Today, my wife didn't say a word to me because her horoscope told her not to. FML
Add a comment - Reply to : #
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Create my account
Sign in
Top comments
By
bthomas0319
| 2
Make a fake horoscope and make it say that you have to be your husband's slave and do whatever he says
By
kaylynheartsyou
| 10
Then dont talk to her for one day.
COMMENTS
By
kaylynheartsyou
| 10
Then dont talk to her for one day.
Reply
daysgoby902
| 6
that's legit
Reply
tybtab
| 5
then when she asks why say your penis told you to
Reply
YourEvilHero
| 12
you married a winner!
Reply
NuckinFutz
| 4
#1-that's retarded. I hate when people copy someone that pissed them off. They will just think u r a dumbass and it won't piss them off at all
Reply
FMLuvLife
| 3
if you're both Pices tell her you two don't belong together, and when she asks why say your horoscope says so.
Reply
idancewithrev
| 0
she will listen to a horoscope but not u...there is a problem in this relationship.
Reply
Pixxio_O
| 11
Sell all her shoes and with the money buy a years supply of tomatoes and tell her your horoscope told you to
Reply
urdirtyolduncle
| 15
Shows how stupid people are who follow horoscopes.
Reply
Epic_Phale615
| 0
I like 16's idea...
Reply
333TheSemichrist
| 0
...and why is this an FML?
Reply
idancewithrev
| 0
56- that's harsh...I mean taking a girls shoes...not a good idea
Reply
Pixxio_O
| 11
Your right 57 :O that is pretty harsh... Sell all her toilet paper?
Reply
portcaveman
| 5
I agree with 1. its not that hard to not talk to someone for one day.
Reply
Iamnotmyself
| 17
I swear we as a species are getting fucked over by stupid myths and scams. Well, tell your wife that she is being completely stupid and show her studies to prove to her they're not real. Also get me popcorn as her moronic arguments will be hilarious!
Reply
idancewithrev
| 0
I make a living off scams...
Reply
newnew8
| 0
haaa bitch.
Reply
ktateprado
| 0
47- I hate people that say stuff is retarded. So STFU.
Reply
Pixxio_O
| 11
109- tomatoes are retarded
Reply
ktateprado
| 0
114- I thought we were friends.
Reply
Pixxio_O
| 11
109- we are :o I was joking :P
Reply
Think of it as a vacation!!!!
Reply
enonymous
| 8
There's a lot of other wives that need to read that horoscope.
Reply
juicedboi
| 7
The FML here is that the horoscope won't be the same tomorrow right? It's ok I understand your pain my friend. Gifts like this only come around once in a lifetime.
Reply
commietaco
| 0
they can still have sex, right?
Reply
zendaddy0
| 0
No way 1 that would make him an asshole since it's a guy doing it
Reply
Damn_Hippster
| 11
I see no problem here
Reply
schmock_fml
| 0
how'd she tell u y she's not talking to ya?
Reply
gogreen8856
| 0
that's stupid
Reply
ADTRarmyFTW
| 4
tell her that yours wanted you to hire a prostitute. ;) bet shell talk then
Reply
balljoints
| 8
LOL
By
bthomas0319
| 2
Make a fake horoscope and make it say that you have to be your husband's slave and do whatever he says
Reply
Hahaha. haha. ha. ha. uhh... excuses for humor...
Reply
bananaburger
| 0
Oooo lala
Reply
halleyroosan
| 8
Was this supposed to be funny?
Reply
slitherbomb
| 0
Or you can just beat her. Violence is always the answer.
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
35- It was supposed to be, but it wasn't funny at all
36- Your a dumbass, beating your wife isn't cool
36- Your a dumbass, beating your wife isn't cool
Reply
Simpson143
| 2
36 - Violence is never the answer! "Violence?" is the question, and the answer is yes.
Reply
A7X_LoVeee
| 10
49 I think you mean sex.
Reply
FMLuvLife
| 3
#49 only when you're dealing with Justin Bieber. :)
Reply
slitherbomb
| 0
43- I really hate it when I'm referred to as a dumbass by someone who doesn't know the difference between your and you're.
Reply
A7X_LoVeee
| 10
Yo. That kid has 11 million some followers on twitter. Those beliebers get rather vicious when you insult Jbiebs...or so I hear..
Reply
maz255
| 10
op: hehehe bondage sex here i cum..
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
59- Yes I screwed up one word, I admit it. You have still managed to ignore the rest of my comment though.
