Miscellaneous: Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked.... - FML

By yova - 27/03/2016 08:42 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 050

You deserved it 1 872

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Same thing different taste

Judgmental much!?

By Stairway2Heaven - 02/03/2009 21:03 - Canada

Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of nowhere and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says, "I always knew you were a whore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 649

You deserved it 19 443

Mommy dearest

By Ohkourt - 20/04/2020 05:00

Today, I woke up only to find my half-naked drunk mother in my living room, talking in her sleep about how much she hates me. She still doesn't see what's wrong with this picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 652

You deserved it 110

By Thanksmom - 18/03/2016 06:23 - United States - Riverside

Today, my mom yelled at me for going through her closet for some warmer clothes. She had a rant about taking her clothes without her permission, all while wearing a pair of my boots and one of my sweaters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 111

You deserved it 1 462

Let it all dangle

By Anonymous - 08/10/2023 07:30 - United States

Today, my 76 year-old mother-in-law stayed the night at our house. I bumped into her on the way to the bathroom during the night. She discovered I sleep naked. Sadly, I found out that she does, too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 754

Isn't it ironic, don't you think?

By Anonymous - 06/09/2019 20:03

Today, my mom complained that I was being too loud, and she smacked my head really hard. All while screaming at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 491

You deserved it 168

By BeerSlut - 02/09/2015 21:37 - Portugal - Santa Marta De Penagui?o

Today, my mother called me a slut and unladylike because I prefer beer instead of wine. Apparently, beer's only for "unladylike sluts". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 145

You deserved it 2 165

Hypocrite much?

By sonofahypocriticalwhore - 07/12/2012 17:06 - United States

Today, my mom bitched me out and threatened to send me to a Bible camp, after catching me admiring a photo of a bikini model, which is apparently "immoral behavior." This is the same woman who cheated on my dad twice, justifying it by claiming the Devil tempted her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 597

You deserved it 2 293

You OK hon?

By religiunatic - 13/12/2013 17:09 - Canada - Keswick

Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off". She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language". FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 815

You deserved it 3 121

Get back here!

By Anonymous - 12/02/2010 07:51 - Canada

Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 148

You deserved it 2 751

Hank Pecker

By Anonymous - 19/06/2013 15:29 - United States - Richmond

Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 147

You deserved it 3 605

Next

Top comments

syki 22

Sunday 27 March 2016 19:57

I bet you shower nude too, you dirty harlot.

Lilcris11 5

Sunday 27 March 2016 19:59

I bet you were born naked dirty hook

Comments

anonymuse_fml 31

Sunday 27 March 2016 19:56

You keep on using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means...

AndrasteNyx 18

Sunday 27 March 2016 19:59

I do not understand?

tantanpanda 26

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:01

Uh, I think you mean OP's mother.

XandWacky 23

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:08

#10 we know

anonymuse_fml 31

Sunday 27 March 2016 21:04

Princess Bride reference... would be said TO the mother...

ChopSuey444 20

Tuesday 29 March 2016 14:26

It's so sad when you have to come back to explain your own reference.

anonymuse_fml 31

Wednesday 30 March 2016 5:16

#70 - especially such an epic reference. I am now sad because I think it is showing my age... and I am not even that old. lol

Taolan 23

Thursday 31 March 2016 18:14

If it makes you feel worse, I used "Inconceivable!" in a FB group and had multiple people almost instantly respond recognizing the reference. :3

anonymuse_fml 31

Friday 1 April 2016 16:03

Apparently FML is the wrong forum for TPB references :(

syki 22

Sunday 27 March 2016 19:57

I bet you shower nude too, you dirty harlot.

ea247 20

Sunday 27 March 2016 19:58

I bet she's naked under those clothes, that ****!

h00tzForOsi 20

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:16

Op's mom showers naked too! That hypocritical ****!

refticon 31

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:42

Bravo #2 well commented ^^

youdontsay123456 21

Sunday 27 March 2016 21:43

You mean, *gasp* you don't shower with clothing on?

interesting33 36

Tuesday 29 March 2016 16:02

You mean you take your underwear off to pee - you don't just let it filter through the clothing?!!! What a disgrace!

brenton490 19

Sunday 27 March 2016 19:57

Did you tell her" Mom I'm not a **** I'm just a commando!".

Lilcris11 5

Sunday 27 March 2016 19:59

I bet you were born naked dirty hook

thestoryofacaleb 14

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:24

Hook.

O_B_A_M_A 15

Monday 28 March 2016 0:30

What a ****

Dawnoftime 12

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:00

A parents pursuit to reform their child's actions only ends at the grave.

HarmoniousMe 11

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:25

everything in our lives ends in the grave.

Aerobic_Exorcism 13

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:29

Debt doesn't.

Dale_shackleford 13

Sunday 27 March 2016 21:05

It does in America

never_three 21

Sunday 27 March 2016 22:06

#34, nah it just gets transferred to the next of kin. Your family gets your debt, my nana is still paying off all my papas credit card debt.

anonymuse_fml 31

Monday 28 March 2016 7:06

#43 I pay insurance on my student debt so if I die, the debt is cleared.

R2Y2 22

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:00

Your mom sounds like a bitch.

Tripartita 44

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:01

I tend to agree with her, OP. I don't believe in sleeping naked before you've married your bed. Are you at least engaged?

HarmoniousMe 11

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:26

or at least in a seriously committed relationship? maybe a domestic partnership?

UserError94 18

Sunday 27 March 2016 21:19

We can only hope she used sheets for protection

Billie-Jo 9

Friday 16 April 2021 5:39

😂

drchinky888 9

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:03

Leave her and run away. I don't think she values you. Just kidding, she would be overprotective for you.

hipposteve 21

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:07

Your mom is hating :P give her a snickers

cole66 14

Sunday 27 March 2016 20:07

hey, she is the one who got in bed with a man.

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I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 78

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I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 76

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I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 663

Today, I found out my son has a new hobby after seeing a picture on the internet: putting realistic-looking stickers of spiders at the bottom of my coffee mugs. My wife was scared half to death this morning after downing a cup of coffee and then glancing the cup's bottom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 359

You deserved it 4 813

Today, while pumping gas, I stopped to think about what a failure my life is, and how badly I've treated people in my past. While deep in thought, I accidentally pulled the gas pump out too far and covered myself with gasoline. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 541

You deserved it 25 427

Today, I learned that my boyfriend has narcolepsy when we were having sex and he passed out on top of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 586

You deserved it 4 085

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 155

You deserved it 7 740

Today, at a family reunion, we all squeezed in for a picture. I set the self-timer and ran to get in it. 2 seconds before the picture went off, some guy came up, stole the camera, and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 411

You deserved it 2 512