I told my husband I got the must-have toy our daughter has been dying for. As soon as I said it, I heard squealing and turned around to see her standing right behind me. There goes the surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 601

You deserved it 13 933

Today, my wife keeps bitching at me that she hasn’t lost any weight on her liquid diet, even though I’ve told her dozens of times that sticking all her normal large portion meals in a blender isn’t exactly a proper liquid diet, it’s just a very unhealthy soup with lumps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 990

You deserved it 112

Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 080

You deserved it 2 822