By Anonymous - 23/09/2012 11:01 - United States

Today, my girlfriend learned that calling someone a "stupid bitch" under your breath while staring right at them from six feet away works very differently in my house than at hers. She also learned my sister has one hell of a punch. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 679
You deserved it 12 550

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Who's the stupid bitch now?

RedSnuwolf 4

Your sister is a total badass. :)


Who's the stupid bitch now?

CaptainDoorknob 7

She deserved it. I hate when people mutter shit under their breath completely oblivious to the fact that everyone can hear them.

Agreed dude, my sister always does that.

Zoh_Aubrey 8

Talk shit = get hit.

35 - Plato would be proud of that.

Hey, Karma's a bitch. A stupid bitch.

Watch her try to make an FML about this.

43- maybe if we stopped calling karma a bitch, it would be nicer to us.

Karma is only a bitch if you are one.

Wow, first the fml made me laugh, then everyone in this thread made me smile, and took me to my happy place! Love the Plato comment!

46 - It'd probably go like: "Today, *insert something insignificant that pissed her off here*. I called her a stupid bitch under my breath. Then she punched me! It still hurts! FML" OP - By the way, I think I'm in love with your badass sister.

personally i think that's great. Unfortunately after about 16, it doesn't really work. My brother (2 years younger) was the king of under the breath talking and hateful glares. Finally one day I got sick of it. I remember telling him to "go ahead and hit me, and i would show him how much of a girl he really was". today my brother is a total loser and probably on welfare. If it was possible to voluntarily restrict family members from federal programs, i would have him banned because he is just lazy and good for nothing. Maybe that hit will send the "OPs" girlfriend on a completely different path.

K_kanaka 26

Well I hope your girlfriend learned if you got nothing to say to someone then don't say anything about someone... preferably not six feet away from them.

RedSnuwolf 4

Your sister is a total badass. :)

And your girlfriend's a bit of a bitch herself!

Your sister MUST be a lesbian. There is no other viable explanation. (idiots out there - please realise I am joking).

34- I must be an idiot. Can you please explain the joke to me?

Sexy_Kisses14 8

No. If it's too subtle for you, then tough shit.

Stop yelling! D:

It's okay 37, I don't get it either.

skyeyez9 24

straight girls are supposed to be submissive doormats, and lesbians defend themselves?

gmc_blossom 21

34- That joke was bad and you should feel bad.

SenselessPattern 12

I got it, still not great, but I got it. Basically, sister must be lesbian to punch OP's GF since only guys can fight/know how to punch/solve things with violence, since lesbians fill the role of the guy and girl in a relationship. At least, I think that's the joke. Ugh....

So is she your ex now?

60- I'm clearly a lesbian then.

The joke was funny. Made me laugh, and feel sad that it went over so many heads.

Not really. She's still a stupid bitch for over reacting. More like a psychotic stupid bitch now

109 - conform. Conform dammit!!! You are not allowed to find it funny. Conform you bastard!!!!


I am awed at the masterpiece that is your comment! Really, you must have an IQ of a thousand to have come up with something so clever!

His IQ must be... Over 9000!?

Krajjan 9

How exactly does that work in her house? I see no way that doesn't end badly anywhere.

Carpet vs hardwood flooring, absorbing sound vs carrying it

Krajjan 9

Snooki vs Laila Ali?

desireev 17

4- I think OP is saying that she gets away with muttering names under her breath in her house. Way to go, OPs sister! Glad to see that you put her in her place. :)

*Op's girlfriend* " stupid bitch. *Op's sister* " hey there is something on your face. *PUNCH* IT WAS PAINNNN.

Maybe all of OP's girlfriend's family members are death... and blind?

hopsinlove17 26

133- deaf...?

Asdf is the best haha

Maybe they argue but don't resort to violence.

union_j 3

This is the best comment ever!!!

Haha, your girlfriend deserves it. You, however, do not. Bet she'll never do that again.

Exactly. Where're the Y(GF)DI and I agree you sister's life sucks (for having to put up with your GF) buttons?

cheshireau 26

I wonder why he is with her OR why he didn't stick up for her. Someone is out of line and if it's the Girlfriend, get rid of her. I wouldn't date anyone who took a shot at my sister.

