Today, my boyfriend drove to my house to break up with me. He only did so after I'd vacuumed the whole house to compensate for his cat allergies. I thought he was just coming to dinner. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be a good idea to break up with me in his car. I had to walk home. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I had only been dating him for about a month. Thinking he wouldn't take it very hard, I invited him over so I could tell him in person. Little did I know he was going to start crying on my couch and not leave for 5 hours. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text, right after I finished cleaning his apartment and dropping off a bunch of booze I bought for a big party we were having. It turns out that big party was his "newly single" party. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. As I was leaving his house, I heard him shout, "Hey! Wait! Sweetie, get back here!" He was talking to his cat who'd run out the door behind me. FML
Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house to break up with him. When I got there, I got sent on a scavenger hunt that ended with him proposing to me. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend after concluding we're not compatible at all. He said he knew it all along, but he thought I was "good for all the house stuff." FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to text him when I got home after driving 40 miles in bad weather from his house back to mine. When I did, he broke up with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend called and said he was stopping by to talk. I didn't understand why he would stop by, so I asked if he was going to break up with me, he said no. Half an hour later, he knocked on my door to break up with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend of almost a year and a half broke up with me when he decided he wasn't in love with me anymore. We gave our stuff back, he was joking and happy the whole time until I told him I was taking back my cat. At that point he burst into tears. FML
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Top comments
DrNuggetcase 3
That sucks, but at least your house is clean!
Roevera 14
atleast he didn't just text a break up. but still. shouldn't have made you vacuum..
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Comments (123)
VorpikeII 17
That really sucks. At least you know he won't sneeze snot all over your house.
SuperKnuckels 6
more like atleast he did it in person and not a text or something stupid like that. sryz OP.
VorpikeII 17
Yeah that's very true. One promise I made to myself is to never break up with anyone except in person.
beccaishereyay 11
It's okay it probably wouldn't have worked out in the long run anyway. I could never marry someone allergic to my kitties!
domking1315 20
At least he had the balls to do it to your face. I HATE people who break up over texts
Cad6 24
@OP - Did you tell you're boyfriend that you cleaned your entire house for him? I bet that if you told him that, he would reconsider breaking up with you seeing how much you care for him. However, if you did do that, and he still broke up with you, that asswipe is missing out.
st0815 9
#12: It won't make one bit of difference. She'll still think it's a FML because she shampooed the cat, or her friend had an ingrown toenail and she supported her all day, or whatever else unrelated may have happened. She might even have cleaned the house (which obviously was only necessary because her boyfriend was visiting and has no benefits of it's own).
Annpop 1
He didnt know .. But hes still a dick! Lool
I_heart_sex 1
Which kitty?
DrNuggetcase 3
That sucks, but at least your house is clean!
SkoomaKi 28
That depends who gets the house...
coried91 28
They weren't married and she did state he went to HER house.
The_Hitdude 12
It's not a divorce it's a break up. They're not married. Re-read the FML.
Cad6 24
@ShoomaKi - Your an idiot.
Cad6 24
^You're*...Wow, I just made myself look like an idiot right there. Karma has it out for me.
AwkwardPartyBear 24
I would advise putting a cat in his house while hes out. Bur at least he disnt break up with her through text... I find that a douche movement.
AwkwardPartyBear 24
*didn't
22cute 17
Thats what I'm saying - you got a clean house out of it - that's good luck! The rest? His loss only.
wlddog 14
Who wants to go into a house covered in pet hair anyway. That's probably half the reason he is breaking up. You can always look forward to being the crazy cat lady down the street.
mashfan6507 17
Eh at least you realized it and fixed it. You're smart enough :p
jane_marie 12
Better off without him :)
mwrc8man94 1
How do you know if she's better off without him?
kat2812 1
because he broke up with her, he doesn't want to be with her anymore....who wants to be with someone who doesn't want them back?
nofearjenshere 12
^ me, unfortunately.
mwrc8man94 1
Typical women. Back to the kitchen with yee
Eiregal2 10
Aw babes ( hugs)
Roevera 14
atleast he didn't just text a break up. but still. shouldn't have made you vacuum..
guitarbeast 22
Well how did he know she would vacuum the house? He couldn't just say, oh don't bother cleaning or anything, I'm just coming over to break up with you
donut_gurl 8
you should probably vacuum anyway.
traze 7
Maybe she didn't want to look like a ****.
Drigr 9
At least all you did was cleaned. He could've made you make him a nice dinner, then take you to the bedroom for some sexy time, then end the night with, "Oh by the way, we're done. Thanks for the dinner and sex though!"
Yerg 0
Tru
michelleJ11 25
True*
RuCheezBurger 10
Bring your cat out :D
Redoxx_fml 22
At least she still has her cat
NeDaroft 5
Dinner is served
NeDaroft 5
Dinner is served
NeDaroft 5
sorry duplicate!
sailoroftheseas 7
Carefully place your cat on him while he's not looking
seanc722 2
If he was smart he would have waited until after dinner to break up.
Boss402 0
Shut up you dick
DiscoRanger 0
I actually thought this was hilarious.