Today, my school is having a mandatory class on etiquette. We've just now progressed onto forks after a long, tedious discussion on spoons. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was eager to learn how to use chopsticks, as I was in a nice Chinese restaurant and had ordered noodles. As I was visibly struggling to eat, the server brought me a fork. When I reached for it, I flicked a noodle into a lady's soup at the next table. FML
Today, I was so bored that I spent two hours researching the history of spoons. FML
Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML
Today, a white guy tried to teach me to use chopsticks properly. I'm Chinese and have been using them since I could eat. FML
Today, during my second day on the job, I ate pasta with a pen in the backroom. My old job provided plasticware, and it never occurred to me to pack a fork. FML
Today, I was doing my homework on the computer when my dad walked by with a plate of food, threw his fork at me, and said "POSTURE!" FML
Today, my mom insisted on making my lunch. She didn't know that knives are banned at my high school, and packed me a steak knife for cream cheese. I'm now suspended for 7 days, and she refuses to say that she did anything wrong. FML
Today, my freshman students got in a fist fight over a chair. FML
Today, in the class I'm teaching, I assigned my students an essay to complete for homework. One student asked me if I was deducting points for bad spelling. I teach English. FML
Today, I learned that my aunt, who lives with us, is using our chopsticks in her hair and putting them back in the utensil drawer without washing them. I'm the one that uses chopsticks the most. FML
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Top comments
Olovio 5
Bet you can't wait for sporks!
W0 0
Fork your life!!
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Comments (197)
grdianknight 0
good, nothing wrong with having some table manners. too bad parents aren't teaching this anymore (in general)
Nitial 6
maybe he didn't see OP's name. I don't really look up at the name. Just a thought.
instnt1nfction 17
I bet, your even more lame
Zombieslayer1 0
Just wait till they start telling about different plates and bowls, you could spend the rest of your life on this subject.
instnt1nfction 17
sporkity spork spork
ironchick 0
aww OP it's ok :) At least you didn't actually have to learn... or did you :P
Mazi09 0
who knows that might come in handy someday... not that I would remember anything from that class.
vbmg152 19
A little etiquette never killed anyone!
kGoatly 0
Etiquette....psh. School system needs to focus on more important things..
rockyraccoon28 8
holy crap, where in the world did you find a chocolate moose?!