BTW Thumbing up your own comments right after you post them makes you look a bit desperate for thumbs up
BTW Thumbing up your own comments right after you post them makes you look a bit desperate for thumbs up
Reply
A7X_LoVeee
| 10
LOLLL. I was actually the first one to thumb his comment up.
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
No, it appeared with one up, the I thumbed it down, then you thumbed it up
Reply
6sick6
| 4
I'm pretty sure 36 was joking. I laughed :/
Reply
Stonedmanalex
| 0
now we know what #70 does
Reply
slitherbomb
| 0
70- it's a joke. I didn't actually want the guy to beat his wife. Are you autistic? I don't think you can sense sarcasm. Oh and btw, I love thumbing up my own comments. Makes me feel good about myself. Thanks.
Reply
6sick6
| 4
GO 88! :D
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
I just love thumbing my own comments up after I post them, it makes me feel so good about my life :)
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
Why don't we thumb up our comments together!
Reply
sparklecherry
| 4
Lol!!
Reply
Simpson143
| 2
58 - Touché. He's the exception. :)
Reply
ktateprado
| 0
Instead of beating her, give her hugs and kisses, tell her you love her, then tell her to make you a sandwich.
Reply
Weetart
| 8
Yes, that may work. But I feel that this was God's way of telling Op to divorce her ass. That will get to the root of all evil. Horoscopes, you must be crazy to actually depend your life on it.
Reply
daysgoby902
| 6
why would that make her crazy. she probably just didnt want to talk to her husband that day.
Reply
aFatFuck
| 0
Horoscope says: SAMMICH TIME, EVERY TIME. AWWWWWWW YEEEAAAAAAA
Reply
mynameis1339
| 0
I thought of bad stuff. Damn. I'm not okay.
Reply
hmac1717
| 0
Wtf
By
Thisismypchere
| 8
That's really stupid. I bet, no I don't know...
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
Thanks for wasting my time with that pointless comment. That was ten seconds of my life wasted reading this pointless drivel.
Reply
KiddNYC1O
| 20
Both of you, thanks so much. Those comments wasted much of my valuable time and effort. Life has now changed for me forever.
/sarcasm
/sarcasm
Reply
6sick6
| 4
46, is something stuck up your ass?
Let people comment!
Let people comment!
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
Did you read that comment and think "wow, that was such an intelligent and meaningful comment, that has added alot of my FML experience, thank you for your intelligence and insight."
Reply
BADDiam
| 4
Lola
Reply
ktateprado
| 0
97- if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all mother*****er.
Reply
gchartier90
| 0
46, it took you ten seconds to read that haha sad
Reply
teenager34
| 0
46- that took u ten seconds ?
Reply
_Oblivion_
| 12
115 If you're gunna curse at someone grow some balls and dont * it out.
Reply
duckie227
| 22
am I the only one who agreed with 46? that comment was pointless and made no sense. someone needs to learn some grammar
Reply
PutItIn
| 8
46 So u waste Another 30 seconds of your life to write a comment
??
??
Reply
raphanne_fml
| 33
Agreed with #46 too! And #115, we could also apply your logic to #3's comment: "if you have nothing interesting to say, say nothing at all blank blank".
And it probably took #46 10 seconds to read the comment because he had to remove all the maple syrup off his forehead after facepalming mid-sentence to the stupidity of #3's comment, while enjoying a great maple syrup toast!
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to French cancan myself to my kitchen to make me a French toast!
#46, any maple syrup left?
And it probably took #46 10 seconds to read the comment because he had to remove all the maple syrup off his forehead after facepalming mid-sentence to the stupidity of #3's comment, while enjoying a great maple syrup toast!
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to French cancan myself to my kitchen to make me a French toast!
#46, any maple syrup left?
Reply
gchartier90
| 0
maple syrup jokes , classic and very original
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
Oh my god, all of you, except for 144 and 161, are you defending #3s comment, that was one of the stupidest comments that I have ever read
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
It took me 10 seconds because I:
Read it once
Thought WTF
Read it again
Thought to myself what a fucking pointless comment
Read it once
Thought WTF
Read it again
Thought to myself what a fucking pointless comment
Reply
derekwb
| 0
It took u 10 seconds to read that? Damn
Reply
gchartier90
| 0
well now that you say you read it more then once. the comment is stupid
Reply
duckie227
| 22
yeah that's right. give me the thumbs down because you know I'm right and you are ashamed you didn't think to
say it first
say it first
Reply
NikkaIraKate
| 1
I agree with 46
Reply
NikkaIraKate
| 1
Its actually pretty stupid and thanks for wasting 12 seconds of my life dick
By
Tesaatje
| 12
That's a little bit crazy?
