Health: Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my...

By therundown - 20/07/2011 13:38 - United States

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 605

You deserved it 3 978

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Same thing different taste

By 918boyz - 04/02/2009 22:23 - United States

Today, I got in line at the grocery store. The woman in front of me looked right at me, turned to her friend, and said "That reminds me, I forgot to get acne cream." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 828

You deserved it 2 620

By alex - 14/03/2011 14:44 - United States

Today, my girlfriend asked me to hold her purse while shopping. All of a sudden, a robber punched me in the face and took her purse. She started crying about her purse and told me to get off the ground because I was embarrassing her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 788

You deserved it 10 065

By Username - 08/07/2011 20:02 - United States

Today, I noticed a woman struggling to work a parking meter, so I went over to help. She took one look at me before screaming, hitting me in the face, and running back to her car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 193

You deserved it 3 610

By dmvsucks - 13/09/2010 15:14 - United States

Today, I was at the DMV getting temporary tags for my new car. While waiting in line, a huge fat lady behind me felt the need to run her finger down the scar on the back of my neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 622

You deserved it 3 089

By Marc - 06/02/2012 21:43 - United States

Today, while I was standing in line at the store, some guy insulted the girl in front of me as he walked past. She turned around and socked me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 927

You deserved it 2 189

Opportunist

By Tmo - 12/08/2023 08:00

Today, I saw a toddler bolt in a parking lot. Since he was running towards the road behind me, I scooped him up to hand off to his mother. She shrieked, snatched him from my hands, and sprayed me with mace. While I was writhing in pain, some punk kid lifted my wallet and phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 221

You deserved it 114

By keep_your_eyes_on_the_sidewalk - 25/06/2018 15:00

Today, a girl with her eyes glued to her phone bumped my arm going in the opposite direction on the sidewalk. She dropped her phone, chased me to the bus stop, and told everyone that I broke it. She threatened to call the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 156

You deserved it 218

Pranks for all ages

By atleastshelldiefirst - 13/10/2012 00:18 - United States

Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 978

You deserved it 1 800

By whaaaaat111 - 09/03/2013 12:04 - United States - Vienna

Today, while at the mall, a lady dropped her credit card while in line to buy something. I came over, picked it up and gave it to her just for her to shove it in my hand and scream, "She's stealing my wallet! My wallet!" The police came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 698

You deserved it 2 758

Don't bother

By NoticeTheLackOfNumbers - 12/08/2009 22:43 - United States

Today, I was at the store when I saw that a cart in the checkout line next to me was starting to roll away and the owner hadn't noticed. I tried to help by reaching out to stop the cart from moving, but when the owner saw me with the cart, she began to hit me for trying to steal her purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 747

You deserved it 3 250

RetardedChipmunk 7

Wednesday 20 July 2011 18:53

That's a weird fetish...

hellokat1 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 18:54

Did she eat it afterwards?

Comments

Squit_fml 16

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:03

Now THAT is a little bit of an awkward situation there.

ABbaby 10

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:03

She was grooming you like monkeys in the wild

coldasfire 23

Friday 22 May 2015 6:29

ew lol

Dj4406 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:04

wtf!!!! o_O

Calyx_fml 21

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:04

YDI for being selfish. Next time share your skin flakes with others.

kaoriblossom 8

Wednesday 20 July 2011 22:32

Skin Flakes are the knew Corn Flakes :)

PopRocks14 0

Thursday 21 July 2011 8:06

THEY'REEE GREATT!

tylerrice 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:06

psycho bitch

Madelinexo 6

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:06

hello, sunscreen!

FarSide 22

Thursday 21 July 2011 5:49

Exactly. OP did it for playing tourist, and skipping the UV protection. Probably doesn't use contraceptives either.

musicfreak9821 6

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:07

That is just nasty! why don't you take her purse and smack her upside her head!

JTthePurpleNinja 5

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:09

yeah, that's not strange o_O

sexckendra 0

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:10

that's really gross and creepy....

hottiewitdamesse 8

Wednesday 20 July 2011 19:12

okay.... um that's nasty....

Keywords

Relatable Students Work Mental health Kids Parenting Love Embarrassing Awkward Family Wanker Intimacy AITA First Dates Singing Cats Animals Weddings Public freakouts Bodyshaming Cars Cops Transportation Sex Sexism Growing old Health Periods Job interview Education

The Top

Today, I learned that my husband “accidentally” let the dog out and allowed her to be eaten by an alligator because I got a male coworker, who is also a good friend of mine, a birthday present. We had an argument about our friendship, which apparently bothers him. I’d had that dog since I was a junior in high school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 101

Today, I had sex with someone new for the first time after my 10 year relationship ended. The person was a friend who had been making serious sexual references toward me on and off over the year I've known him. I don't know if I'm more embarrassed that he couldn't keep it up, or that I came from anticipation anyways. FML

I agree, your life sucks 956

You deserved it 282

The Top

Today, I had a surprise test for Economics. While taking the test, I put my head down so I could think. A while later, I awoke to the whole class turning in their test. I had to turn in my test incomplete. No questions answered, just my name, the date, and a pool of drool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 835

You deserved it 41 951

Today, a man with a clipboard came up to me in the street to ask me if I was happy with my life insurance. I couldn't bring myself to admit to him that I'm so clueless about my own life that I wasn't sure I was even happy with the Twix I was eating at the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 679

You deserved it 3 737

Today, I got back to work. Last week, my divorce was finalized and my last name is, once again, my maiden name. Since I'm a teacher, all my students will remember me by my ex-husband's last name. I get to be reminded every day that my marriage failed until everyone memorizes my maiden name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 095

You deserved it 4 080

Today, my boss gave me an "All you need to know about grammar" book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 217

You deserved it 32 998

Today, I discovered that the guy I've been seeing is a firm supporter of the Westboro Baptist Church. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 364

You deserved it 7 525

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 774

You deserved it 280

Same thing different taste

Opportunist

Pranks for all ages

Don't bother

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