Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I had to take my little brother to the pool. He acted like a brat the whole time, and when I told him we were leaving, he ran away, slipped, and hit his face on the tile floor. He told my dad and step-mom I punched him. They believed him, and I'm grounded for two months. FML
Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML
Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says, "You're a bitch." He's 6. After I asked him where he heard that word, he responded with, "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML
Today, I got grounded for 2 weeks for slapping my brother after he threw a baseball at my head and hit my shin with a bat. He’s in 9th grade and I'm in 8th. He got ice cream to "cheer him up". FML
Today, I was playing tetherball with my younger brother. I get really competitive, so I threw it as hard as I could. It came around and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML
Today, I was at the mall with my little brother. I saw him touching some expensive objects, so I slapped his arm. I noticed he wasn't my brother when he started crying and his real mom slapped me in the face. FML
Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML
Today, my brother got mad at me for breaking the screen on his phone. He'd already dropped it so many times that the whole screen was cracked to the point that you couldn't see anything on it, but for some reason, I am fully responsible for its destruction because I accidentally delivered the finishing blow. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun and nice to pick my little brother up, but no, he accidentally kicked me in the balls. Twice. FML
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Top comments
ThomasBombadil 31
Little brothers are a pain sometimes. Thankfully they grow up.
iBanana 17
Well my brother ran me over with a snowmobile and blamed it on my GROWN ASS neighbor and my mum believed him and actually went to court about it. The lawyer was really cool, he had a marijuana plant dude smokin' a cig tattoo.
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Comments (103)
bleedingglitter 24
I have 4 brothers so I feel your pain. Now you can actually hit him and earn the punishment.
chitochito 17
FYL for being satan's sister. My brother once did something similar to me, ripping a framed photo off the wall, throwing it down a set of stairs, making a hole in the wall and blamed it all on me. Oh yeah, and he hit himself with the photo before and claimed I smacked him with it.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
And this is why I hate being the older sibling
ifuckuprandomly 28
I'd take the ball off him and throw it as hard as I could into his stomach... If you're gonna get grounded anyway, might as well go out in style (forgive the pun).
FoxOne_fml 12
*Shrugs shoulders* "Might as well have the fun if I get the blame anyway" *quick sucker punch to the face*