Today, my teacher turned around from the blackboard and screamed, "Stop chewing your gum like a cow!" That wasn't so bad. The bad part was when she realized it was me, she apologized saying, "I'm sorry. You're not really a cow. I don't want to traumatize you; you're just overweight." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Please, apologize
Today, my teacher yelled at me for using my phone in class. I apologized out loud, knowing that it would help me get off easier. She was yelling at somebody else. FML
Today, in an effort to avoid my school's strict no-gum policy as my teacher made a b-line to me, I swallowed it. By the time the teacher reached me, the gum was on my desk, as well as my breakfast, thanks to my overactive gag reflex. FML
Today, I was in a good mood for once, but my professor looked at me and said, "I don't know what you ate for breakfast but you're really annoying today." FML
Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML
Assumptions
Today, I was teaching when I saw a student leave her chair and brazenly head for the door. I clapped her on the shoulder and said, "Going somewhere, miss?" She vomited all over my pants. FML
Today, my math teacher raged at a student for eating an apple in class. As he yelled at the student, he slapped the apple out of his hand and right into my face. Everyone laughed, including the teacher. FML
Today, during my friend's group's science project presentation, the teacher yelled at me, "Stop making stupid faces at the presenters!" I was smiling. FML
Today, in class I was teaching 6 year olds about the difference between short and tall, and I asked them how they could see that I was shorter than the other teacher. One of them raised their hand and said it was because I'm fatter. FML
Today, I gave a presentation in class. I felt pretty good about it, until afterwards when I was told I lost points for communication because I'd been chewing gum. I wasn't, I just have a speech impediment. FML
Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML
Top comments
0opsie 6
YDI for chewing your gum like a cow. That's really annoying to everyone else who's too polite to say anything.
Mesocoollike 8
It's horrible, but really funny...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (121)
AAShah 0
LMFAO! I literally burst out laughing!
adorkable_spazz 0
Wow...your teacher is mean...
mintcar 10
Haha, when I chew gum I irritate those around me by making that galling pop sound. Anyways OP, I can understand how hurt you are by this. Overweight or not, she probably shouldn't have lashed out like that.
jessecax 0
get in the kitchen and make me a few hundred sammiches. that'll help ya lose some weight.
ArianS2 0
I'm sorry, as a female you don't have the rights to say that.
jessecax 0
and why is that?
ArianS2 0
It's just the rules god made. Simple as that. Until the day female don't get ****** behind they deserve no respect.
thorfinntheassri 0
Ha ha.... C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER
MissErikaHart 0
N-N-N-No
Just_Do_it_fml 0
great j0b! :)
thorfinntheassri 0
Ha ha.... C-C-C-COMBO BREAKERRRR
ImaginaryFoe 1
A rare double fail. Nice.
JanisEvans 10
YDI for chewing your gum in whatever annoying way. Who chews gum in class anyways? Show some respect. If not for your teacher, then at least for the education you're provided with.
Lisa89 3
Agree. the sound of chewing gum is so annoying.. especially in a friggin class room!
mouxouxou 11
23-You are an ass by mistake just to get attention or are u born this way?Stop being misogynist and try to say something FOR ONCE that won't actually decrease your ''masculinity''.You are practically a (wo)man who doesn't earn respect IN ANY way BY HIS OWN words.
Syrael 0
why so serious? ^^
mouxouxou 11
I couldn't help myself.Some words are just so mean.And even for this example with the ''teacher'' because sure it is wrong to chew a gum during class,and the teacher has the right to ''punish'' the student but not insult her.The teacher is supposed to be the educator.He/She is supposed to show the best possible example.
ejoyy 0
ahaaa FYL for beaing fat maybe you can think bout chewin that gum like a cow while running on the tredmil maybe then you wont get compared to a fat cow ! haha