Miscellaneous: Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort...

By idontevencareanymore - 23/05/2014 21:25 - United States - Jarrell

Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 183

You deserved it 4 681

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Same thing different taste

By nick - 06/03/2011 01:42 - United States

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 433

You deserved it 3 813

By speed-dialing dr kevorkian - 27/02/2016 07:25 - United States - Two Rivers

Today, my mom came home heavily drunk. As I was taking care of her, she told me all about how I was a mistake. That didn't hurt nearly as much as when she told me she wishes I'd died during her pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 141

You deserved it 1 316

By roselysunset - 29/07/2015 17:07 - United States - Cypress

Today, I came home to find my mom drunk. She asked me for a hug and then started crying, "Where's my daughter?" I'm her daughter. And her only child, as far as I know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 752

You deserved it 1 621

By wtf mom - 31/05/2013 04:20 - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 742

You deserved it 3 532

By Anonymous - 24/12/2018 12:00

Today, my Mom found out that I've been intimate with one of my best friends in the past. We used protection, it never went anywhere, and we ended it amicably, but she still gave me a huge lecture. Later, she high-fived and congratulated him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 688

You deserved it 492

By anonymous - 19/08/2013 05:41 - United States - Lamar

Today, I found my dad drunk, sitting on the bathroom floor crying. When I asked him why, he said, "My son is gay." I'm his only child, and I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 374

You deserved it 3 053

By Anonymous - 05/03/2011 11:43 - France

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 883

You deserved it 4 905

Mum

By mummer11 - 15/11/2013 17:49 - Ireland

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred, "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 019

You deserved it 3 128

By Anonymous - 09/05/2014 23:57 - United States - Akron

Today, my mom got drunk and started crying, ranting about all the things she could have done in life if I hadn't been born. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 431

You deserved it 4 140

By Anonymous - 23/06/2013 19:19 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was told by a friend that my girlfriend has been cheating on me. Her defence was that if I had a bigger dick she wouldn't have been, in her words, forced to go elsewhere for sex. My mother's response when I confided this in her: "Ask me if I care." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 327

You deserved it 5 038

razi1 20

Saturday 24 May 2014 1:05

Aw and they said size doesn't matter :p

715chiefs 15

Saturday 24 May 2014 1:10

The last time my mom got drunk, she left me at a diner in the middle of Nebraska. 50 miles away from where we lived.

Comments

omgimdying 15

Saturday 24 May 2014 3:06

That's an image you can't erase anytime soon.

md101 18

Saturday 24 May 2014 3:09

That must've blown..

GIGA_IMPACT 15

Saturday 24 May 2014 3:38

Secretly OP forgot to add the sentence, now I know where I get it from to the FML.

CallMeBloo 31

Saturday 24 May 2014 4:36

OP is a female.

blackunicorntear 8

Saturday 24 May 2014 3:42

if your a good child you will pretend it never happened and carry on with life... we all have moments of weakness

weveallbeenthere 30

Saturday 24 May 2014 4:01

YDI you asked she answered. never ask a drunk something when they are crying, unless you are prepared for an unexpected answer.

slyde32 12

Saturday 24 May 2014 7:06

yeah, I don't try asking the person who gave me life, food, shelter, and many other things what's wrong if I see her crying, either

purple_hippo 3

Saturday 24 May 2014 4:01

Pretty sure you're lying.

communisttaco 16

Saturday 24 May 2014 4:21

Я не знаю, что сказать

rosso700 14

Saturday 24 May 2014 4:22

Well technically that tiny penis made you so ....

flamingice13 11

Saturday 24 May 2014 4:38

I would have said "thank god I dont take after him"

slyde32 12

Saturday 24 May 2014 7:07

OP can't take after him, she doesn't have one at all

whys0serious 12

Saturday 24 May 2014 4:43

Somehow it often happens to people to see their parents drunk, or at least I've read quite a few postings about it here. Don't really understand that, is it that common? I've never seen my parents drunk, and I'm really glad about it. I mean, of course they've had friends over, and have been in parties and had a few drinks. But "drunk" describes for me a state in which you definitely looked too far in the glass...are so many people that irresponsible?