Kids: Who? What?

Who? What?

By Female - 22/01/2013 23:16 - Australia - Elsternwick

Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum." I'm only 26 years-old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 866

You deserved it 2 815

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/10/2014 01:33 - Australia - Liverpool

Today, early in the morning, I got a knock on the door from the police. It seems my son and his friend had been caught throwing toilet paper at a neighbour's house. He's 23. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 982

You deserved it 4 135

By Anon - 23/06/2014 23:13 - United States - Denton

Today, after nearly a year of being stalked, harassed and even terrorized, the police finally found out who my stalker was. It was my 19-year-old son, who thought it would be a fun prank to pull. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 936

You deserved it 5 964

By ihateteenagers - 30/12/2010 02:12 - United States

Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 566

You deserved it 10 070

By duckthehack - 28/01/2011 14:25 - Poland

Today, my 14 year old son got suspended and I had to pay for the damage after he sprayed "FUCK THE POLICE" on the back wall of his school. I'm a policeman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 970

You deserved it 8 894

By bitch i'm a gerontophile - 29/11/2012 18:08 - Taiwan

Today, while working at my local supermarket, I found a boy lost and wandering about, so I took him to the front desk. My reward from his mother was a slap around the face and harsh words for supposedly having kidnapped him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 146

You deserved it 1 863

By Anonymous - 23/12/2012 15:02 - Australia

Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 603

You deserved it 51 506

By notyouagain - 03/10/2010 07:40 - Australia

Today, I went over to my friend's house. Her 5 year old son answered the door and when he saw me said, 'oh great, it's YOU' and slammed the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 578

You deserved it 4 947

By Anonymous - 30/10/2010 23:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked outside to find someone had egged my house and smashed a pumpkin onto my car. I later discovered that the perpetrator was my own 8 year old son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 005

You deserved it 5 513

By Anonymous - 04/09/2009 23:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking home from work going over a railway-bridge, when a 12 year old boy standing at the bottom asks if I could help him carry his bike up, as he couldn't lift it. I did it for him, and was greeted on the other side by his father - who thought I was stealing it and hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 230

You deserved it 2 471

You people are twisted!

By pledonasm - 15/03/2015 16:11 - India - Thane

Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 077

You deserved it 2 269

Palirose 22

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:04

Tell the police that, so that they can take him to his real home and family.

tacojauns 45

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:10

Congratulations on your new son!

Comments

Palirose 22

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:04

Tell the police that, so that they can take him to his real home and family.

Nukes4You 8

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:06

Psssht. Nah, leave them to figure it out.

FastidiousPear 6

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:17

Yeah, go along with it. Be like, "Ricky, you scamp. Get in here." Then when the cops leave tell him you'll turn him in of he doesn't pay you every week.

Harpy20 24

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:20

Sounds like a smart kid.

Cashtangoteam 10

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:39

Well you should ground his ass, that'll teach him to not show up at your doorstep.

oj101 33

Wednesday 23 January 2013 12:32

Victoria, Australia? Was the 15 year old guy one of the Janoskians? They do stuff like that - being public nuisances.

madreedy 7

Wednesday 23 January 2013 12:43

Reminded me of Angelina Jolie's movie "Changeling"

xXLadyWhiskeyXx 13

Wednesday 23 January 2013 15:23

GAH! I was going to suggest that!

AFCA020 4

Thursday 24 January 2013 22:33

My guess is that the real fml is not this 15 yr old kid saying he's her son, but the cops believing the kid while op is 26... therefore the cops must think she looks a little over 26

RayearthNinja 10

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:05

This sounds like the first episode of Once Upon a Time...

Enslaved 36

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:05

Did you play along or send him to the fryer where he deserves to be?

strawberrywine22 30

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:29

But where's the fun in that? Much better to cover for the kid, gain his trust, obtain actual address, and blackmail him!

zebraumicornz 6

Wednesday 23 January 2013 12:29

24-Yep it's so much more fun to go to jail for black mailing children. *clap clap clap*

samasara 20

Wednesday 23 January 2013 13:04

47. #24 was obviously being sarcastic...

Googolman 29

Friday 25 January 2013 6:02

OP: I will show you some ID that I am only 26! Cop: Gasp! You naughty girl, having sex at 11 years. We're taking you to the slammer!

cosicosei 22

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:06

bahaha faking addresses. I bet he faked his name too, who wants to get caught, he was probably really scared.

strawberrywine22 30

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:21

I hope if he faked his name he at least came up with something good. My kid brother got caught selling cigarettes to middle schoolers and his fake name ended up being Hancock Rugby, a combination of the poster in the store window next to him and the street sign.

Zomg_Okay 26

Wednesday 23 January 2013 15:29

21 - There are more dangers than just your name sounding silly. There's a chance of faking your name via your surroundings going horribly horribly wrong, as a certain Pea-Tear Griffin can attest to.

little_sailor 8

Thursday 24 January 2013 4:34

I'm naming my child Hancock Rugby.

EnigmaThe321 12

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:06

Well, the stork was just a tad bit late. Surprise!

GhostDuck 30

Wednesday 23 January 2013 22:01

More like early, OP's only 26. Clever boy, faking addresses. Did you play along OP?

pjordanw 9

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:07

You should have played along with it. Would make for a good story. Lol

tacojauns 45

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:10

Congratulations on your new son!

TrueTriage 16

Wednesday 23 January 2013 10:56

Good thing this kid has his head straight half the parenting is done for you!

nigsuzzi 3

Thursday 24 January 2013 11:00

Jokes on u guys. OP is blind. : P

irishpassion16 6

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:11

I hate it when FML's leave you wondering what happened next! This is one of those FML's.

strawberrywine22 30

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:14

That's why I love it when the authors give feedback! Hopefully she does, this has got humorous potential!

banana527 12

Thursday 24 January 2013 22:14

Me too! I rlyy want to no what happened

strawberrywine22 30

Wednesday 23 January 2013 9:13

The doting auntie in me would have played along to keep him out of trouble, but the soon-to-be mama in me would have played along and beat his ass for the vandalism and the lying! Okay, perhaps that's a bit harsh. Probably just have a few choice words for him while turning him over to his real parents.