Intimacy: Twisted

Twisted

By sleepwalker - 22/11/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, I woke up in my roommate's bed. Apparently, the previous night I sleep-walked into her room, layed on her bed, and fell asleep. In the middle of her and her boyfriend having sex. He's now going around saying he slept with both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 769

You deserved it 4 724

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Same thing different taste

By Arizonagirl - 06/11/2016 07:31 - United States

Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 308

You deserved it 840

By Sleep Walking - 23/01/2009 18:51 - United States

Today, I found out that after drunkenly falling asleep at a guy's house, I not only slept-walked in his house, but I went upstairs into his parents room. And used their bathroom. I don't remember any of this, but his mom does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 892

You deserved it 9 224

By chacha - 28/11/2009 18:11 - United States

Today, I realized that I'm a sleepwalker and for the past week, that dream where I was giving my roommate a blowjob was real. He just pretended it never happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 549

You deserved it 5 531

FML: Uncensored

By Anonymous - 15/01/2012 02:00 - United States

Today, while spending the night at a friend's house, I was woken up by someone kicking me. I figured she was having a nightmare, and since we were sharing a bed, I reached over to wake her up. Turns out it was her boyfriend trying to push me off the bed because they were having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 717

You deserved it 4 422

By Anonymous - 18/10/2009 11:15 - United States

Today, after sleeping with a guy I met at a party, I woke up to find him peeing in the corner of my room on my roommate's carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 580

You deserved it 24 328

Cheeky

By woopdeedo_1 - 07/03/2010 19:56 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to a party and crashed on the bedroom floor. I woke up to sex noises coming from the bed. I pretended to still be asleep. I sent a text to my boyfriend to tell him about it. I heard his phone beep from over in the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 229

You deserved it 3 609

By itsemilyc - 02/02/2015 19:34 - United States - Byron Center

Today, my boyfriend "accidentally" had sex with my roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 859

You deserved it 4 308

By Anonymous - 22/01/2014 00:55 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I learned that my girlfriend can sleepwalk. She got up, came into the living room where I was laying back against the sofa playing video games. I wasn't really paying much attention, until she stepped on my crotch, after which she left. She doesn't remember a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 370

You deserved it 6 204

By anonymous - 08/01/2015 19:10 - United States - Noblesville

Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 122

You deserved it 3 367

By Anonymous - 26/08/2009 05:12 - Canada

Today, my roommate brought a guy home at 3:30am. Not having a condom, she ran into my room to borrow one of mine. She was overzealous, jumped onto my bed, and cracked two of my ribs. She then took the condom, left me lying paralyzed with pain, and then had very loud sex, which I heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 235

You deserved it 4 108

Shoemaster 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 9:41

well you did sleep with him ;)

v1kt4r 13

Sunday 22 November 2009 9:28

wow, i heard sleepwalking is usually with subconscious intent, OP y do u subconsciously want to sleep in your house-mates bed

Comments

jjcooper 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 15:44

how is that an FML?

sexybitch92 0

Wednesday 5 May 2010 11:08

threesomeeee.!!! haha

ladiesman14 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 16:12

duh he did sleep with both of you. at least hes not a lair saying he f'd both of you. FBY. you probably wanted to f hom anyways.

wellthatsucks 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 17:45

1. Learn to use proper grammar. 2. He's not lying, he technically slept with you, but it is kind of immature. 3. How did your roommate end up letting you sleep in her bed while she was having sex??? Not while, but why did she let you sleep there?

DameGreyWulf 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 20:42

I'm sure your room mate appreciates everyone thinking she'll threesome with other chicks or that he's a sneaky player cheating on her. Unless she does for the former, then I guess it's not so bad for her.

Pointy130 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 20:52

Am I the only one that noticed: OP sleep-walked in and fell asleep?

CableX17 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 1:07

Lol!!!!! Totally didn't catch that, nice

u_less 1

Monday 23 November 2009 0:58

This is halarious!

Ninjaface 0

Monday 23 November 2009 8:24

Obviously the boyfriend screwed you in your sleep. Your roommate just left that out of her story because you were better in bed asleep than she was awake. Tell the boyfriend that you picked up some sleeping pills and want to know if he's up for another round.