By akasha - 06/04/2012 06:15 - Canada - Hamilton

Today, my patient had her call bell on. When I went to see what she needed, she replied that she was very itchy and could not reach to scratch the itch. I basically got called in to scratch my patient's crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 916
You deserved it 2 596

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So you're upset that some poor woman was so uncomfortable that she had to swallow her pride and press a button to get someone else to scratch a private area? Perhaps patient care is not the right field for you. F HER life, and grow up OP

What you need is a "buttscratcher!"

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Careful next thing she will be asking for is to use your tongue.

Back scratchers OP. They reach more places than just your back! Also, your patient wasn't Cee Lo Green by chance? Prime of example of a cross between a T Rex and man...

Boner! Nah jk. But I'm pretty sure we're all horny teenagers

Sounds like a low quality porno to me.

Turn that scratching into DJ diddles...she might even start to like it

Thats a little weird and creepy

Especially, since OP is a girl and her patient was referred to as 'her.' I sense there's much more to this story . . .

I can't tell you how many patients have asked me to scratch their crotch. Apparently, the adult diapers (or briefs) cause some fierce itching.

Being a nurses aide I understand. And hey when you're 90 years old, shit and piss yourself, and can't scratch anything you'll be asking for someone to scratch your crotch too. Guy or girl doesn't matter. We have the hardest yet most caring and compassionate jobs out there. And I say GO YOU OP! For being that caring and compassionate to scratch an old ladies crotch :)

What you need is a "buttscratcher!"

Yeah, and we also need an option to post a YouTube video just in case some people don't get the buttscratcher joke..

40- if they don't google it they don't deserve to know it

Kole - Yes, that's exactly what Fmylife.com needs, the ability for trolls to spam the comment section with irrelevant Youtube videos. Excellent idea.

Buttscratcher.. :( (You guys ruined it)

I wouldn't mind if she was hot.

Because hot chicks are allowed to have crotch rot?

I imagine the patient to be a really old lady. Still wouldn't mind?

Either way, it was a girl scratching another girl.

6 - I'm sure she was hot, As in hostpitals usually don't have air conditioners...

CROTCHSCRATCHER GET YOUR CROTCHSCRATCHER HERE!!!

CROTCH SCRATCHER??

am I just stupid or did it take everyone else a while to be able to say "crotchscratcher" without messing up? lol.

That's gotta be awkss

Why the FUCK do people say 'awks'?! It's so annoying. -_-

People like you are ruining this generation with your asinine abbreviations. Use actual words please.

I think the worse one I've heard is "Awko Taco."

If i had some sexy nurse i'd pull off some bullshit like that to have her fondle my balls a little

And in an exciting twist, you find out that the "sexy nurse" is actually a pre-op tranny! Aww yeah, son. Wait, no? Did that not...that doesn't do it for you? OK, welp, bring on the thumbs down.

You'd be surprised how many able bodied men ask for help in the shower at a hospital. It's not something you can say no to either.. Oh the things I've seen O_O

I once had a 30-something year old man ask me to hold his penis while he peed into the urinal. I thought he was joking so I chuckled. Well, turns out he wasn't...

Well after a surgery, it's hard to shower, because you are so sore, I've been there, done that lol

18 - As a novice nurse, I couldn't say no and was too naive to realize the difference, but as I learned the tricks of the trade, I found ways that many able-bodied men found it extremely hard to resist not calling me again (i.e. ice cold bed baths/showers, rough handling) *In a sweet innocent Betty Boop voice* "Oops, I am so sorry, sir, was that too cold for you? Let me scrub away all that nasty dirt and get you all good and clean." *Scrubbing vigorously making him as pink as a newborn baby while batting eyelashes and talking sweetly*

ah little over there.. yes.. yes... ohhh.. ahh.. now down..lower... lower... yeah that's it... mmm... yes..

stevenJB 25

Lower...ahh..lower...lower...TOO LOW!...lower... :)

10 your profile pic matches perfectly

peter should invent on selling backscratcher at different places now.