Tell your husband and bartender this : screw you guys I'm going home. ( just like Eric Cartman)

OP - learn to take a joke.
#1 - improve yours (I've seen worse though)

Then start acting like a bitch

@ #62 - or she should STOP acting like one,

just act like Eric Cartman, best sollution.

Order the most expense drink then get up and leave when you're done.

I think they're adults... Adults. Not teenagers. Adults don't do that kind of stuff. Well I don't, but I'm a kid-adult.

Since its her husband that won't work.

I'd order a blow job and say that's the closest he's going to get to one.

It's pretty obvious he was just kidding around. I'm sure the bartender got a kick out of it. Sure it may be a tad embarrassing but it's just a joke. I wouldn't be with a girl very long if she got overly upset over something this minor. Laugh it off, OP, like others said order some other goofy drink name and fight fire with fire. You'll both get a laugh from it.

I've had boyfriends like that, that would say stuff similar to this and I would play along cause I knew they were joking and we both knew the bartender. Nothing's better than having a relationship when you can joke with one another!

What an asshole

Very female-like...

He's trying too be cool. This happens a lot

He was being "Punny"

Tell the bartender you'd like small dick because it reminds you of home. :)

That would either offend or excite the bartender.
Probably both.

OP should tell the bartender to hit her with the hardest "cocktail" he's got.

Make sure it's straight up with a twist! (:

Sounds like it's going to be an interesting vacation.

Tell him to get used to his next drink. The "No sex on the beach".

Or the 'Underachiever in Bed' or maybe even the 'Premature Bust' ?

The 'Premature Bust' sounds interesting. What's it taste like?

Bitter disappointment and it quite doesn't hit the spot... very dry and unsatisfying aftertaste in guessing.

how bout the tornado?
exciting at first but always ends in disaster.

I'm going to guess it tastes like failure.

Isn't that the hurricane?

Just laugh it off. You're the bigger person here (obviously) so don't let your husband pull you down to his level.

Or laugh it off as its meant to be a joke. Hopefully

Hahaha. That's really mean but funny. Hopefully he was joking

what a son of one. do they have a drink called sons of bitches?

Give that guy a medal.
And your life sucks.