Reply
Frijolero_92
| 1
Does she freak when she spills salt :D
Reply
annasworld
| 3
wow this fml sounds like something my mom would do
By
ATLBOI770
| 0
den stop actn like a b n dnt talk to her
Reply
KiddNYC1O
| 20
I see you have qwerty problems.
Reply
cowsgomooatyou
| 8
Dat is so tru man safe blud from da hood.
Reply
YourEvilHero
| 12
dude you sound so gangsta and cool when you say that!!! I'm totally jealous, like can I have your autograph?
Reply
YourEvilHero
| 12
i guess theres nothing wrong with that if you're 12 or a 23 yr old Justin bieber fan
Reply
LolMoqz
| 10
lolwut
Reply
Brool_Story_Co
| 17
Oh my god, are you fucking kidding me. Can you please learn to type like you have a brain instead of typing like a retarded dumbass.
Reply
A7X_LoVeee
| 10
How is this kid a Justin Beiber fan? Sounds straight from the hood so I think you must mean Lil Wayne.
Reply
JenDanielle917
| 13
Learn to spell please, no one can comprehend what your trying to say.
Reply
Justforlolz
| 14
...lolwut?
Reply
RebekahBrooke
| 9
if you do not know words, then please don't try to type them.
Reply
Weetart
| 8
#99, if you are trying to get your point across, especially when it comes to correct English and spelling; then make sure every word of your sentence is correct. It's you're not "your."
Reply
killianisboss
| 0
*you're
Reply
Schiffy
| 18
145 - Sakura's face in your avatar + comment = perfectly lulzworthy.
Reply
incrapper
| 7
none of you guys know his life what if he couldn't finish high school. I grew up in a bad neighborhood and if you don't want to be picked on you had to fit in and also the way people talk will stick to you. like if your from
England you will have that type of accent. don't judge before you know. what he meant to say is... Refrain yourself from portraying female characteristics and avoid her
England you will have that type of accent. don't judge before you know. what he meant to say is... Refrain yourself from portraying female characteristics and avoid her
Reply
9gag4life
| 1
I think it's actually easier to type like a normal person rather than that nonesense
By
KiddNYC1O
| 20
Does she also make a wish at 11:11?
Reply
americanhoney4
| 6
hey!! there's nothing wrong with making wishes at 11:11!!!
Reply
12em12
| 1
I do.
Reply
KiddNYC1O
| 20
I think for someone who's acknowledged as "wife", most likely over 21, you don't want to practice superficial stuff from High School.
Reply
alyssa0
| 4
Hey, I make wishes at 11:11! :P
Reply
RacerX1695
| 1
I can't wait for November 11, 2011, at 11:11 because it will be the ultimate wish moment. And it will be very sad also…
Reply
Taurusbaybe
| 8
...I do :(
Reply
JokerJohn7
| 0
Lol. Do your wishes come true? Didn't think so.
Reply
nerdgastic
| 4
umm why would it be sad? I mean Skyrim is coming out that day! :D
Reply
nerdgastic
| 4
my other comment was directed at 176
Reply
MarkFeehily
| 0
Me too :)
Reply
kevsnev
| 7
Lol. You even got 11 thumbs up xD
Reply
FiestaInMyPants
| 8
I feel excluded since I've always wished at 12:34..
Reply
Hockeyboy4280
| 18
You have 11 thumbs up... wow.
I make a wish, hahaha
I make a wish, hahaha
Reply
KYCats95
| 5
I once made a wish at 11:11. I wished it would be 11:11. The clock immediately changed to 11:12.
Reply
Mipz
| 2
Now there are ten thumbs up. :p
Reply
incrapper
| 7
179- I bet your a Taurus :)
By
anakaren_831
| 1
superstitious much?
By
ant1078
| 7
annoy the fk outta her until she cracks ?
Reply
MurphyS94
| 4
Umm or just enjoy the silence?
By
PopRocks14
| 0
Annnnnnnnd thats why I don't read horoscopes
By
xXxXxMasonxXxXx
| 7
Umm wow
Reply
izzabella43
| 0
Omg ur pic! I went to that tim burton exhibit too! :O
High fives! :D
High fives! :D