Love: Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep....

By quietsleeper - 13/10/2009 11:07 - United States

Today, my new girlfriend told me I don't snore when I sleep. Which is funny, since during the last year of my marriage, my ex-wife would make me sleep on the couch because my loud snoring kept her up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 501

You deserved it 2 962

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Same thing different taste

Chainsaw massacre

By sleepless in sleeplessness - 18/06/2021 11:01 - United States

Today, my girlfriend snores like a lumberjack. Even when I leave to sleep on the couch, I can still hear her through the door. She won’t go to the doctor because, "snoring runs in her family and they’re all just fine." Yeah, uh huh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 924

You deserved it 136

Booming

By Whats a Snorlack - 10/04/2023 03:00

Today, my new (and possibly ex) husband told me he is reconsidering staying married to me. He thinks my snoring is “so unlady like” and he can’t live the rest of his life sleeping with a “fucking Snorlax.” I’ve had sleep apnea since my mid 20s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 025

You deserved it 180

By Sleep Deprived - 25/12/2011 05:27 - United States

Today, I was awoken by my wife, once again. It seems that whenever I stop snoring, she thinks I died so she has to wake me to make sure I'm still living. She does this almost every night, every hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 188

You deserved it 3 802

Earthquake

By Bolin - 17/05/2021 08:08

Today, I have to sleep in another room, with the door closed, because if I don't, my girlfriend's snoring will keep me awake. I was diagnosed with chronic insomnia because of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 916

You deserved it 118

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 104

You deserved it 41 479

Zzzzzzzz

By turnedintoinsomniac - 21/01/2011 19:46 - United States

Today, after months of living with my roommate's horrific snoring, I looked over to see her sleeping quietly. Elated that I might actually get a full night of rest for once, I went to bed. Just as my eyelids began to droop, she started making vile hissing sounds. Yes, hissing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 497

You deserved it 2 857

By kingkobrastrikes - 21/01/2015 01:56 - United States

Today, I was asleep and snored so loud that I woke myself up. I was at work and I am now the laughing stock of the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 516

You deserved it 20 530

When you're in a dream…

By Anonymous - 12/01/2010 01:40 - United States

Today, I woke up at 3 a.m. because my wife was snoring loudly enough to wake me up. I went off to the guest room to try to get back to sleep. Eventually I fell back asleep. Then I had a dream that my wife was snoring loudly enough to wake me up. It woke me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 012

You deserved it 3 091

No Ragrets

By Rodolfo_el - 17/04/2021 10:59

Today, my wife made me sleep on the couch because I ate the last Magnum Ice Cream bar. Last week, she bitched me out for singing too loud in the shower. I strongly regret leaving my ex-girlfriend of 5 years for this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 1 862

Zzzzzzz

By Alyssa - 21/09/2016 07:17 - United States - Spring Park

Today, my fiancé, my two-year-old, and my dog are all sleeping peacefully next to me in our new king-sized memory foam bed. It's 2:15 in the morning. Why am I not sleeping? Because they all snore, one right after the other. It's like an endless song of snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 304

You deserved it 1 221

jmcow 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 16:17

Sucks man. fyl. You're ex-wife wanted the whole bed to herself. But at least you have a girlfriend now.

allmightyspiff 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 16:12

Actually snoring can be caused by stress, so maybe thats the problem? http://www.etipsguide.com/snoring-and-stress.html

Comments

Troll_patrol 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 17:58

She made you get on the couch so we wouldn't be disturbed by your fat ass while we were *******.

mikew85 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 18:10

this is a stupid fml. you're complaining because you don't snore, you have a new gf, and your bitch of an ex is gone? **** you for complaining!!

idontgiveone 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 18:11

this is stupid xD and so you believed your new GIRLFRIEND rather than your ex WIFE? god you type of people makes marriage means so useless. STFU

Hellsno 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 18:55

How is this a FML??? Maybe you used to snore and now you don't! Whats the big deal???

catatonicsleep 17

Tuesday 13 October 2009 19:03

Some people are lighter sleepers than others, maybe your girlfriend is a deeper sleeper than your ex wife.

plutosaplanet 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 19:55

i think you missed the EX part dumbass....in fact i think you missed the whole point of the FML stupid fml this was supposed to be a reply to someone else.