Today, my mom smoked pot in my sister's bedroom while I was at school. When I noticed the stench, she blamed the cat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML
Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML
Today, my mom accused me of smoking weed. Truth is, I'd just ripped the quietest and weirdest smelling fart of my life. She wouldn't believe me, accused me of making stupid excuses up, and grounded me. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house when I got a call from my parents. They told me to come home immediately. Panicking, I rushed home. My dad pulled out a clear tube filled with dried leaves. They accused me of having marijuana. It was catnip for my kitten. FML
Today, my mom told me she was getting tired of the smell of marijuana in the house. So I confessed and told her I'll never bring it home again. She was talking about my neighbors. FML
Today, my mom found a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. She hates smoking, so she tore every single cigarette to pieces, then emptied a bag of kitty litter on them. On my bed. FML
Today, my mom came home drunk and yelled at me for 20 minutes for not feeding the cat. We don't have a cat. FML
Today, I used an air freshener in my room to make it smell good. At first, the smell was pretty pleasant. However, by the time it'd "soaked in" it smelled just like weed. My whole room stinks of it, and now my mum is convinced I've been smoking pot in my room. FML
Today, when I was at my girlfriend's house, I farted and blamed it on the cat. I forgot the cat died 2 weeks ago. FML
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Top comments
freya1998 23
Soft kitty, high kitty Little ball of fur Happy kitty, hazy kitty Purr, purr, purr
TheNewGuy03 29
Now I'm thinking of a kitty that's absolutely blazed out of its mind.
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Comments (65)
briahw 10
Yay! I got the 10,000 FYL!
Zebediabolical 45
I've smoked pot that left a smell that was pretty much identical to cat poop.
Zebediabolical 45
I meant cat-pee, not poop. My bad.
Oyas12 14
She must've taken an american airlines first class seat cuz she is high as shit
xMaeLA 24
Your mom is a boss. xD
carriegirl098 16
She must be pretty ******* high to think the cat was smoking with her
Mr_anonymous21 3
how is this an fml moment, apparently you just have an awesome mom lol.
FKLinguista 9
If you're tired of it, wait until she's high as a kite and play police siren sounds on some speakers. She'll flip out and probably never smoke pot in the house again.
tomahawkk2468 8
How do you know what weed smells like...?
eighthling 10
I'm guessing she was stoned when she blamed the cat.
DaRito 25
So what? Weed doesn't smell bad and it's her choice to smoke.