Today, my wife went into the bathroom at Walmart. Being almost sure there was no one else in there, I stood around the corner to scare her. As the door opened, I jumped around the corner and scared an innocent woman to so badly she peed herself. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I shat myself in the middle of Walmart. It dripped out the bottom of my pants till i made it to the restroom, which was on the other side of the store. FML
Today, I managed to scare my wife by walking round the corner on my way to the bathroom. Somehow this scared her so bad, she decided she’s done with my shit and wants a divorce. I just needed to pee. I never play pranks on her, so how can she tired of pranks. What did I do wrong? FML
Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML
Today, at nine months pregnant, I stopped at a truck stop to use the restroom. I opened an unlocked stall door and stood face to face with a woman bent over wiping. She let out a scream so blood-curdlingly loud that I wet myself. FML
Today, I was at the store with my wife. As we were walking out, I helped an elderly woman get through the door. As I was opening the door, my foot got stuck on the door and my face was catapulted into the woman's breasts. It wasn't until we got into the car that my wife burst into hysterics. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML
Today, at work, I wanted to scare my best friend, who is also my coworker. Thinking that he was cleaning the women's bathroom, I snuck in and right when I was about to scare him, my store director came out of the stall. FML
Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML
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Top comments
wellthatsunfortunate 10
That is a f... her life, not yours. You said it yourself: you were ALMOST sure. Simply don't do things like that.
BurnInDemonFire 39
"This week on 'Weird Things in Walmart', Stan frightens an innocent woman so badly she pees herself, a man who self-identifies as a tree stands tall in the parking lot, and local misfit Rebecca the Redneck flashes the staff hoping for a discount on budget booze. Tune in tonight at 9/8c."
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Comments (25)
Chazzster 32
I guess that shows that in OP’s state you can get married at the age of 16?
Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15
must hurt to be that stupid
Emma Marshall 19
Didn't she just go to the bathroom though? How'd she pee again 🤔
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Wait, if she just came out of the bathroom, why did she pee herself? And also, Walmarts are usually packed, so their bathrooms rarely have less than two or three people. Plus, how old are you? Twelve? Grow up.
1ninjanina 7
Why are so many people upset he was fooling around? Can’t people have fun? If he was right, and she was the person coming around the corner, it might have been hilarious.
Sinshine 28
"Being almost sure" aka "Being not sure"
WHSKitty4ever 23
Who does things like this? How old are you, 2?
srtrpk 6
Someone with a sense of humor 👌🏼
donthatemebut 14
She was leaving the bathroom. How did she pee herself?
raven_of_azarath 35
You know it was a good scare if she peed again after just going to the bathroom.