Although it's a really crappy situation, I'm sure he'll still appreciate your present, and maybe you'll be able to spend more one-on-one time while visiting him in Florida!

look on the bright side now you have a new crossbow

Maybe he can have an “accident” with the crossbow and avoid alimony.

Return it and get Dad a card. You are going to need the money more than Dad needs a crossbow. Or keep it for yourself....

Now shoot him in the leg so he wouldn't move out of your place.

I'm kinda curious what age you are. However, if he's willing to ditch you and move to another state at the drop of a hat, I don't think any amount of crossbows will buy his affection. It sounds like he's just not that involved of a father.

looks like he already got himself a birthday gift

So you have to hunt retirees instead of tourists. I'm sure you can manage.

At least you have a new use for that crossbow.

He can't live for Florida if he's been shot with a crossbow.