Today, my husband farted, grabbed a fan and blew the smell right at me. Disgusted, I reminded him that I’m a lady, not a dude. He burst out laughing and sang, "Dude looks like a lady." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while sitting on the couch with my husband, I farted quietly. Not a big deal, except it's hot out and our fan was blowing in his face, and it stunk. FML
Today, right before my hubby got home and walked into the bedroom, I farted. The smell was so bad that he thought he'd stepped in shit and to looked at the bottom of his shoes for dog poop. I laughed so hard, but with a horrified look he asked, "How"? He says I've got to see a doctor. FML
Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML
Today, my husband left our bedroom to go turn the thermostat down in the hall. I let out the smelliest fart, so bad that I had to blame it on our baby. He laughed and said, "I leave for one second and come back and it smells like a sewer in here." FML
Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
Today, after asking my hubby for what seems the millionth time to stop shoving his finger into my bum crack, I thought it would be funny to give him a taste of his own medicine by doing it to him. Right as my finger was in his crack, he let loose a huge fart. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my husband farted while he was naked and bending over to pick up his clothes, so me lying on the bed got a perfect view of his butthole twitching and flapping around as the gas escaped. Who says romance is dead? FML
Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML
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Top comments
sigurd 11
You should be able to handle someones farts and take it as a joke when you are married with them. Return the favor :)
SirTalkaton 22
It's not true love until you can fart in front of them. Sounds like you guys are golden
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Comments (89)
siriusjones 6
Toss a tampon at him.
Euphrates 10
You should say yeah and thats why you enjoy sex with me so much
JackFaire 27
I am going to lie to myself and pretend you said to him "Hey I don't think farts are funny" because that's a response that makes sense. Being male or female has jack to do with your sense of humor.
ChoolyBooly 32
You guys sound like a sweet and cute couple lol!
awesomesausage 14
Women want equality but still are bitching around that they need a fking special treatment because they are women-,-"
moodyreallyrocks 27
How rude! Sorry OP, sometimes I get so surprised at how inconsiderate spouses could be..
PuppiesKisses 19
Just be glad he doesn't know what an airzooka is! My brothers and I call it the FartZooka.
Tyrax 16
Dutch oven him in return.