By skidmark - 08/12/2011 14:48 - United States

Today, while standing completely still at Walmart, I was hit by a drunk man on a Jazzy Scooter. He laughed, said it was an accident, gunned the scooter and took out two more people. FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 424
You deserved it 2 670
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Top comments

Heeeerroin 5

Honestly thought it said Jizzy...

127 8
smdthinks 0

I'd expect nothing less from walmart shoppers.

121 3

Comments

Heeeerroin 5

Honestly thought it said Jizzy...

127 8
i_amthe_walrus 0

What a peculiar old man. I want to be just like him when I grow old.

8 20
Lanceeden 12

I used to be a happy walmart shopper. And then I took a scooter in the knee.

59 5
reaganomics 6

If he was holding a bagged 40oz it would complete my mental picture

13 0
Damn_Hippster 11

Why didn't you get out of the way? How hard is it to hear a scooter approaching you?

7 9
SpruceDread4578 13

79- -_____- really?!

7 12
docscientist 9

Cause, baby, it just got back from the jaazz club.

10 5
mrmystery96 0

The old man must read questionable content.

1 0
smdthinks 0

I'd expect nothing less from walmart shoppers.

121 3
bballsoccerrocks 7

He must be a bad driver

1 5
xxGheTToGumbYxx 16

Or he wasn't using his hands to drive because he was busy doing jazz hands on his jazzy scooter! Haha.... -_-

15 1
yumlicious 4

I've never been in a Walmart. Always hear funny/horror stories from Walmart shoppers. Maybe I should venture in there sometime.

7 0
jwade11 12

I would of probably got pissed at first but then after watching him run over other people I'd probably laugh. Once I realized it wasn't just me and he was just running over everyone it would make it funny..

7 1
THE_A_TEEN 27

Obnoxious MW3 (possibly bf3 fanboy) basher strikes again. -From your local BF3 player.

10 5
urdirtyolduncle 15

Damn you BF3 fanboys and you're improving games with better graphics!!!

4 9
GrahamAker 3

I just wanted to make someone laugh I dent know you get hated on for nothing. :(

11 5
Torva_fml 16

56- it's not funny if it's overused, and half the people don't care.

2 0
The_Troller 14

**** BF3 and all of it's fancy graphics and dedicated servers and cool guns. I've got pokemon!

23 0
honne_tatemae 9

Oh yeah? Well I've got snake on my Nokia 32 10!

1 0
rexgar2000 10

yeah lets sue and old man that is trying to have fun before his last days. heartless much?

29 3
MikeDa1Da 14

6- you're probably one of the stupid bitches that sues for "mental anguish" after a car accident or some other minor accident.

21 2
lemonhead12004 2

Yeah suing someone is always the way to go. You better hope not if you want to be a dentist. Those medical malpractice suits add up quick.

0 0
cduran2011 6

Old people on scooters can get away with anything. I saw one at Target grab a girl's butt and say that he "was reaching for an item" in the middle of the aisle. I guess there has to be an advantage of being old.

36 0
geon_olam 17

he was reaching for an item just not the kind thats for sale at least not in target

18 0
cduran2011 6

Have you been to the outside of Target in NYC? EVERYTHING'S for sale there. haha. Maybe he thought he was in NYC.

9 0
noodlepoodle96 0

He's having fun in his little scooter of doom ;D

13 2
geon_olam 17

"gunned the scooter" did he modify the engine on that thing or something? cuz those things go like 4 mph

50 1
DFlit1 0

He could have reached in the little opening near the motor and held the governor off so it would go like 10mph lol

21 2
braceletsandhell 7

I would have gotten on a scooter and chased after him (:

20 4
cduran2011 6

Reminds me of the Psych episode where Gus is complaining about the possibility of being run over by the Haunted House car ride that goes 5 mph. =P

6 11