Today, I got into a major fight with my parents over my younger brother stealing from me. Their response was to get angry at me for my "tone" with them. My brother is 18 with an obvious drug problem, but my tone is the problem. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, my mom yelled at me for fighting with my younger brother. Not because she wanted us to stop, but because my brother couldn't find a good comeback to my argument. FML
Today, my younger brother and I got into a fight over who the favorite child is. My mom overheard, came in the living room and said, "It's your little brother, now shut up." She was serious. FML
Today, I found out my junkie brother broke into my home, and stole mine AND my children's belongings whilst we were on holiday. I rang my mother to vent, only for her to blatantly defend him and insist I got it wrong. We caught him on camera, and now I'm being scolded for even thinking he would do such a thing. FML
Today, I got into a huge fight with a girl at school. My mom and dad decided to punish me by letting my three older brothers pick out my wardrobe for the next week. FML
Today, my mom and siblings got into a fight. Being generally quiet and non-confrontational, I stayed out of it. Shortly thereafter, I was yelled at by my mother for being "ungrateful" and "disrespectful." I still don't know what I did wrong. FML
Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML
Today, my 19-year-old brother broke into my dorm and robbed me. When I tried to file a report, my brother went to my parents and told them that he took it because I owed him money on a bet. Guess who lost $92.50. FML
Today, I yelled at my oldest son for picking his little brother up by the throat. Only to then be yelled at my my mother-in-law for hurting his feelings. FML
Today, my brother yelled at me, calling me a "no-good fucking whore", because I couldn't fix his laptop. The same laptop he threw on the floor after screaming "FUCKING HEAL MEEE!" at his game. As ever, my parents took his side, refusing to believe that I can't fix a cracked monitor. FML
Today, my older brother offered me a cigarette. I took it and barely took a drag before he socked me in the arm and lectured me for taking the offer. He's an alcoholic, and smokes daily. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
vicewinner 5
Maybe they try to protect themselves from the real problem. It is easier to be mad at you than to acknowledge something that might shatter their world.
gary8082 14
Classic enablers.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (29)
vicewinner 5
Maybe they try to protect themselves from the real problem. It is easier to be mad at you than to acknowledge something that might shatter their world.
besani 4
I agree
Jennifer Hardy 11
tell them
Rachel Todd 9
I can say Hi, and every one is "what's with the attitude?? " I'm sorry, but there's no winning.
RichardPencil 30
Maybe you ought to steal some of your brother's drugs, and then you can relax and gain a better "tone."
gary8082 14
Classic enablers.
lukcy_basartd 11
Lock your room. Save. Move out. Win for yourself, not them.
Kiticakes 4
They're gonna end up with him worse off or dead if they keep that up.
GhostFox 33
A lot of parents that have children with addictions or risk taking behavior become overly strict towards the other child(even) in the house in an unhealthy attempt to feel like they have control. It's "safer" to yell at a largely rule-abiding child than once that displays erratic behavior and has no morals, ethics, or respect for their parents. Unfortunately, chances are that they will never outgrow their selective punishing and that you will be better off saving up to move out. If you can a bank account or lockbox to put your money in, in order to keep your brother out of it, do that. Ask if there's a way to prevent your parents from accessing it, and if there is, do that too.
thebundu 4
I am sorry to burst your bubble, but while the stealing is a major problem for sure, the tone is also a problem, and it is not serving your purposes. The tone changes the message. We humans only rely on the actual dictionary meaning of words for only 7% of the message; the rest is the tone and body language. A poor tone can change your message from, for example, "I have this problem of having my money stolen and would like your help and collaboration because it does not work for me; it makes me very upset" to a judgmental one, of, for example "I think you are incompetent and are irresponsible, and are bad at your skills of parenting, and I look down on you". The former can hopefully elicit a collaborative finding of a solution, and the latter can make the listeners feel threatened, defensive, and uncooperative. This sample difference in the message received can often be about HOW one speaks as opposed to WHAT one says/is trying to say. Try talking to them calmly, when you are calm. And express what you are feeling in kinder words, and get them to see your issue.
Winchesterbride 9
that's not how it goes though. the parents of OP seem ignorant and that's why toning down won't help.
Danne696 14
I mean, if you want to be particular about it then just mentioning tone, body language and the actual meaning of the words aren't the only things that matter. For example, the parents frame of reference to the words spoken changes the meaning for them individually and their mood when confronted matters as well. The problem with applying psychology to individuals is that there are so many factors that are impossible to know that you're never going to be certain of how a person is going to react. If OP spoke calmly and reasonably stated what she meant to her parents they might as well feel that she was patronizing them like they didn't even understand what the problem was which would also lead to a fight.
CrazyTrainWreck 19
Seems to be a common thing with us firstborn's. My youngest sister is 21 still lives with our parents. When I turned 18 I had to move out ASAP. I am the only one of their kids married and with a successful career yet I'm treated as a failure.
TaoShaman 24
Marriage is a sign of success now? Someone sounds arrogant and judgemental.
CrazyTrainWreck 19
Read your own post carefully, you are the one being judgemental and arrogant. Let me phrase this in a way even you can understand: A happy Marriage and a successful career generally means you are doing well and don't need to mooch off others in your family all the time. I'm sorry if your life sucks so much you have to take it out on some random person on the internet.
onceuponatime456 16
There is nothing in his post saying that marriage is a sign of success. Perhaps you should learn to read BEFORE you post a snarky reply!? From his message "I am the only one of their kids married and with a successful career yet I'm treated as a failure. "
readingrachel 9
They probably know and are really upset by his drug problem but at the same time they might think that you're the child who's good so you deserve all of their attention and "lessons" since you are the most reasonable.