Intimacy: Wrong sort of poking

Wrong sort of poking

By Anonymous - 22/09/2013 05:40 - United States - Brandon

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

agreeclassic 54 220

vote type 1 9 747

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Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML

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By LaLa - 20/09/2019 22:00

Today, I was fooling around with my partner after his shower. He moved my hands up to push me against the wall. Instead of hitting the wall, my hands hit the shower rod. It fell on my face and I got a bloody nose. FML

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Today, I thought it would be sexy to surprise my boyfriend by hiding in the closet naked and pouncing on him as he came to get his pants. I never got to the pouncing. Apparently my boyfriend has heightened reflexes so instead I got slapped hard across the face. My ear is still ringing. FML

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By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 20:23 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

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jaysvn 2

Sunday 22 September 2013 13:18

that's a dick move.

naxeeb 33

Sunday 22 September 2013 13:16

Maybe his one-eyed-snake was trying to find a partner? :P In any case, you should put ice on that OP!

Comments

NewGrl 4

Wednesday 25 September 2013 4:58

One thing I don't understand. Why was he trying to hit your forehead with his dick...

silvanawernli 5

Wednesday 25 September 2013 5:33

first of all, why would he even try to hit his girlfriend's forehead with his penis?

justinguy 4

Sunday 29 September 2013 23:20

pink eye ?

kitkat47 3

Thursday 19 December 2013 23:19

This isn't a regular thing is it?

kkroberts072592 7

Friday 5 September 2014 15:15

Ummm how tall are you lmfao

msdtreadwell 15

Monday 22 December 2014 21:03

The old 'I slipped' story huh

cronagorgon 11

Tuesday 16 June 2015 17:37

OPEN WIDE ;-;

FweakofCydonia 40

Thursday 3 March 2016 19:50

*Mortal Kombat music* FATALITY!

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