Today, my step mom and her kids moved in. This is my first night sharing a room with her daughter. She snores, sleep talks, and sleep scratches the side of the bed creating a sound like nails on a chalkboard. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I'm spending the night at my family’s house. I have to share a room with my two kids and their mother. The three of them snore like warthogs in a zoo. Desperate for sleep, I went to go sleep on the couch. The dog sleeping on the rug snores like an old truck. I’m never going to get any sleep. FML
Today, I'm stuck with sleeping in the same room as my mother. The problem? Her snores are extremely loud and a full minute long. I'm not kidding, I timed it. FML
Today, my dad and I had to move in with my mom. There's only two tiny rooms, and my aunt lives there along with her dogs and my cat. The dogs have tried to kill my cat, I have to share the bed with my mom, who snores BAD, and I haven't slept in two days. I work early all week. FML
Today, after months of living with my roommate's horrific snoring, I looked over to see her sleeping quietly. Elated that I might actually get a full night of rest for once, I went to bed. Just as my eyelids began to droop, she started making vile hissing sounds. Yes, hissing. FML
Today, my step-mom tried to ground me. I met her just yesterday, when she moved in. FML
Today, my mother is snoring so loud that I can still hear her with the door shut and with earplugs in. So much for sleep. FML
Today, after 3 days of interrupted sleep, I confronted my new neighbor about the noise his wife keeps making during their "private time". He then let me know the noise is actually from his daughter, who's mentally disabled and isn't taking the move well. FML
Today, my flatmate moved in with me. Unfortunately, unbeknownst to me, so did her mother. FML
Today, after months of peace and quiet since January, a new family moved into the apartment below me ten minutes before I was about to go to sleep. They've been here for 30 minutes and already they're stomping and banging doors all over the place. FML
Today, despite asking her to stop countless times, my stepmom still barges into my room explosively and without warning. I faint when startled. FML
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Top comments
demonmonkey 13
Sleep scratching? That's a new one...
BjgUsername 12
Maybe she's angry that her mother married your father and stayed awake just to screw with you in an attempt to make everyones lives harder? I only suggest this because I've never heard of sleep scratching and you'd think the sound of nails on a chalk board would wake any one up.
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Comments (73)
MKProcks 13
Looks like you are going to have a very good life with your new family. But Sorry for that.
perdix 31
Just put her hand in a bucket of warm water. That'll stop the scratching noise for sure. :D
Druu 53
I was JUST going to suggest this. But then OP would have to share a room with a bed wetter!
perdix 31
#32, no, she wouldn't. Usually, they make bedwetters sleep in the garage. That's the deranged genius of the plan!
mcrepas 19
Mittens! For the scratching. Sleep scratching, strange.
bobslawnservice 16
A lot of that sounds like it could be stress induced. I'm sure that as she strats feeling more secure in her own home her sleep habits will improve.
Aero220 16
Tell her to sleep on the floor which would cause an argument large enough to make your parents separate the two of you. Then you can share your bed with someone less annoying... like a bed wetter.
AshleyScruggs 14
OP said they were sharing a room, not a bed.
lopsop 12
I wonder if she puts pillows in the oven
RedPillSucks 33
Hopefully her sleep talking isn't "kill them, kill them all"
Druu 53
REDRUM REDRUM!
Modulation 4
Punch her.
shibeep 12
Better than my cousin who sleep pisses... Perfect aim, too bad it was my dresser
Jlow17 4
Op are you a guy by chance you could have some fun with this ;)