Emily9352 13

I love your picture.

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

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ThePsyche 9


Hitting someone just because they called you a bitch is a bit of an overreaction.

ThePsyche 9

No si eres mexicano ;)

Zoh_Aubrey 8

Yeah but she called OP's sister a bitch in HER (sisters) house. Who allows to be disrespected in their own house?

AriJMlovesMJ 2

I agree. What are we, in middle school?

I agree. Sounds like they are both "stupid bitches." The girlfriend is horribly disrespectful, and the sister assaults people who say things she doesn't like. FYL OP, for being stuck in the middle of those two hotheads. Duck and cover.

Jackasss_fml 14

Your mom is a worthless C U N T. Let me know if you wanna punch me or have a " talk"

You kidding? If you called me a bitch, you'd better be prepared for at least a broken nose

It's not "her house", her parents are paying for it. Technically the government is paying for it, since her parents get their money from the government. But regardless who's house it is, if his sister was being a stupid bitch, she deserves to be called one. It wasn't her fault that her boyfriends sister got so butthurt that she turned out to be some messed up psycho who can't contain her anger.

161 ... After reading your comments i have to ask. Do you know OP's girlfriend or like to keep the same trashy company? The girlfriend clearly disrespected the Op as well as the sister not to mention his parents. Last time I checked when you are with someone you owe the entire family a descent level of respect. She didn't give such respect so his sister stood up for herself. At least she's not a coward. She didn't talk under her breath, she dealt with the girl directly.

Just because they are related, that doesn't mean this girl needs to kiss his sisters ass if she did something that might've pissed her off. Everyone's calling this girl a bad ass and such but she could of started this situation, we don't know that. OP didn't mention how it started. His girl should of kept her comments to herself. What she said was pretty rude, but again we don't know how this started, and I don't think that punching her in the face over something stupid was really necessary. His sister needs to grow up and deal with verbal shit. If his girlfriend physically attacked his sister, she would have the right to defend herself. But please, is it necessary to get so defensive over a dumb little insult? Is she willing to risk getting charged or arrested for blowing up a situation that could of been avoided? They're both immature but I still have more sympathy for his girlfriend. His sisters a psychotic bitch who needs anger management.

perdix 29

What happens at her house? High fives?

ThePsyche 9

Edit: don't read the below. I was blabbering and shall promptly be thumbed down. Thank you. Man if someone called me a little bitch!! ..I would do absolutely nothing. I would probably lock myself in the restroom and cry bc it's so true. But seriously, if I got a hi five everytime I said the B word.. I'd have a hi five... Wait. 0.o

loserboii 11

Yea high fives to the face

gmc_blossom 21

26- What the ****?

desireev 17

High five... In the face... With a chair... Indeed.

Nice girlfriend ya got there... Why would you even allow her to speak about your family that way? Should've slapped her yourself! She's the one being a bitch here...

Exactly, she has no right to be insulting your family in your own house unless they disrespected her too, it's understandable but still not excusable. I would have been told off I insulted my BF's sister by my BF. OP should have a talk with her.

And that talk should consist of four letters: GTFO.

pabst4america 1

Fuck yea domestic violence

What happens In your house stays In your house. Lol

Apparently not if it's on for all the world to see.

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.***

thePr3da1i3nrulz 4

Except for herpies. That shit comes home with you...

SenselessPattern 12

Go ahead and hate me, but quoting the exact same quote from the Hangover isn't funny to me anymore. Oh shit, I stated an opinion. To the bunker!

That saying has been around for much longer than that crap movie.

thePr3da1i3nrulz 4

74- sorry if it isnt funny anymore, just the first thing that i thought after reading that haha

bizarre_ftw 21

136 - nope, it's still funny, it's not overused to the point of hatred therefore it can simply be considered a classic - plus it's good, you might notice the ones that become hated quickly due to overuse usually aren't (and it's the first thing that popped into my head too)

failgamer 7

Your girlfriend is learning well on how to act around your family.